Random musings. In Tumblr to escape.

In case you did not already know, here are LYX's many talents. It's insane how many different things he can do at a near-professional level beyond acting!

1. Dance/Ballet

LYX graduated from the Shanghai Theatre Academy majoring in ballet with over 11 years of professional experience.

This is him doing 13+ pirouettes in a performance of Tchaikovsky Rhapsody (full video, he's on the right)

Interpret dance solo (燃烧的火苗) where he won the first gold ever for STA (video, news)

Swan Lake solo at the Taoli Cup Dance Competition in high school (video)

Modern dancing solo (黑白影画) at his graduation performance (video, he's the only guy in white)

He also taught at the Macao Conservatory for a year and danced in front of national leaders in Flying to the Moon (奔月) at the Macao 10th Handover Anniversary (video)

He's super flexible and has a strong core (despite being naturally thin)

In response to request from fans, he performed the Black Moonlight dance in a now viral video on Douyin.

2. Wuxia / Posture

LYX is known as one of the best actors working today for wire work - you can see him here doing 3 consecutive jumps 2-3 stories above ground (compilation videos 1, 2)

He does a lot of his own stunts and is often better (i.e. more graceful) than his stunt double, even though it's really risky and he's sustained some serious injuries from being dropped accidentally (And the Winner is Love: B roll video, actual scene, other BTS, other fight scenes)

He moves with elegance, not just in action sequences (Ashes of Love fight compilation 1, 2), but people have made video compilations of how he walks, kneels, works his sleeves and train

Of course, it's thanks to his dance foundation, but he also puts a lot of hard work into stunt training. Not something a lot of actors do because it eats up time to make more TV or go on variety shows (Ashes of Love stunt training, BTS)

3. Diving

He played a diver once in Flip in Summer (夏日心跳) and actually learned to dive... I mean he's no Tom Daley but this looks pretty good for an amateur... (full video)

4. Voice Acting

He’s always dubbed himself since circa 2018 (with the exception of And the Winner is Love due to Covid logistics issues), which is not the norm in Chinese drama (Ashes of Love dubbing BTS). In fact, he is sometimes the only person in the cast to use his original voice (e.g. in Princess Silver)

He also lends his voice to animations - he was the voice of Viktor in Arcane (BTS video), which received positive feedback (most people didn't realize he was not a professional voice actor)

He appears as a judge and live dubbing performer in Voice Monster alongside the top voice actors in China, Bian Jiang (aka voice of Yehua in Eternal Love, Nan Wangj in the Untamed) and Zhang Jie (aka voice of Donghua in Eternal Love, Sifeng in Love & Redemption). He has so much respect to those working behind the scenes, and it really shows (full video)

5. Singing

Some of you may know that he started out in a boy band called JL with Fu Longfei - these videos didn't age well, but here you go: JL (MV), 我们 (MV)

He has released a number of solo singles, including 缘起 (MV), 星星之火 (live), 不是我 (MV), 等风停 (MV). and 勇 (soundtrack), which he composed and wrote the lyrics himself (these are all mando-pop ballads if that's your jam)

He performed Big Fish 大鱼 at Tmall's 11/11 Festival (live video) - while his rendition is not as powerful as the original, he can hit really high notes with an impressive falsetto - I think it goes up to G5 (one octave above middle C)

He performed Pipa Xing (琵琶行) at the Douyin Festival (live video) - the notable part is his Peking Opera style singing at the end

He occasionally releases covers of songs on Chinese karaoke app Changba or Douyin: 要不然我们就这样一万年 (youtube), 黑月光 (youtube), 不染 (youtube), 山水又一程 (youtube)

He can also sing in other languages, including 喜欢你 in Cantonese (recording) - it's actually a very good cover and his Cantonese pronunciation is >95% accurate - there are parts where you can't tell he's not a native speaker.

6. Musical Instruments

He's an accomplished classically-trained pianist, which you can see in...

JL MV (video, starting around 3:30 mark) - don't mind the makeup, it's from ages ago

Mr Mossie season 2 (video)

Love is Sweet (BTS video) - impromptu jazz, he was deciding which song to play

Fan thank you recording (video)

He also plays the guitar, though probably at an amateur level

7. Music Gaming

During college he was obsessed with this music game called O2Jam (劲乐团) to the point where he created new tracks (i.e. arrange/compose the music) for the company under the username Dinoroy (explained by himself here, videos of him playing).

He became well-known within the fan community as the legendary D神 (D God). There are a lot of funny comments from old players saying that they thought D God is a bitter middle-aged recluse trying to screw them over with difficult tracks (read comments here).

D God was so prolific and reliable that gaming company accepted his submissions without review. Here are some of his best tracks - game arrangement only (Lydia, Croatian Rhapsody, Digital Emotions), music & game arrangement (黑暗魅影), original composition (光之乐章)

8. League of Legends

He's an LOL super fan, commentator, and player since season 2, went to see worlds in person twice, and was a cast member in a gaming show called Beyond It! Hero (episodes here)

He played the 2018 All-Star Event in Las Vegas teaming with reigning world champion Rookie and delivered the final blow that beat the other team 2:1 (video)

He got a quadra kill at a celebrity mobile game even though his team was crap (video clip)

He co-invested 1M RMB in a team led by Misaya 若风 - you can see them playing together in a live broadcast of the mobile game (video)

Update: Our longtime fan boy has become spokesperson of League of Legends and official commentator at the Asian Games 2023 in Hangzhou! The love is reciprocated!

9. Calligraphy/Drawing/Culture

LYX is known for his Chinese handwriting (he practices regularly) - there's even a font based on his handwriting called 汉仪罗云熙体 (download here)

He does all his own handwriting for marketing materials (e.g. Immortality below) and doesn't need a hand double for scenes where his character is practicing ancient Chinese calligraphy

He's also got amazing drawing skills - check out the Queen of the Night 昙花 he drew as Runyu while waiting around on set in between takes (video)

While he doesn't go on a lot of variety shows, he's often a guest on cultural programs, like the beauty of Chinese Calligraphy 书法之美 (video), Chinese Fans in 指尖上的非遗 (video)

His self-produced Mr. Mossie covers a lot of cultural topics (seasons 1, 2, 3), the segment on Hanfu was featured in the UNESCO Chinese Language Video Festival (video)

10. Photography

Luo Yunxi is often seen taking photos on set with his top-of-the-line Leica camera. Here are some of the photos he has shared:

Here's a list of all of the reviews I posted for this project. I arranged them according to posting date as well as according to title.

By order of posting:

Our Dining Table by Mita Ori

Given (Volumes 1, 2, and 3) by Natsuki Kizu

My Summer of You (Volume 1: The Summer of You) by Nagisa Furuya

Our Dreams at Dusk: Shimanami Tasogare (Volumes 1 and 2) by Yuhki Kamatani

I Hear the Sunspot (Volume 1) by Yuki Fumino

Dekoboko Sugar Days by Atsuko Yusen

Restart After Coming Back Home by Cocomi

Sasaki and Miyano (Volumes 1, 2, and 3) by Shou Harusono

There Are Things I Can't Tell You by Edako Mofumofu

My Summer of You (Volume 2: The Summer with You) by Nagisa Furuya

Seaside Stranger (Volume 1: Umibe no Etranger) by Kii Kanna

Our Dreams at Dusk: Shimanami Tasogare (Volume 3) by Yuhki Kamatani

Koimonogatari: Love Stories (Volume 1) by Tohru Tagura

I Hear the Sunspot: Theory of Happiness by Yuki Fumino

Cherry Magic (Volumes 1, 2, and 3) by Yuu Toyota

Sasaki and Miyano (Volumes 4 and 5) by Shou Harusono

I Think Our Son Is Gay (Volumes 1 and 2) by Okura

Restart After Growing Hungry by Cocomi

I Cannot Reach You (Volumes 1 and 2) by Mika

Dekoboko Bittersweet Days by Atsuko Yusen

Koimonogatari: Love Stories (Volume 2) by Tohru Tagura

Until I Meet My Husband by Ryousuke Nanasaki and Yoshi Tsukizuki

I Think Our Son Is Gay (Volume 3) by Okura

Cherry Magic (Volumes 4 and 5) by Yuu Toyota

Would You Like to Be a Family? by Koyama

I Cannot Reach You (Volumes 3 and 4) by Mika

Sasaki and Miyano (Volume 6) by Shou Harusono

Anti-Romance (Volume 1) by Shoko Hidaka

Our Dreams at Dusk: Shimanami Tasogare (Volume 4) by Yuhki Kamatani

Seven Days by Venio Tachibana and Rihito Takarai

Hirano and Kagiura (Volume 1) by Shou Harusono

Hello, Green Days by Ayu Sakumoto

By title:

(If a series has multiple reviews, I'll be putting links to each of them in parentheses, and the title will link to the tag instead)

Anti-Romance by Shoko Hidaka

Cherry Magic by Yuu Toyota (Vols. 1-3, Vols. 4-5)

Dekoboko Sugar Days by Atsuko Yusen (Vol. 1, Vol. 2)

Given by Natsuki Kizu

Hello, Green Days by Ayu Sakumoto

Hirano and Kagiura by Shou Harusono

I Cannot Reach You by Mika (Vols. 1-2, Vols. 3-4)

I Hear the Sunspot by Yuki Fumino (Vol. 1, Vol. 2)

I Think Our Son Is Gay by Okura (Vols. 1-2, Vol. 3)

Koimonogatari: Love Stories by Tohru Tagura (Vol. 1, Vol. 2)

My Summer of You by Nagisa Furuya (Vol. 1, Vol. 2)

Our Dining Table by Mita Ori

Our Dreams at Dusk: Shimanami Tasogare by Yuhki Kamatani (Vols. 1-2, Vol. 3, Vol. 4)

Restart After Coming Back Home by Cocomi (Vol. 1, Vol. 2)

Sasaki and Miyano by Shou Harusono (Vols. 1-3, Vols. 4-5, Vol. 6)

Seaside Stranger by Kii Kanna

Seven Days by Venio Tachibana and Rihito Takarai

There Are Things I Can't Tell You by Edako Mofumofu

Until I Meet My Husband by Ryousuke Nanasaki and Yoshi Tsukizuki

Hello Anon-San! Thank you for this ask and your patience while you waited for me to answer. ^^

The part you're asking about is in the first chapter of vol 5. Yashiro has just discovered that Doumeki's impotence has been cured. He proposes having sex with Doumeki for the first time but D refuses so Y begins to basically taunt him while we get an inner monologue of Y trying to figure out exactly why he's so angry with D.

Here's the original transcript of Yashiro's inner monologue from pages 6-8 ch 23 for those who like to see the Japanese (I would just show the pages but I don't want my account to get flagged again 🥲):

脚に残る容赦のない手の感触 熱い舌の動き 思い出しては何度も疼いてた もう一度されたくてして欲しくて 頭ん中がそれで埋まんねぇようにしてた なのに俺は腹が立ってる 何に？いつから？ こいつを怖いと思うことに？ 世話してる振してたってことに？ したくねーとか言われたことに？ いや、それより前だ 俺で興奮なんかしちゃうこいつに？ そりゃおかしいだろう、だって俺は好きなんだ セックスが男とやるのが 実際俺だって感じまくってたろ

And here's my English translation:

The lingering feeling of those unforgiving hands on my legs The movements of that hot tongue Every time I remembered, throbbing [T/N with pleasure? pain?] again and again Wanting it to be done to me one more time Doing everything I could not to be buried by these thoughts Even so, I'm so angry At what? From when? At the fact that I think he's scary? At the fact that he pretended to "take care of me"? At the fact that he refused to have sex with me? No, it was before that At the fact that he got hard by thinking of me? No, that's strange, I mean, I like that Having sex with men Actually, I've also felt that arousal so many times, too, haven't I?

(T/N: Please keep in mind that I've never read the official June translation and this is just my interpretation of the original Japanese- I'm sure it's a little different from the other translations out there)

We see Yashiro scrambling through his thoughts, panic building as he tries to sort out his own feelings. The final thought he lands on is the fact that Doumeki got an erection at the thought of Y.

Yashiro has been doing sexual things with Doumeki all under the pretense that Doumeki's impotence provides a kind of safe space - there was no way that D could fuck Y violently or use Y's body for self-serving sexual gratification because D was impotent. No matter how much Yashiro may want violent sex with Doumeki, no matter how turned on, or desperate Y might be, Doumeki was forever unable to allow Yashiro to satisfy that self destructive urge because he was impotent.

The thought that this pretense has been not only torn apart in this moment, but that D had concealed this from Y and done sexual things with him is, in my opinion, what drives Y's dissociation at the beginning of the shower scene. I think other realizations start to pile on top of that as Y descends into a full panic attack.

Y sits in the shower as he recalls the "weird" thing Doumeki said just moments before - that D was truly attracted to Y and wanted to be by his side - and we get the iconic two page spread on (I think) pages 19-20 of Y recognizing the gravity of those words. Yashiro then starts to return to himself slightly as he builds a narrative in his mind that he then explains to Doumeki, who enters the shower at this point.

Yashiro says that he'd arbitrarily placed D in the same category as himself, similarly to what he had done with Kageyama. Because Doumeki was impotent he was "broken" in some way, like Yashiro perceives himself to be. This broken identity was what made Yashiro fall in love with Kageyama (Kage has a fetish for scars/scabs, if you recall). However, now that D is cured and no longer has this broken identity in Y's eyes, D has suddenly transformed into something else - something Y doesn't know how to deal with. Y then rationalizes that D was different from Kage from the start, that's why he could look at him "like that" - "with different eyes than him (Kage)".

Another thing that happens in this scene is Y admitting a fear of losing Doumeki (or rather, a fear of the fact that he can't stand losing D). Yashiro has become aware, if only vaguely or in a stunted way, that he cares for Doumeki. Y also heard from D moments earlier that D has feelings for Y, too. Yashiro is clearly totally unprepared for this sudden shift in his emotional landscape and I think this has a big role to play in his dissociation, as well.

So in short, Yashiro is suddenly confronted with a reality totally different from the safe one he has arbitrarily constructed about Doumeki as well as realizations about his own feelings about D. He's tackling feelings of betrayal, attraction, fear, and who knows what else. There are so many things coming to a head in Yashiro's mind at this moment that it leads to a dissociated response.

Also, as a side note, when Yashiro first wakes up in Doumeki's apartment (in ch 22 I think?) he makes a comment about the place looking like his childhood home. I think for those with trauma, being in a setting that's similar to the place where the trauma was experienced can prime a person to have anxiety or a dissociative episode. I think this also played a part in Yashiro's vulnerability throughout his time in D's apartment.

Check out the other posts for the rest of the chapters!

Check out the other posts for the rest of the chapters!

Check out the other posts for the rest of the covers!

Check out the other posts for the rest of the covers!

The perspective from 10,000 feet is exhilarating… the chapter titles read like a poem, not just a summary of the story but its concentrated mood. L’extrait de parfum.

Expect several posts to cover all chapters up to 54, as apparently I cannot add more pics here. Interestingly, not all chapters have their own covers - maybe a clue that they belong with the chapter before?

Hope this will make the wait for chapter 54 easier to bear! Enjoy the bittersweet beauty.

The @Guardian_Wishlist 2023 AO3 collection is live and all Wishlist gifts have been revealed!

There are 90 gifts - fic, art, meta, picspam, podfic, and more - in a range of fandoms! You can find them here:

on AO3: in the Guardian Wishlist 2023 AO3 collection

on DW: in comments on the all Wishlist posts (some gifts will only be here!)

Please take a look around and enjoy!

So many thanks to everyone who's been a part of this fest, whether you signed up or promoted or made gifts! You're the ones who made Guardian Wishlist work, and we're so happy you all joined in! We hope you had a great time. ♥ ♥ ♥

Two weeks till Guardian Wishlist reveals

Reminder that guardian_wishlist reveals are in two weeks, on 29 September (Reunion Festival).

If you've been meaning to take a look at the requests and make a little something or two, all wishlists are tagged for fandoms and media and open for receiving gifts. (Previous years' tags are labelled with their respective years, so check the plain fandom and media tags for this year's wishlists.) Wishlist comments are screened.

There are no assignments! Anyone can make gifts! Gifts must fit the requests and not include any DNWs. Prompts are optional. There are no minimums. Gifts must be unique to the recipient.

Link to the sneak peek under the cut, along with a translation 🫣

Two weeks till Guardian Wishlist reveals

Reminder that guardian_wishlist reveals are in two weeks, on 29 September (Reunion Festival).

If you've been meaning to take a look at the requests and make a little something or two, all wishlists are tagged for fandoms and media and open for receiving gifts. (Previous years' tags are labelled with their respective years, so check the plain fandom and media tags for this year's wishlists.) Wishlist comments are screened.

There are no assignments! Anyone can make gifts! Gifts must fit the requests and not include any DNWs. Prompts are optional. There are no minimums. Gifts must be unique to the recipient.

This must have taken hours of work and it’s just wonderful ✨

Thank you for your ask, Anon-san! And don't worry, there is no such thing as a stupid question, as they say. ^^ Here are those two pages from ch 53. I'll use the English translation I posted a while back.

Muraji cautions Doumeki against becoming too close to Yashiro and gives Doumeki an added nudge by reminding him that their boss, Tsunakawa, doesn't like Y.

D responds by saying he understands and that Yashiro is nothing more than a guest, even to Doumeki who has such an intense history with Y.

On the following page Doumeki is alone in the car, having finished his phone conversation with Muraji he waits for Yashiro and remembers what he'd just done with Y. In Japanese he says 「よく言うな」 which I have translated here to "What a lie" but the actual meaning is actually closer to "You say that so shamelessly" or something like that.

(Tangent 1: By the way - this is the exact same phrase Yashiro uses to Doumeki in ch 50 here:

When D tells him that his body is "truly hopeless". I talked about this part of ch 50 here if anyone is interested.)

Clearly Doumeki is telling Muraji a lie when he says Yashiro is nothing but a guest. Aside from the situation clearly not being one between a host and guest, I think Sensei is giving us a big hint that it's a lie through the angle she chooses to draw Doumeki from.

When Doumeki lies or is trying to conceal something Sensei tends to draw him facing away from us. For example in ch 1 when Yashiro says Doumeki must share two of his secrets because D knows two of Y's secrets. Doumeki says he thought Yashiro was very beautiful, but when Y presses D for a second secret D says he hasn't got any other secrets. This is a lie because Doumeki is still concealing his past with his father and sister at this point. Throughout the entire exchange Doumeki is drawn facing away from us, particularly in the frames where he's speaking.

Another example of this is the hospital scene in ch 13 when Doumeki gives Yashiro a blow job for the first time. At this point D's impotence has basically been cured and he's concealing his own sexual desire from Yashiro. Not the whole exchange, but significant parts are depicted with Doumeki's back to us, the readers.

(Tangent 2: For this same reason I think Doumeki is lying about having a woman 🫢 In the panel in ch 46 where he seemingly confirms to Yashiro that he's seeing a woman he's drawn with his back facing us, like this:

Y: I'm talking about a woman Y: There is one, isn't there? D: As expected D: You're very observant

I think Doumeki is letting Yashiro think he has a woman, maybe because he thinks it will make it less likely that Y will run away like the last time).

Anyway, so he's clearly lying to Muraji about Yashiro being a guest which then raises the question, well, what the hell is he to Doumeki? He must be more than a guest.