someone remind me of my tea

Yall are actually hospitable to y'alls hookups??? I never even let mine use the bathroom with the door closed. I’ll be damned if I let a fag steal my $30 vitamin C serum.

either that or take them to a p*rk in the d*rk sis 🌃🌙👀

And have mosquito bites on my taint??? No thanks

Idk maybe because I’m from Florida… but I can’t nut unless there’s mosquitos succin on my gouché 😌

Idk why God keeps letting you survive hurricane szn

Mosqussies??? Excuse me?!

#this post almost made me straight good loooordt

Slurp

hole tightening juice

let bottoms paint

nevermind!

absolute unit

I’m not the type of girl anybody wants to be with. My body takes up too much space and I laugh too loudly for too long and I shout when other people are quiet and when I’m drunk I type in caps and I always wanted to be mysterious and beautiful and untouchable like other girls but if you ask I will give you everything and I fucking despise that

youre the type of person i want to be with. your body is comforting and familiar and your laugh is contagious and your smile is breath taking and when youre excited your voice raises and it lights a little warmth in me and when youre drunk you can be sad and nostalgic and youre a nerd and youre awkward and clumsy and afraid of commitment but when i ask how long you want me for, you say. “as long as you do” and i want to give you everything and i freaking love you

What fucking witchcraft is this 😂

The hell I will!

im so glad i graduated

this is a fucking masterpiece

Somebody give this ignoramus a piece of actual shark skin and tell him to rub his face with it, let him find out just how “smooth” sharks really are.

Somebody did. I use it as a pillowcase because it’s so smooth.

Buddy. It’s smooth. The link you sent me led to a website that described how smooth they are. I dunno, maybe you don’t know how to read?

this post is transcendent

me and my buddy at the back of the classroom when the annoying kid is doing a presentation