Fruit (derogatory)

love when ppl ask to see pics of my axolotl and are expecting something cute + pink + all smiles and instead with genuine fear in their eyes, and in their heart, say WHAT the fuck is that.

Actually daddy you're being kinda needy can you shut the fuck up for a bit, kitten's got a banging headache.

you don’t need to reinvent yourself this summer; you simply need to return to the things that make you feel most like you

take me to Scot land 🏴󠁧󠁢󠁳󠁣󠁴󠁿😩 and kiss me 💋 on top of the locked nest monster 💘💕😍🦕

Mutual I wanna talk to you but I don't know what to say. I really like you and I enjoy our interactions I think you'd be an awesome person to be friends with in real life. Please do not attack me with a sledgehammer.

happy decade to the horrible beast i have wrought

Please respect my privacy

my deepest apologies

I forgive you

Anyway me when I suck that pharaoh good and hard through his scaramphigousus