G

my back hurts from Both my rack and my angel wings actually

got a crick in my neck and a frog in my throat and a chip on my shoulder and a stick up my ass and now you're gonna stand there puttin words in my mouth? haven't I been through enough?

girl who finally is going back to reading by finishing one book: now i'm going to read all the books in the world.

boobs is better than titties as a word because boobs is bouba while titties is kiki

official linguistics post

no offense but um…..off with your head

dance till youre dead

hey kinda messed up that 1st degree burn is the mildest burn but 1st degree murder is the worst murder. they should have collaborated more on that one.

ponderous guy whose pronouns are huh/hmm

hey babe im gonna be home late tonight do you mind picking up dinner. yeah sorry the king has us working over time, some fuckin egghead sat on the wall and had a GREAT fall. we've got all the men working on this but idk if we're gonna be able to put him back together again. yeah we've tried the horses. ok bye love you.

Maybe we can slow-roll abolition by requiring every cop down to the meter maid level pass the bar exam. If that doesn't work we up it to PhD.