Thoughts

before there were blorbos there were little meow meows and before there were little meow meows there were cinnamon rolls

If you close your eyes right before the rat hits, your brain will think that you have died. some people find calmness in this.

@pans1es

If you close your eyes right before the rat hits, your brain will think that you have died. some people find calmness in this.

@pans1es

I met a girl who did a very good half of exam but didn't actually know the answer, so she wrote a full page (two sides), left half a sentence at the end of the page and wrote "Page 1 of 2" and submitted that. Because the teacher assumed it was her fault and that she had lost half of the exam, she gave her a passing grade hoping she wouldn't complain. And she didn't, of course.

In college, I forgot I had a paper (that I hadn't written a word of) due, until the teacher asked us to pass them forward at the start of the class... I had my computer though, and so I said I had forgotten the printed copy at home, could I please run to the computer lab after class and print it and bring it right over? He said sure, he could wait a few minutes since it was just downstairs. I don't have to look at my hands to type, so I wrote it in class while staring at the board like I was taking notes, and printed it off after. Got a B on it.

#bullshitting takes many forms#and should be a skill kids are allowed to hone

imagining a universe where porn is a marketable genre so you have to deal with raycon ads while trying to jerk your shit

You’re an easy slut, aren’t you kitten? Almost as easy as dinner with Hellofresh

Being bisexual is my party trick if anything ever gets boring in a group of gay people i can just say “I was in a relationship with a woman for 5 years” and everybody acts like I just set off a bomb

Lenin vs trotsky was leftist infighting and therefore a distraction from the epstein files. #transandrophobia

hey its me your doctor. idgaf

Hello bisexual community

Begin killing