Poseidon's kid

Please, please don't.

I don't want to. I'm sorry.

I can't stop.

Whatever they put in my bloodstream turned me into a merciless monster.

It's like I'm trapped behind a glass wall. Watching everything happen yet being unable to stop my finger from pulling the trigger or swinging the blade.

Somebody... help.

I don't want to kill these people.

They haven't done anything wrong.

"Good job, soldier. Another problem was taken care of. But you're too slow, once again." Doctor Rot's voice never failed to solidify that glass wall.

"Maybe we'll use you for something else?" He leans forward. I could feel their blood staining my hands as he tapped the side of my head.

We'll make good use of you yet, little soldier.

- December, XX 1991 -

It took a while, but that glass wall is gone now. It has been for some time. Though that doesn't mean what I did has left my mind. All those people I killed.

The children.

Their screams keep me awake at night. Yet another thing added to a long list that reminds me why I can't give up.

Not yet.

After a while, they made me some other soldiers clean up guy. It became my job to make sure not a single piece of evidence was left that could be traced back to HYDRA.

Oddly enough, I was good at it.

Especially when I did well picking up after the Winter Soldier as he was called. But it's like I know every move he'll make. So, it's easy to clean up what he leaves behind.

This particular scene, however, was messier than the others.

I glance over the scuff marks that show where a body was dragged. They would hint that this wasn't a typical car accident.

Alongside the tire tracks from the Winter Soldier's bike. And his footprints.

Every little thing would point out that these poor souls didn't die a normal death.

Which honestly would have been a mercy. If the muffled scream being abruptly cut off was anything to go by.

After a few seconds, the fire hissing from the smashed front end of the car became the only sound permeating the still air of the surrounding forest.

That and the slow, steady steps of the soldier.

He doesn't even spare me a glance as he moves back to his bike.

It was at times like this. Standing in the soldier's aftermath, I wanted to stop him.

Just to ask why he went along with HYDRA's plans.

Wasn't he strong enough to fight back?

But the glint of his metallic arm always warned me off.

That and the fact that he would kill any who got in the way of finishing his mission.

"Oh, James. What am I gonna do with this guy?"

Lately, I've found myself speaking aloud. When no one else but me and the Winter Soldier was around.

It helped to think James was somewhere listening to me. It soothed the screams I constantly heard.

And it wasn't like the soldier was going to tell anyone.

From what I knew, he didn't speak.

At all.

Huffing, I notice the soldier pause. Every bone in my body locks in place when he slightly turns his head my way.

Shit, this is new.

Why the hell is he looking at me?

Is he going to kill me?

Doctor Borisyuk, who took over for Doctor Rot, wouldn't be too happy if he did.

But surely, he knew I was also part of HYDRA.

I did trail after him for nearly every mission he went on. Keeping an eye on him. And making sure his missions were a success.

Well, most of them.

I examine the side of his face. Meeting the single empty blue eye that peered at me from over his shoulder for a split second. Before he focused back on the dirt road and took off.

The roar of his motorcycle cut through the stifling silence before fading away.

Leaving nothing but the crackling fire in its place.

Weird. But now wasn't the time for me to be worried about such. I have to clean up the scene and get out of here.

I sigh before making my way closer to the car.

Inside were the bodies of Howard and Maria Stark.

I never knew the man personally, but I remember seeing him and his first invention flop. It was a fond memory I held close.

Wordlessly I lean forward to rest my hand on Howard's shoulder.

"Find peace in the afterlife, friend." I glance at the woman next to him. A dull ache spread through my chest as I pull away from Howard.

If only I had died with James that day. Like these two who died together.

Shaking my head, I hiss, "Enough."

There's no point agonizing over the past.

Focus on the here and now. Until HYDRA is completely wiped out, I can't stop.

Yet everywhere I look, there seems to be something to remind me of the past.

I glance at Howard again.

Focus.

Not much information was passed around about these missions. Yet I made sure to keep myself updated as much as I could about the years they woke me up in. It let me clean up the scenes a bit better.

Scanning the surrounding area, I note the camera high up in one of the trees close to the scene. Or what remained of it.

When had he shot that?

Scoffing again, I make my way over to the tree. This was going to take a while. I knew I'd hear about it later.

- XXXX Hours Later -

"You're finally back," Doctor Borisyuk eyes me from his perch. "You have leaves in your hair."

It takes everything in me not to lunge forward.

This guy took after Doctor Rot a lot. From the unnerving grin to his unsympathetic eyes. Oddly enough, I didn't mind his presence as much as Doctor Rot.

Maybe it was because he let others do his dirty work? And I never saw him when they woke me up or put me to sleep.

The room around me stilled when fingers fluttered up to my hair. It was odd to have someone touch my hair so lightly after all this time. Especially when there was no ill intent behind it.

For a moment, all I could see were empty blue eyes before Doctor Borisyuk pulled back.

A single golden-brown leaf was held up between us.

"You should be more careful."

Or maybe it was for moments like this that I didn't mind him as much as Doctor Rot. With him being offhandedly kind.

"It would be a shame to lose someone like you. I rely on you a lot, you know?" He moved to hop back up on the desk. The taupe-colored wood contrasted starkly with his black uniform making him stand out more so than he already did.

"Go get some rest. You've earned it." He crossed one leg over the other. The stiff black boots he wore creaked with the movement.

"But do be back by oh four hundred hours, will you? There's no rest for the wicked, I'm afraid."

I bobbed my head towards him. Then make my way back into the long, desolate halls of HYDRA's headquarters. Empty blue eyes will haunt me for the rest of my life. Just like the cries of those people.

Next chapter -> tbd