very cursed

6.) woman flees across frozen tundra from evil mechanical whales from another dimension 7.) frightend young boy is chased through forest by the Wild Hunt and their eldritch hounds

8.) Baba Yaga has kidnapped you and prepares to cannibalize you as part of a hearty and well-balanced meal  9.) Drinking a stolen soda at the bottom of the Mariana Trench and burping from the highly-pressurized gas 10.) mute woman has quiet sexy encounter with an amphibious monster in an aquarium 11.)  n00b necromancer digs up bones from a church graveyard for the first time, crying with guild and anxiety as angry spirits murmur in anger at her trespassing

12.) Hiding scared and alone in the dark as the fabric of reality is unwoven by interdimensional forces beyond our understanding, and the world as we know it comes to a dark and brutal end 13.) Amateur cryptid-hunter hikes alone through woods on a breezy summer’s day, searching for evidence of the paranormal and oblivious to danger 14.) lesbian lumberjack chops down tree in the early morning while thinking dreamily about her new wife

OH?

a concept: vampires sipping blood from those medical bags like capri suns

one time i was on an old street in glasgow and i made a loud joke about vampires and as i did this beautiful man with long hair on the other side of the street made direct eye contact with me and then ten minutes later he walked by again and looked at me and I still count that on my list of the five closest times I’ve ever come to dying

likely: I am just too loud to not look at in public places and he was just lost downtown also likely: vampire, scoping me out for the kill

maybe the vampire just thought you were hot and funny?

a vampire finding u hot and interesting is AS bad as them finding you ugly and annoying as far as the Trying To Remain Human And Alive thing goes

It must be hard for the vampire too. Technically as they prey on humans for their blood, they rank higher than us in the food chain. To them, we are but sentient sandwiches. A vampire finding a human attractive has my eternal sympathy, because it’s basically like falling in love with a sandwich and that must be difficult to process.

My body is shaking with a deep and profound envy. This is the single greatest garment to ever grace my eyes.