I'm a bit of a fixer upper, thats a minor thing.

Ok but imagine if your quirky internet famous/questionably employed emo son comes home with a boyfriend he met off the internet, and it’s a twink 4 years younger than him who won’t take off his winter hat, has his ass entirely out, appears to be illiterate, stays until Christmas Eve and when you click on your son’s new fun YouTube project he’s there again making sex tape jokes AND he took all the batteries out of your clocks

The rebrand of Dan from "oh my god my best friend is such a dork and i'm a cynical bitch but we have fun together" to "i'm in love with this dumb bitch" is quite impressive, but Phil's rebrand from "i'm just a silly innocent guy with emo hair" to "i love talking about piss and gay sex to rile my boyfriend up and also i'm hot"??? Actually life changing

dnp should win an award for most emotionally complex podcast announcement ever

what nonphannies don’t understand is that it isn’t about “knowing” it’s about dnp’s queer joy and comfort level. we’re not happy bc they told us, we’re happy bc they felt comfortable and joyful enough to tell us. “knowing” has a weird power connotation. If you “knew” all along you’re trying to establish power over information that you don’t have authority on, and it takes power away from the people (dnp) telling you the information.

dan really said "fuck fascists" and "tboys for the win" and "I would lose the fans in the phivorce" and "you were my first boyfriend" and "this is my therapy homework" and "shout-out to the artists and the autists" and "we need to leave something for the yaoi" and phil said "maybe don't film YouTube videos with someone the day you meet" and "my coming out video was shorter" and "I'm too fun for you to leave me" and "you've got issues, I've got less" and "we were gay the whole time" and "don't follow our example" and "it's the shared trauma"

a man who would go back into the closet for 15 years for you without even blinking, without even thinking there’s anything to forgive you for, fully believing all that patience and time and space and agony was completely worth it because he loves you that much and is that devoted to you. a horrible liar who spends 15 years lying because you aren’t ready to tell the truth yet. you might think that this man doesn’t exist but he does. and his name is phil lester