'Swaesome, Bruh @usssamwell - Tumblr Blog

Domestic Abuse goes up 38% when England loses. Be safe out there tonight. 💖

#not hockey just as important just in case someone needs it #world cup #football #domestic abuse #england #england fc #england football #fifa world cup 2026 #domestic violence #not hockey

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i-fear-gritty

i think if hollanov decide to have more than one kid at least one of them will be a goalie. and you know that kid is going first in whichever draft they end up in because they practiced on shane fucking hollander and ilya fucking rozanov (because if your dads were casually the two best centres in the nhl and two of the most successful hockey players on the planet, then you defend that net like your life depends on it)

everyone else in that years draft thinks this hollander-rozanov child got picked first out of nepotism (because who the fuck is that desperate to pick a goalie first overall in the draft?) until one day that team’s starting goalie is injured and all of a sudden your scoring chances have gone to hell because you’re trying to get the puck past cerberus, the three headed dog that guards the gates of hell

#nepotism #pft #my first draft pick marc andre fleury would be proud of you my child #now go and be a fucking menace on and off ice #for real tho that hockey iq #and best prep in the entire world #development camp is gonna be a holiday #imagine getting chirped by fucking hollanov-rozanov fucking jr #shane's blunt harshness mixed with Ilya's whole deal #those men are gonna cry #and he's probably get a game gordie howe hat trick and not a career one #heated rivalry #hollanov

brokentoasterrr

ilya posts a video on instagram with the caption “my husband and the dog he didn’t want” and it’s shane cradling anya like a baby outside the vet’s office whispering “you were so brave, honey. we’ll get you a pup cup on the drive home and you can sit in my lap while papa drives. you did such a good job when the scary lady poked you. such a good girl” and people everywhere lose their fucking minds

brokentoasterrr

i hate that you’re so right re: the orthorexic tendencies (and everything else. shane is buying slow feeder bowls and treat puzzles and feeding anya dog friendly soup once a week)

#lord my friend is like that #okay so shane makes sure they have a separate fridge freezer just for anya's food #and they're a set structure to how he does it #and occasionally she'll get a treat like a chick or something #her coat is so glossy and shiny #and i bet she loves carrots so much #and every now and then he makes her littls frozen yoghurt treats for the summer #which are filled with all this food she can eat and it helps cool her down #and is healthier than the dog ice cream that you can get #however they did get her dog beer once as a treat #omg no wait anya gets an advent calendar every year #and it is one that also gives her a bit of enrichment #heated rivalry

I think the saddest s2 thing is they are probably not going to be able to get Moana 😔

#the long game #heated rivalry #tlg spoilers

sheisraging

Good. That's what I want too.

#thank you for the comparison because this has been driving me insane #like 10 years an echo later #and its the same as it always has been #eurgh poetry #heated rivalry

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Watching Hudson boil alive in Paris rn like bud I'm so sorry, its not even the hottest its gonna get yet

#hudson williams #not hockey #free my man #who give him an industrial fan

yolkylemon

💪 💦

ilya version

#snoopy!!#heated rivalry

mina-logan

Such chemistry.

#oh this is beautiful #heated rivalry

lavenderprose

Crucially #myshane plays to his twentieth season which is just long enough to have the experience of meeting Ottawa's new draft prospect, also named Shane, and to smile and jokingly say, "Hey nice name," and for the rookie to gulp and say, "Thank you sir I am named after you" and that makes Shane sit in his stall and stare at the floor between his skates for. Significantly too long to be healthy.

#AHAHA MAKE THAT MAN GREY #heated rivalry

omgcheckplease

omg. Just finished penciling the first chapter of Check, Please! Year 5 🥹

funky-lil-lesbian

#omgcp

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hollanovs-ilya

I need... What? You know. Tell me. You. I need you.

#ilya is insane man #like i know you're trying to distance yourself to not kiss him #but like #that man crawls to you like you are the last drop of water in the desert #and you don't give him everything?#boy #heated rivalry

my-2nd-account

It's so important to me that everyone who meets Ilya feels safe around him. Shane at age 19 trusting him with his body and his sexuality and his reputation therefore his whole career. Svetlana who left home and could've gone anywhere but chose to move to Boston because guess who also lives there. Every person he's ever hooked up with because that's 100+ of people trusting him and saying yes. Yuna and David who spent less than an hour around him (Ilyushka not Rozanov) and accepted him as Shane's boyfriend even though they've spent the last decade hating him on Shane's behalf. Jackie trusting him with her kids after only meeting him once. Harris's family inviting him over so many times. His neighbors' kids making it a habit to wish him good luck before games. Troy coming out to him when it's his first time saying it out loud. Luca asking him for advice because he's finding it hard to "meet people". Coach Wiebe coming out to him and telling him about the guy he was in love with.

He's the safe space he needed growing up. He's the comfort person he wished for when he felt like he had no one. He's the familiar warm presence who has so much love to give to make up for all the love that was taken away from him.

#heated rivalry #yes #i saw this on twitter and had to rush over because exactly #ilya rozanov #and like he's this safe space for so many people but his brain tells him otherwise and he can't always see it #because he's only used to the way his family used him #he's not used to people trusting and loving him for him and not a paycheck

actuallysara

happy

#heated rivalry

ilyapasta

No one is doing it like Ilya Rozanov. He’s in a gladiator costume. He sent the rookies home from his party because he’s depressed. His boyfriend drove two hours with a butt plug in because Ilya looks hot in that gladiator costume and Hayden Pike called him a prude and that bothers him. Shane said I’m a freak and I need my boyfriend to know that, but Ilya can’t stop crying thinking about Shane. Ilya is looking down at his plugged up boyfriend giving him a bj under the gladiator skirt and he’s got tears in his eyes. He’s alarmed by the tears in his eyes and responds by fucking Shane nearly upside down on the couch like an inversion table. He’s doing fine. Maybe he should think about therapy.

$fractally blog's avatar$

fractally

Sometimes people say that Ilya’s characterization changes dramatically from HR to TLG but I think it’s more like the “expectation / reality” frame from 50 Days of Summer. We spend most of HR in Shane’s head perceiving Ilya as the coolest hottest man alive and the minute we hop into Ilya’s head it’s like oh. Oh no this man is sticking a fork into his toaster

ilyapasta

Ilya heard you must feel that you are abandoned by god to be a good top and said ah well yes and then never thought any deeper about it

reheatedrivalri

wonderful tags @butimaficwriter

ilyapasta

Not only are these A+ funny tags @butimaficwriter but yes! Ilya asks him to turn around and starts doing everything from behind but Shane actually says “I want to see you” and turns on his back but with the couch he’s still in the weird upside down position (hence my reference to an inversion table) so Ilya is still not letting him in. Still not letting shane see him. And Ilya keeps thinking about how he just wants to fuck Shane forever, stay inside him forever, but it points to how Ilya is using sex to avoid talking just as much as Shane. Ilya could stop at any moment and be like “actually I’m really struggling” but his depressed ass needs dopamine! Needs to feel the rush needs to feel the big feelings needs to feel washed and drenched in love because otherwise he’ll have to talk about the small feelings: self worth, loneliness, delayed grief, and his fear of loss.

And when he unravels in the morning as Shane is pulling out of the driveway he’s forced to feel all those delayed feelings all at once.

#and like #he has always been good at sex #that has always been something he can perform at #and he prides himself in being able to please his boyfriend #so even when he is struggling to do anything else #he knows he can do this one thing #this one barely hanging on thread of sanity #because so much of their relationship has been built on the physical #and they have struggled with communication #and he cannot even verbalise or even think through his own thoughts right now #how could he even begin to share that with shane #how can he explain when he doesn't know himself #so he resorts to the one thing he has worth in #because it isn't hockey anymore #but shane is only there so long and he can't run forever #my poor boy #heated rivalry #long post

Heard Florida Panthers are moving to a new rink for next season

#real hockey #but for real #what the hell are they even trying to do down there jesus #panther fans if you need help blink twice

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ilyapasta

Canon divergence from Heated Rivalry but The Long Game still happens the only thing that's different is that Shane calls Ilya baby consistently from cottage onwards

#heated rivalry #i don't care what the book says #this is factual

rainbow-femme

“Shane fuck Shane help we fucked up, we lost Ilya, I swear he was here one second ago and now-“

“Haas, where are you right now?”

“The club by the hotel.”

“And he’s not in the bathroom?”

“No.”

“Not on the roof?”

“No.”

“Not trying to access any of the dancers poles?”

“What? Why would- Oh, Troy says no.”

“Is he hanging out with drunk girls in the women’s bathroom?”

“Umm, one sec. Harris, can you ask her if Ilya is in there? … Harris says no.”

“Ok. What were you talking about before he disappeared?”

“We were trying to figure out where to eat.”

“Did anyone bring up sushi?”

“He didn’t say he wanted-“

“Just answer the question.”

“Uh yeah, someone suggested it, but he said he wanted-“

“He’s at the pier.”

“What?”

“He got bored, sushi put fish on his brain, which made him think about water, and he likes going to piers, and the hotel is walking distance from a boardwalk by the water. He’s there, most likely trying to look at fish going under the dock.”

“… How do you know that?”

“Do you have any ideas how many times I have gotten this exact phone call? He’s easier to catch if you bait him with mozzarella sticks but make sure he knows he only gets them if he comes quietly. If you let him negotiate he will take the sticks and run. Cliff always fell for that.”

rainbow-femme

@bolshe-ilya Big fan of your tags

#love that for them lmao #heated rivalry #this is why tho everything thinks Ilya would be the one to end up in a hangover type situation #hut actually its shane #this is why he knows his limits #alcohol drops his masking #and that is dangerous for everyone involved

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