Dark thoughts

There I am, finally completely naked here on tumblr. Since some days I did not manage to resist to this temptation. It had become a true obsession, for me! The pictures I had posted these last days were no longer sufficient to satisfy my exhibitionism, my wish to be looked naked, to appear on all the screens completely naked. I hesitated to do it for long time because I didn't know if it could be acceptable for tumblr. So, yesterday evening I made researches and discovered that there are already several women who have showed herselves naked on the site. I understood, so, that if nudes are not vulgar or of sexual nature should be accepted. I hope I understood right. For prudence, I applied blur 15%, that anyway allows enough to do see for the first time, beyond my body and my breast, even what my feminine features of the pubic zone look like. Displaying bare my slit shaved on the everybody's screens causes to me a lot of emotion, I have to confess it. It's a really intimate thing, which few women do and usually work in the sex or even porn field. It makes me beat strong the heart. Much much much. I feel it in my chest, slamming hard against the ribs. I wish your hand on my bare chest, a bit at left, or an ear or the button of a steth, to feel the heart and its beats. I hope with all my heart that among those who see me on their screen there are people who know me in real life. They see me always dressed, at least partially; of me they know only visage, hands and feet. I find very spicy that they see all my body naked and desire a lot it happens. I wish not to be misunderstood and mistaked for a non serious person. As I already explained, I am a respected professional, esteemed for the quality of my work. But I have also a secret side, that I have to hide in the daily life but that often overhelms me. Offering me naked to the other people's sight is one of my main fetishes. In real life, not always I can vent this my unusual inclination. But in the web everything is different. I can even talk about; in real life it's impossible. If by chance some of my acquaintances sees me naked on his screen, I pray him to inform me! If he doesn't have the courage to ask me a personal meeting, only he and I, I answer already that I accept, anyone he is. Even more: I desire it. No sex; but I promise I will undress totally for him, so that he can see me naked also live and close up and can touch my skin everywhere with his hands. Any location is ok: a flat, a room, a desert wood, an hotel, a meadow outdoor not frequented by families and children. I will be grateful if he will take me a series of photographs totally naked. I can't wait!!!

If you look at me well, maybe you manage to notice a light contraction of my areolas. They appear a bit smaller than the real. This is due to a slight breeze not much warm which was caressing my breasts and all my body, but especially to a certain excitement which had taken me. There is a reason. For years, when I had time I used to go and tan naked in a rather far beach, difficult to reach, where almost all the people stayed naked. So, nobody payed attention to the others. But a series of landslides took off the steep path which reached it. In addition now the access to the beach is forbidden and it's right so: every now and then some big rocks come down and are able to kill somebody. So, from some years, I have been forced to choose other beaches. But, given that they are more easily reachable and there is people of every kind, nobody dares staying naked. All have a swimsuit on. Even bare breasts are very rare. I dislike wearing a bra, so used to stay topless anyway. But, as I wrote under my last picture, I want to arrive gradually to publish here on tumblr pictures of myself totally naked, because the awareness to be seen naked in every detail by many people on their screens makes me dream and makes beat strong my heart. So, I called a my friend (I have not a bf) who already saw me and photographed naked more than once. He knows that, if I call him, it means I desire some nudes; so, he comes always willingly :D Arrived to the beach, we found several people. Nobody was naked. But I had decided to dare. I removed my shirt: underneath, my torso was naked, as always. I saw eyes moving and fixing to my chest. I ignored them and removed my jeans too, remaining with only a thong on. But the thing is not finished here. I was aware that many male eyes were looking at me, maybe excited. I was getting excited too and had come for that: extracted first one, then the other leg from the thong and remained completely naked in front of everybody. I was the only person naked and was happy to be such. I reached the sea passing on purpose naked across the people and walked along the water's edge to the left and to the right several times, avoiding with care to cover with my hands my breasts and my intimate parts, which I had shaved totally so that everybody can see well my whole pubis bare and my uncovered slit. It was the first time I denuded myself at the sea with the precise goal to be looked at. And I started feeling the beats of my heart in the chest, ever faster. I covered the about 20 m to come back to my friend with my fingers on the empty space between the left ribs, to feel and enjoy the beats of the heart with the fingertips. I would have wanted to have a needle to plant it in my heart, piercing it while beating so strong, so full of blood. I would have wanted to threw me supine to the sand, naked as I was and with the needle stuck in the heart, squirting blood in front of all. My nipples and my areolas were wrinkling by excitement (here's the reason I talked above about). But stop to dreams and let's come to the ground. I brough the friend who was with me to a small hill of sand and posed naked for his lens. It was an old and cheap device: ideal to be used in a salty environment and under the sun. The pictures miss sharpness, of course. I worked the less ungly of them, cropping it in a way to let see only a very small part of my slit, in clit area. It's anyway bold enough. It's a new, small step toward my complete nudity on tumblr, my objective. If this pic will be accepted and I will not receive warnings, I'll call my friend again, for a new step forward. I wish to show me to everybody completely naked, included my pubis, shaved and denuded for whole. Initially from distant, but bare.

This picture has been taken with a precise function: the advertising. I experienced what maybe many women dream but very few have had the courage and the possibility to live really: I exposed myself completely naked on a stage in front of many stranger spectators, who had payed a ticket only to see the bare body of a young woman. This thing was born four years ago. As I wrote elsewhere, I am not a stripteaseuse but a professional in the fiscal/financial field. But I suffer from at least two strong fetishes: my heart and my nudity, especially in public. I don't manage to vent the first but found the way to vent the second: by searching for, I found a small private theater at disposal of whoever wanted to offer some type of spectacle, as playing an instrument, declaiming poetries, dancing, presenting videos of holidays or of exotic places. I took contact with the owner, a gentle retiree who rounds up his earnings that way. It was the first time he received the proposal of a young woman to undress and dance naked on stage; surprised enough, asked me first to undress topless, then to make a test as example, with him as unique spectator. I noticed he got aroused, really much, but controlled himself and accepted. He took care of advertising, a bit personally, a bit by means of an agency. So, I lived this fantastic experience I desired deeply, naked on stage in front of everybody. Four times: Once in the year for four years. The last time was the last summer. 50 tickets sold the first time, all sold out the fourth time, beyond the most capacity of 200 spectators. Also thanks to a picture, taken by him, where I appeared naked under the shower, cut at pubis level but with my face visible. It was clear to the potential spectators that they would have seen even my shaved slit on stage: this was a powerful incentive to come and see me. The first time, anyway, my heart gave up suddenly during the show, due to effort and especially to a too great emotion at the moment to remove my last item of clothing. I let me fall to the floor but I recovered in a few minutes and removed also my little black panties, going with joy to the edge of the stage and moving to the left and to the right with raised arms to be admired from closely in every detail, also the most intimate ones, the shaved and dripping genitals, from so short distance to can touch them, if they wanted! The bigger joy ever lived! Now I'm ready for the fifth exhibition. The owner and I myself have agreed on a new photo as advertising. I decided not to show the visage, this time, to put in evidence the body, more precisely its front part, from the throat to the pubis. A wild, animal image of me. I didn't want that my face distracted the potential spectators: I desired total focus to my torso, my ribs, the chest, breast and nipples, the belly, the pubis, and to what there is inside: the internal organs! The liver, the spleen, the stomach, the lungs and the most important of them, the part of me born to be hit and penetrated: the heart! My heart! I didn't resist to my wish to upload the picture here too, on tumblr. It's slightly bolder than the ones I uploaded so far. I felt a lot of wish to show my torso again on the screens in a picture where it's evident I'm naked. It works as a test as well: I want to understand if it may be accepted or violates the rules. This because my objective is to appear, step by step, completely naked from the head to the feet, here on tumblr! I'd love everybody sees everything of me. It might be an incentive to have a meeting with me. If he was a dark cardiophile, the meeting would be a wonderful occasion to give free vent to the secret desires of both!

I don't have any intention to die, but deep cardiac massages and punctures to the heart may excite me like nothing else. I'm wishing to risk; I only need a suitable partner.

IMP.: Please, propose something feasible! Although dangerous, I will accept it. If you answer: "I will kill you with a stab to the heart", I will be obliged to accept. The supreme moment will be wonderful, but I'd prefer to live a little again!

---> chat

- I said up! - I exclaimed, while climbing the steps fastly, dressed so how I was: barefoot and practically naked. Only my sex was covered by the panties. He didn't try to stop me. Followed me with the camera in his hand, while I threw myself to the couch. I had wish to cry and believe you see it in the photo. In the same time I desired a photo: I loved the contrast between the dark leather of the couch and the clear skin of my body. And I loved to be watched almost naked by the responsible of PR and by the members who assisted to the scene. Males. They weren't few: I was aware that my body could be an attraction for the fetishists frequenting the club. The Gorilla was very skillful to focus on my face, even if the body went out of focus because of the shallow depth of field, due to the great aperture. Light in the room was low and a flash usually produces flat results. Without flash, instead, my body has a human shape. Better than so he could not make. He hemphasized the most important thing, my face, which was really very expressive that moment. I made him my congrats. He answered coldly enough: - If you are not able to stand a slap, what do you do here? Go and spend your free time in a cooking club: it's better. The PR man was listening and laughed. Went close and said me: - Don't listen to him. He's a rascal. If you want, the club opens you its arms, will be happy to have you as a member. And I heard a general clapping and many voices of approvation. Only then I noticed that many members had surrounded us. And only at that point I remembered that I was practically naked. My clothes, documents, keys and money I had left them in the basement. But I didn't go down to bring them at once. I was beginning to feel and to appreciate the warmth of their gazes on my skin. In the end, in a BDSM club a bare breast, an almost naked female body should not be a reason of scandal. Likely I could even denude me completely, even shaved. If I'll frequent the place, I'll do it. I decided to join. I passed the rest of the evening among the others, walking barefoot and wearing only my black panties. Only later I realized that even my cheek was black, close to the eye. Patience. One after the other, big part of males came to chat with me, sitting, curled up or eased down on the couch dressed like you see me in the picture. Some of them might be interesting, in perspective.

NOTE - He sent me also a pic, taken by the webcam, where there is, in addition to my totally bare frontal part, also my shaved pubis, with the slit in foreground. I would like a lot to post it to show me to everybody that way but I don't know what the censors think. Might I be banned? The photo is not vulgar but is "vulvar" :D

Here's the photo from which I extracted the image I posted to illustrate the story of the stab at the heart I received 10 years ago. The image had been censored by myself because I didn't know, because of lack of experience, if its integral version, with the breast naked in foreground, could be acceptable for Tumblr. Successively I found on the site a lot of much more intimate and explicit images. No doubt, so, that I can publish the pic so as it is, without cuts. I cared about displaying it, also because it's recent. It's from 2025, end of August. Et voilà! There I am!

My heart continued to beat fast in front of their eyes so close. I tried to read inside me what actually I desired. And I understood it. It was not the panties what I desired to show and nobody could be interested in my panties. I had to lay bare what there was underneath: my shaved pubis, my vulva so wet to drip. The white rivulet which was lowing out from my vagina. I wanted to show to everyone, live, the intimate reaction that an excited female body can have. For sure the spectators too were desiring the same thing. Languid music, lights turned off and I began to make descend my panties down, cm by cm. Then I pulled my feet out. And I threw my panties away. Finally I was completely naked and carried on dancing languidly on the table covered only by my skin. All were in silence, astonished and enchanted. I felt like in an unreal dream. I continued to dance naked, first almost in the dark, in the end with all the lights turned on! At the end of the music, I raised my arms to the sky and started walking on the table by moving me laterally like an actress, to pass in front to each of them, watching them in the eyes one after the other and smiling to everyone, exhibiting the frontal part of my body completely naked, with the nipples excited, the shaved vulva dripping of white liquid and the heart beating strong, perfectly visible near my left breast. It was utterly shocking for me. I believed to die. And I decided that I had to find a way to do it again, if possible in front of unknown people.

My heart area naked, where a dude sunk a blade when I was 20, having the heart as a target. It was an erotic play for him, but the facts say that he was willing to injure me, seriously too, and maybe even to kill me. Although knowing me, he couldn't know that for me it was not a play but something much more important: I dreamed a knife in my heart since child and was having my great and unrepeatable occasion, waited for many, too many years. So, I was willing to die for real. Not only willing: the more I got aroused, the more I wanted the blade in my heart, at the point that, in those crazy moments, it had become my objective! When the knife tip was 3 cm distant from the bare skin of my chest, just at the level of my tricuspid valve, while holding tight his wrists to slow down the knife, my by now uncontrollable excitement pushed me to open my hands all of a sudden, setting free all the force of his push. The blade was at least 8 cm long and well pointed: I was nearly sure that finally I would have experienced the blade of a knife plunged in the heart. In those moments I didn't desire anything else; all the rest of the world and my future had no longer any importance. Naturally the steely tip opened my flesh. But he managed to open his hands a fraction of second before the blade completed the crossing of my chest wall, diving into my heart. I bled a lot. The wound, rather large and deep, needed some weeks to close itself and left a scar, exactly at the height the heart. But also the scar disappeared in about four months. Years have passed and the one in the picture is the appearance of my cardiac region today. I would like to show me topless to all of you; I don't feel any shame not even naked and I am sure that the heart zone too would earn appeal if all the chest was visible naked. But this is the first picture I upload here, I'm lacking of practice and I don't know if this may be accepted by the staff. After 11 years, I would regret to be banned. If someone more expert than me assures me than I won't be punished, I will propose me for sure again, this time with at least the chest completely naked. I have a lot of wish to see me this way on the screen and, equally important, I want to offer this view to the numerous cardiophiles, because I would like to meet someone of them, uncover my chest in front of him, indicate my heart with my finger and put a long knife in his hand, to play again the game of the knife and the heart. It was the most exciting day of my life and I wish to play it again, topless, with a dangerous dark cardiophile who observes gasping the ever more fast beats of my heart lacking of any defense, visible near my left breast, looks at the blade, sufficient to cross a human heart from side to side and finds ever more difficult to control himself. It would be difficult for me too.

It's my 11 year anniversary on Tumblr 🥳