YEENA

recently i’ve been on a journey of discovering myself. since 2020 i have been questioning a lot about my identity and my brain, i have recently come to realise i am a system. we have multiple alters, who i wont mention on this page as i don’t feel comfortable doing that. i haven’t been posting a lot because discovering myself has been a big part of my life recently and its used up a lot of my energy. i may not post or be active a lot on here, apologies.

I hate that whenever I try to make any sort of art relating to my alter human identity it always seems to go slightly wrong. for example, I've tried to draw how I see myself, but I can never get it quite right, and when I try to make masks of myself it never turns out even looking like a hyena. it feels so horrible. it feels like the world is trying to tell me that everything isn't real, and it's all my imagination. I know it's stupid to be this upset over little things like this, but recently I've been feeling super out of touch with my non human identity and so the little things are meaning a lot more to me.

I've given up on trying to figure things out. labels are hard and nothing feels right. I am a hyena, I'm a wolf and I'm a fox, I'm all. I don't know how to explain it with words, it's hard to, but writing it down helps. aaaaahhhh I'm just so confused

my identity is getting so confusing. I am a hyena, I am a wolf, I am a fox, I just am all of my types. it's not like they're theriotypes, they are me, I am them. the hyena, fox and wolf in me feel so different compared to the sandcat and Dalmatian. with my Dalmatian I can tell it's a past life because of shifting. my sandcat is a theriotype, it doesn't feel the same as the other parts of me and I can only really, willingly shift as a sandcat, while the rest are just me. it's like I'm a mix of all of these animals, but they're all seperate? almost like there's parts of me that are hyena, parts are wolf and parts are fox, so confusing.