🔔 jingles miserably arcoss the floor 🔔

I cant think anymore

what can i do to help this time

ive invented (note: dubious claim) something i call the bear diet which is mostly fruits and vegetables with fish as the main protein source and something like once a month you eat a few hyperprocessed foods of your liking because that is when you, the bear, raid a dumpster in the suburbs

after the hyperprocessed foods, do you take tranquilizers to simulate getting captured by animal control and returned to the wild?

i would settle for melatonin gummies but well. knock yourself out

Top ten reasons to kill yourself ranked by virtue

on new year’s eve 1999 i cut my fingure on a can illustrating the importance of small things

I NEED A SICKO… im holding out for a sicko till the end of the night ..and hes gotta haha and hes gotta say yess at the window with a look of delight

awww the like button turns into a rainbow when you press it! that's so cute...hey staff what's with all the trans women you keep nuking?

i think we should be ridiculing them more for this. you don't get to try and go all "queer website" when your staff likes to go on nuking sprees targeting the trans fem users

would be remiss not to mention that the rainbow notably straight up just removed the trans flag colors from it. like they’re gone. it’s the progress flag minus the trans flag colors.

hey staff what the fuck

hey staff don't you think you're being too on-the-nose

there are too many things happening this summer that i'm thinking we are going to need an extra 6-12 months of june and possibly another 3-4 months of july. probably no extra august as the problem should hopefully sort itself out by then. we are also looking into extending the day night cycle to 55 hours and extending the human lifespan to 10000 years.

fellatio sounds like a supporting shakespeare character rather than oral sex on a penis to be honest

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If you want to avoid Xitter, they also have a linktree

my hands hurt

Image ID/Transcript: [Text that reads, "I philosophized My Way Into This Mess, And I'll Kill myself My Way Out". the words "philosophized" and "Kill myself" both appear to be pasted in over an original message.]/End ID