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Really glad predictive text exists. Should i bring my own parking lot

Very reasonable california question

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And for my next trick I’m adding more speed bumps to this tiny parking garage

🐟

Get your ducks in a row. Now get them in a circle. Get them in a Socratic seminar with that duck in the middle. Get them in a mosh pit. Get them moshing. Get them moshing.

cut off the toxic man in your life you’ll get so much done

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They’ve infiltrated my childhood Trader Joe’s and replaced the stuffed mascot with a sentient pelican named penny

#where is joey #bring him back #sign out front says “big changes coming to your neighborhood Trader Joe’s’’

ravioliet

a long distance friend is kind of a dead wife in a way

via-gets-stranger

@khlorescence

trader joe’s rice pudding and I are getting married on the 25th and you’re all invited

writer’s block so bad I remembered I can draw

#it’s been three years

xalatath

You misused thou/thee in a joke post and provoked my ire.

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sourdough-seal

writing is easy actually. all you have to do is tell people what happened

enjoylentgreen

lorillee

big tshirt that says YOUR INTERPRETATIONS MUST HAVE A STRONG BASIS IN THE SOURCE MATERIAL on the front and I HATE FUN on the back

things happening to me at the local domestic airport that have never happened to a guy before.

trigona-necrophaga

what if we “reimagined” [redacted play] in a way that completely ignores the themes and thus nullifies its impact and meaning

#my favorite interpretation is when we don’t even read the source material properly

thoodleoo

oh so when other people call a baby "cute enough to eat" it's sweet and charming. but when i, cronus,

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Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.

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ceci n’est pas une functioning adult

love will tear us apart playing in my study cafe. is there no escape.

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