uhhhh

The police chief’s wife who keeps telling him they need to leave this shithole is the smartest person in Widow’s Bay and the second smartest is the police chief himself who listened to Patricia explain what’s going on and immediately put in his one week’s notice. And even one week is generous given what’s been going on.

how did they successfully make Ruth the most charming character in the show in the span of half an episode. “this one takes 27 minutes to steep” she has a picture of evan on her fridge. she does story club. every boss she ever had made a pass including a nun. “I loved him… but he got bit by an animal and turned into that animal” She drops the most beautiful true to life philosophy in the show so far. She has to be Unkillable (spoken with the gritted teeth of someone with 28 minutes left in the episode)

i am begging everyone to tune in to widows bay on apple tv. it has it all. small island location. matthew rhys endearing try hard mayor. quirky and hilarious staff. evil fog. haunted inns. amazing comedic moments. killer clowns. boogeymen. sea hags. a dead priest. episode 4 my favorite by far. i love you patricia and i want to be your friend. my new favorite show rn

What if you were a woman in your FORTIES and after accidentally almost drowning your high school bullies via a self help book written by SATAN you help dig up the founder of your CURSED town only to find out HE IS STILL ALIVE and can communicate through little notes and you’re trying to be nice to the again IMMORTAL MAN WITH A POOPY POST IT IN HIS BOY LOCKET but he’s not being very nice so now you have to write another LITTLE NOTE and ask if he’s mad at you

"average small seaside town has 3 curses on it" factoid actualy just statistical error. average small seaside town has 0 curses on it. Widows Bay, Located in New England & who’s residents experience the horrors everyday of the week, is an outlier adn should not have been counted