[x. j.]

meow meow meow meow meow. did u ever think of that

Watching the mummy 1999 for shits and giggles, thought it'd be fun to bitch abt the inaccurate hieroglyphs now that I know smth abt all that. Disappointed and disgusted to find out that they hired an egyptologist consultant and the hieroglyphs are actually well done. Night ruined

listen...spray some of that nice perfume...use the good hand cream...wear that outfit even if you are just staying home...light those special candles you have been saving...enjoy those little things even if there is no occasion

oh so when the reader knows something i don’t it’s “dramatic irony” but when i know something the reader doesn’t suddenly i’m an “unreliable narrator” 🙄

“oh I’m too old for stuffed animals” skill issue. sorry you can’t appreciate little creatures made to hang out with you, I on the other hand am full of joyous whimsy and therefore vastly superior.

i never feel closer to my ancestors than when i start having visions of scary faces while i'm trying to get to sleep. i just know in my heart that grug the mammoth hunter and edward the 18th century dandy also saw the skull.

Welcome to autism subway can i get you the same thing you've ordered here since you were 8