I'm saltier than the ocean

bonding with your houseplants by watering them from a water bottle you’ve already drank from

indirect kiss

I know next to nothing about botany but the phrase “feral sunflower” is hilarious to me

idk man i cant see a couple weeks into the future. i dont h

i dont have tw

i cant s

i dont have 20 eyes

gods, every time i see that Baiken one, i think, “…is she being controlled by her sentient, independent breasts?”

sometimes i’m like “i should buy some orange juice! i love it i don’t know why i never have it in the house” and then i get some and i remember it’s because some kind of dormant Scurvy Prevention Instinct activates within me like a sleeper agent trained to seek and destroy, except it’s just me standing in front of the open fridge at two in the morning chugging juice straight out of the carton like a crazed citrus gremlin 

it’s fun to stay at the Y

M

M

M

*smacks the side of my boom box to get the cd to stop skipping*

C

YOUNG MAN

Bishie anime figures are the true heirs to Greek sculpture

in this essay i won’t

fuck you for coming to my ted talk

Sad hank is sad

how did this chicken make such a heart wrenching face