Natrium's shitposting blog

uhm… pleased to bleat you? 🐑

Its cute when peoples understanding of Tumblr comes from screenshots of our best posts. They come here and post with a Screenshot Accent

Hey if you're feeling anxious because of this post I just want you to know you're being watched like a hawk and everyone is making fun of you and every time you ever make a mistake we go out to the woods and write it down in excruciating detail upon a big ancient oak tree that has a record of all your mistakes and we are all beautiful with aesthetically pleasing cocks and holes and breasts and we make out and what flaws we have are romanticize-able-- unlike yours-- and we are all deft cooks who produce sensual meals while we think of your lesser actions and activities.

deft cocks

around the world aropund the world

watching jerma's old stardew valley vids from ten years ago for the first time. this poor guy had like 5 cabbages planted and like 8 string beans on his entire farm. and a meteor hit his farm and obliterated half of his string beans. he attempted to break the meteor with a cherry bomb which only served to destroy 3 of the 4 remaining string beans. he destroyed the remaining string bean in a fit of rage

Anon bb come back i can change for you

usamerican soldier STUNNED into silence when he learns that his willing and paid participation in the murder and neocolonization of foreign people is a huge red flag to everyone with a conscience

everyone who reblogs this and is like "I ordered my own tea this week" or "I only barfed once when I had to give a presentation'- you are doing amazing sweetie. Have patience with yourself, you are relearning a skill so difficult that people get 4 year degrees to do it professionally.

time to make a post on tumblr. surely no one will interpret it to be as offensive and bad intentioned as possible.

this is my favourite addition to this post by far everyone go home. this freak won the post

every time someone realizes they dont have to pick between being a boy or a girl an angel gets its wings btw. and also extremely loud cheering can be heard in the distance from me specifically

being a dork and making your girlfriend laugh is worth a sillyion dollars

my aunt is watching some generic daytime tv talkshow and the hosts are very cheerfully going "yknow this AI thing isnt actually as cool as i thought it was- i keep noticing the google overview getting facts wrong! isnt that weird?" and its very funny watching regular middle aged people finally catch on. we did it lads it took long enough.

"incurious" still GOAT insult. You could be better but you're not. You could learn but you won't, and for no good reason, just a base dispositional apathy. Get fucked