Spider Man

Fuck you >:P

I want a divorce

This will give me nightmares.

I could do better

I don’t doubt it

Spider Dance Off!!!!!

I still want a divorce.

I want a divorce

I didn't do anything! It's just.. Broke!

The multimillion dollar suit that I BUILT for you just broke?! 

I'll ask Wade if he did anything but maybe you did a shit job building it!

Excuse me, webhead? What did you just say? And why would Wilson have even been around it?!

.... Are you kidding me??? @wadewilson-409 you might have to explain this one.

Do you have something to tell me?

... Are you kidding me?? Why don't you look at my first post.

Oh, we need to have some words about your sass, webhead.

I'm a grown man and you're not my dad

I might as well be! If it weren’t for me, you’d still be swinging around in fucking pajamas!

I made that costume myself! It wasn't fucking pajamas!

You can choose to believe that I either accidentally ripped the suit before jumping Spidey’s bones, or you can believe that sometime when the webhead isn’t around I like to put the suit on to build self confidence and while in the suit I went and got a hot dog because people always seem willing to give spidey a free hotdog. And while sitting up on a building eating said hotdog, I got attacked by a giant bird who not only got away with the hotdog but also ripped a hole in the suit as it used its talons to push me off the building.

You told me you accidentally threw a katana at it..?

I didn't do anything! It's just.. Broke!

The multimillion dollar suit that I BUILT for you just broke?! 

I'll ask Wade if he did anything but maybe you did a shit job building it!

Excuse me, webhead? What did you just say? And why would Wilson have even been around it?!

.... Are you kidding me??? @wadewilson-409 you might have to explain this one.

Do you have something to tell me?

... Are you kidding me?? Why don't you look at my first post.

Oh, we need to have some words about your sass, webhead.

I'm a grown man and you're not my dad

I might as well be! If it weren’t for me, you’d still be swinging around in fucking pajamas!

I made that costume myself! It wasn't fucking pajamas!

I didn't do anything! It's just.. Broke!

The multimillion dollar suit that I BUILT for you just broke?! 

I'll ask Wade if he did anything but maybe you did a shit job building it!

Excuse me, webhead? What did you just say? And why would Wilson have even been around it?!

.... Are you kidding me??? @wadewilson-409 you might have to explain this one.

Do you have something to tell me?

... Are you kidding me?? Why don't you look at my first post.

Oh, we need to have some words about your sass, webhead.

I'm a grown man and you're not my dad

I didn't do anything! It's just.. Broke!

The multimillion dollar suit that I BUILT for you just broke?! 

I'll ask Wade if he did anything but maybe you did a shit job building it!

Excuse me, webhead? What did you just say? And why would Wilson have even been around it?!

.... Are you kidding me??? @wadewilson-409 you might have to explain this one.

Do you have something to tell me?

... Are you kidding me?? Why don't you look at my first post.

I didn't do anything! It's just.. Broke!

The multimillion dollar suit that I BUILT for you just broke?! 

I'll ask Wade if he did anything but maybe you did a shit job building it!

Excuse me, webhead? What did you just say? And why would Wilson have even been around it?!

.... Are you kidding me??? @wadewilson-409 you might have to explain this one.

I didn't do anything! It's just.. Broke!

The multimillion dollar suit that I BUILT for you just broke?! 

I'll ask Wade if he did anything but maybe you did a shit job building it!

I didn't do anything! It's just.. Broke!

Yes. Welcome to your newfound fame.

HELL YEAH!

Hey….ouch.

Can I just say, in this photo, he looks easily 60

Don't ever ask your boyfriend what a kink collar is. You'll expect "(͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)" but actually get "(ಥ_ಥ)"

......What?

I don’t think we want to know

Probably not

Don't ever ask your boyfriend what a kink collar is. You'll expect "(͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)" but actually get "(ಥ_ಥ)"

......What?

Just... Dumb shit Wade and I talked about. I almost cried.

You didn’t know what a Kink collar was? And why the hell would you choose to ask Wade?

Well first off, I asked my boyfriend about a kink collar which I think is very appropriate and second, it's not what you would think. ಥ_ಥ