So to all my siblings I am The Heel of the Family (because I am the oldest and also an easy target) and I know this is a weird fucked up expression of love and their way of knocking me down a small peg, but every now and then I think of texting them and being like "You don't actually think I'm lame, right? You think I'm a little cool, right? You like me, don't you?" Which I resist doing because I know that will fodder the cannon and my therapist once told me that my constant approval-seeking behavior will eventually sink me.

















