Homosexual Tendences

It has been a long, crazy year with COVID. I am still shocked I haven’t gotten it yet. My employers call me a woman of steel. Weird flex, but okay.

Relationship update. We have decided to tie the knot. It’s officially been seven years since 1/5, so I took the plunge and asked my partner to marry me. He told me yes. So wedding planning has officially started. Super stressed and not sure where to start, but all that matters is that we are happy together.

It’s been pretty crazy. I’ve been living stealth for years now. I wish I could be okay with opening up about my trans-ness to people, but I fear for my safety and security. The times where I had to “out” myself have been grueling. I feel disgusting afterwards. I know I shouldn’t been afraid to share my identify, but just the fact that I can be rejected because of it hurts.

I’ve accepted that I am queer quick awhile ago. My partner and I have talked about it too. Growing up a cisgender, white, gay man was definitely something. I learned a lot from those experiences. When I decided to move forward with my transition eight years ago, I realized that it was okay to be myself and I opened up to the reality that I just might like people all around. Sure, I’ll always have a tendency to be attracted closer to male presenting people, but I still like female presenting people too.