CONNOR AGNES

The train contained the shiniest jewel in the entire world. There, still trapped inside, were the two most important people to ever live. She had been surrounded by what was as good as strangers. Nobody was Aris, with the ability to know when to go silent and when to talk your ear off. Nobody was her Sonya, the only ray of light in their cruel world.

She was quick to find them near the back, their hands chained down on their laps. The sight of sunlight shining through and Harriet wading through it made her seem like an angel. She was there to save them after an eternity of hell.

As she wrapped her arms around them, a tight hug that she had missed, Sonya felt herself right back in the fire.

The essence of the Safe Haven was the same as she remembered. Tents were set up to ensure privacy and mark zones. People were fixing things up or laughing in groups like everything was normal.

Every few seconds, someone checked over their shoulder or above their head. The sanctuary of the place was disturbed by something that was still following her. Even with her new clothes and hair redone, every part of Sonya felt stuck there. There was something different about being in WCKD when they weren't afraid to show their true colors. When they were desperate and running low on resources and willing to sacrifice every little obstacle.

Sitting alone on the beach, she stared off into the distance. The fresh air filled her lungs, a salty scent that she was waiting to be replaced with cold lab air again.

Harriet stood there for a moment, watching her girlfriend ground herself in her new reality. Her heart was a hundred times lighter. The cage she had been trapped in finally opened with the key she had spent months making with her bare hands.

“Hey. You awake over here?”she teased, placing a hand on her shoulder. Freezing at the contact, she tensed in her spot. Her face flushed with heat as she held her breath. Darkness loomed in over her, a cloud of chemicals and fear taking over her being.

“Sonya?”

“Yeah. Yeah, I’m here,”she choked out, physically pulling away. Her stomach churned at the unexpected rejection as she crossed her arms over her chest to give them something to do. The waves moved on, a quiet swishing back and forth on the sand. Because even after everything they had been through, the world was still spinning. Whether they healed or not, it would always be spinning.

“I’m really sorry. For leaving you there so long. I tried to get there sooner but,”she trailed off.

“I know. It's still amazing that you got me out at all,”she promised, looking at her. As if to prove it, she patted the spot beside her, inviting her to sit with the sunset. She did so at a distance she wasn't used to. Only six months ago they were practically in each other's laps. Their knees not even touching was a lifetime apart.

“We can talk about it. We can talk about whatever you want,”she promised, still looking at her with the kind of soft eyes that people wait decades for.

“I don't feel like I got out. Yet,”she admitted, mindlessly dragging her finger through the sand in front of her. Not knowing what to say, she said nothing at all. The words were still building up, grievances that had been forced back trying to arrange themselves in something a little more comprehendable.

“I know it's you. But I’m still waiting to turn around and see . . . them,”she whispered, curling her knees to her chest. Feeling her heart shatter, she instinctively reached out to make it better only to catch herself at the last second.

“You are here now. With me. And I won't let anyone touch you again. Not until you want it.”

“Even if it's you?”

“Of course. Even if it's me.”

Still standing there, Harriet tried to figure out the best way to keep her promise and how to rearrange the room. The one cot was clearly out of the picture for now, but she wasn't sure what the best course of action for two would be. Completely opposite sides? Vertical and horizontal? Someone close to the door? There wasn't exactly a guide book for helping your traumatized lover heal after getting back from a government organization that also traumatized you.

Interrupting her train of thought, Sonya finally made it to their small space. Hearing her footsteps, she turned around to see her ready for bed, light hair hanging over her shoulders and Harriet’s old shirt she already got her hands on. As she was glued in that spot, her heart skipping a beat at the sight she died without, the single bed was noticed.

“We can share for a while. If we have to,”she reluctantly promised.

“No. Just figuring out how to go bother Vince about this,”she promised, making her way out. Before she left, she blew a kiss, a promise of permanent love without a single fingerprint exchanged. Catching it in her hand, she let herself truly grin for the first time in so long. She had almost forgotten what it felt like for your cheeks to hurt from pure happiness. She hadn't expected it to be because her girlfriend was already going out of her way to adjust to the hopefully temporary boundaries, but she wasn't at all shocked Harriet would work so quickly to do it.

@themazewomen