gray hair popping like crazy tonight 😳🥴
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he wasn't even looking at me and he found me
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@tymorrowland
gray hair popping like crazy tonight 😳🥴

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teamwork makes the dream work. and dreamwork. makes shrek
fantastic. i love it. i posted this after my wife said it yesterday and as i was doing it i was like "this can't be an original thought. as soon as i hit post someone's going to say 'you stole this from a tweet from 2014' and i'll say 'no, i stole it from my beautiful wife.'"
"focaccia, serves 4" yes all 4 me
"tiramisu, serves 2" yes all 2 myself
“Pie, serves 8” yes I 8 it all
"Cake, serves 10" yes I in10d to finish it

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a picture that’s worth a thousand words
Theres the lil thang

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btw your fat friends notice when the first thing you criticize about a bad person is their weight
A HAMMERHEAD????
I attended a campfire presentation by a park ranger who described Osprey as "both the pickiest and least picky eaters of all time."
They're the pickiest because they only eat things they can catch by plunging into at least six feet of water feet-first and are as close to their maximum carrying capacity as possible, to maximize calories-per-trip.
They're the Least Picky because so long as something fits those parameters, Osprey will go for it.
The ranger then showed us an extensive slide show of the local osprey in flight with their catches, which included: trout, carp, snakes, bass, eels, small sharks, ducks, surprisingly large catfish, a nerf football, muskrats, a summer sausage that fell off a boat, sneakers, a fish previously thought to be extinct in the area, a Barbie Doll, and another osprey.
listening to phil collins

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before someone screenshots this and posts it elsewhere this is me
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