Fuck You You Fucking Fuck

That’s good, because you’re cute and all but so not my type. There’s this little ice cream shop that is a couple blocks from here and it is always open super late.

And I’m sure there is nothing you did to make your coach want to bust your ass even more.

I can swing it. Don’t go getting any ideas that this is a date though.

Mom, really was justified in her saltiness. Are you ready for your next swim meet?

Well, come on. I need ice cream stat.

Which is kind of gross, but lets not talk about that.

Yeah, and Uncle Mikey. Although, I think he was just salty Mom called Nathaniel bathtub for so long.

Iconic. So since you’ve decided to pass on drunk brother duty, do you want to ditch this place?

You’re not wrong. From the stories her saltiness could rival Grandpa Nate’s.

As it should be. Some people just don’t understand that.

Aunt Brandi is my role model.

A girl with priorities. I knew I liked you.

You act like that surprises you Jace. Have I taught you nothing over the years?

You could put his head in a trash can. Now, your problem is solved.

Jasmine isn’t wrong, Bonnie is an unfortunate name.

Aw, look at you. I’m so proud.

Let’s just call it my gut intuition. Or maybe my bitch radar.