disciple of pedante

HIATUS

first day I’ve not had intense killing myself feelings for a while and suddenly have two medical emergency situations going on and still have the coursework mountain and need to clean the entire flat before my family get back

"be yourself, everybody else is taken" ok but that only really works when you are a person! and i am an entity that only gets fleeting glimpses into what people call joy

well the good news is i'm not having the obnoxiously scary version of a breakdown like last month! just the standard one where i feel so stuck i can't move for hours at a time

i need it to be over now so that i can rest before i try to do it. but that's not how it works, is it?

if i play music i have to hear sounds but if i don't then i'm sitting in silence for the next ten hours while i look at a wall so who's to say what the best option is really

brb just gonna do nothing ever again