#yashiro

After the page from the second preview where doumeki collapses while trying to stand up

• Doumeki: "…S-sorry…"

• Yashiro: "It's fine. Don’t talk."

• Saying that, Yashiro puts Doumeki's arm around his shoulder and carries him to the bed

• Doumeki grabs Yashiro’s arm and says, "Don't go…" and then loses consciousness

• Yashiro prepares a towel for Doumeki's forehead and some water, and stays to nurse him

_____________

• Doumeki wakes up

• When he sits up, he sees Yashiro sleeping while seated against the wall

• Doumeki moves closer, notices the bucket of water nearby, and understands what happened.

• As he looks at Yashiro’s sleeping face, he recalls Kageyama's words and reaches out-

• but just then, his phone rings.

• The ringtone wakes Yashiro.

• Tsunakawa: "It's me."

• Doumeki: "…Yes."

• Tsunakawa: "Come to the main house. Now."

• Doumeki: "Understood."

• Yashiro looks up at Doumeki, who has lowered his gaze

• Yashiro asks if it was Tsunakawa calling

• Doumeki asks what Yashiro had originally come for

• Yashiro dodges the question

"What was it again?"

• He pretends he’s forgotten

• Yashiro then asks whether it was really okay to send the club mama who people think Doumeki is involved with home.

• Doumeki: "When did I ever say I was dating her?"

• Yashiro: "…You're not?"

• Doumeki’s wound starts to hurt, so he sits down and explains

 • The club mama is his childhood friend

• He was her tattoo practice model

• She was saving money at the club so she could become independent as a tattoo artist

• Yashiro: "I… see."

• Doumeki: "Would it have been more convenient if we were dating?"

• Yashiro: "…What do you mean by that?"

• Doumeki: "I wondered if that would make you feel more at ease."

• Yashiro: "At ease…? What are you talking about?"

• Doumeki: "Do you really not understand?"

• Yashiro: "It doesn’t matter to me either way. I don’t care who you’re dating as long as I can have sex, It doesn’t even have to be you"

• Doumeki: "I-"

(the scene shown in the first official preview.)

• Doumeki: "What if I told you that… I still have feelings for you?"

• Doumeki: "Do you want to know how I feel?"

"If I said I still love you, if you knew I’m still chasing after you"

• Doumeki: "Even so, do you still want to hear it from my own mouth?"

"Do you truly believe I could ever love anyone other than you?" (😭😭♥️) 

• They look at each other at the same eye level.

______________

Doumeki’s past

"Because you were there, I chose to live in this world."

"It didn’t matter which organization it was."

"I didn’t care if people thought I was disloyal or a terrible person."

"I decided I just wanted to exist in the same world as you any way I could."

"I wanted to become a man who could stand beside you."

"I didn’t care how many years it took."

"But I met you sooner than I expected, and I became greedy. I got jealous."

"I thought I had let those feelings go-" "but I couldn’t go against my own heart."

_______________

Back to the present

• Doumeki reaches out and touches Yashiro’s right cheek

• Doumeki: "Can you not see?"

• Yashiro: "…Why?"

• Doumeki: "Is it a lingering effect from back then?"

• Yashiro: "It's nothing serious."

• Doumeki: "Is it because of me?"

• Yashiro: "No."

• Yashiro grabs Doumeki’s wrist.

• Doumeki: "Even if it isn't…"

• Yashiro: "You’re overthinking it."

• Doumeki: "…Even so, to me, you are kind, strong, and beautiful."

• Yashiro: "…I-"

• Yashiro: "All this time, you’ve been making me listen to this"

"what kind of feelings did you expect me to hear it with…?"

• Doumeki leans in and kisses him.

• They part.

• Yashiro opens his eyes, stunned

• Doumeki stands up

• Yashiro: "You… why… why say it now?"

 "You hid it all this time"

 "why now?"

• Doumeki looks down at him silently,

• He takes his jacket and leaves

• Doumeki’s face turns serious

• Yashiro stares at the door.

_________________________________

✦ NENE YASHIRO ˚⋆𐙚｡ 𖦹.ᡣ𐭩˚

recolors OKAY .𖥔 ݁ ˖ HEART / REBLOG 2use

────୨ৎ────

act like this is my applogy for being inactive

With this body that’s frozen and about to break?

Your eyes and your warm voice

I long for it like crazy

Who waits for love, who waits for love

I don’t blame you for leaving me

Who waits for love, who waits for love

It’s my problem for loving you

One day, give me your hand too, turn around and look at me

Find me, just once

Find me, just once

I’ll wait so please come back

"I don't think gender matters when it comes to someone important"

It's really interesting how Kamiya echoes Yashiro's sentiments here.

Kamiya shared this chapter about his abuse at the hands of his father, heavily implying, too, that his sister died as a result of that same abuse. The parallels with Yashiro are obvious.

Kamiya tells Doumeki that he's lucky because he still has a family to go back to, and Tsunakawa, before this, questioned Doumeki about why he felt he couldn't get a regular job and live a normal life, given the circumstances surrounding his time spent in prison.

All of this mirrors what Yashiro tried to make Doumekie understand and accept before the time skip. None of the people in the Yakuza are as lucky as Doumeki. Yashiro in particular never had anyone growing up. An abusive step father and a mother who couldn't care less about him. He was totally alone, which is how he ended up being vulnerable to men like Misumi. But Doumeki has never been alone. He has a sister who loves him, and a mother who loves him too, despite her failings. I've said this before, but I think it's always particularly rankled Yashiro to see Doumekie essentially spurn the gift of a loving family, and instead decided to voluntarily join the Yakuza. It must be galling, because Yashiro never had a choice, and he probably couldn't understand why anyone would choose this life for themselves if they didn't have to. We see that same confusion in Tsunakawa and Kamiya.

It's just an interesting observation I made, and I wonder how it's going to play out through the rest of the story. I've had this idea in my head for a while that it isn't Yashiro, but Doumeki, who needs to learn a lesson about the importance of appreciating what you have. Thematically, it would make sense for Doumeki to end up being punished by the narrative for abandoning his family in pursuit of Yashiro, and I keep thinking the most dramatic way to drive that punishment home would be for Yashiro to die.

I'm probably totally wrong, lol, but it's just a theory of mine.

Either way, Yashiro is obviously going to go after Doumeki and try to save him. Doumeki's pretty much given up here, and no longer seems to have a will to live. Again, it would kind of make sense for him to watch Yashiro die in order to save his life, to jolt him out of his own, self-imposed misery, and to embrace the gift of a normal life and a loving family. More than anything, I think, that's what Yashiro always wanted for him, and in a way, it would be a way to honor Yashiro, to show the ultimate respect for him, by going back to a normal life.

Anyway, like I said, I'm sure I'm wrong, but something dramatic is definitely going to happen between Yashiro and Doumeki. I can't wait for the next chapter.

The opening pages are the conversation between Amou and Tsunakawa that was previewed officially.

Tsunakawa reminds Amou:

"You said that guy has nowhere to go back to, right?"

Amou apologizes.

Tsunakawa responds sarcastically:

 "Funny. Even the guy himself isn't apologizing."

Amou says he had hoped that during the past four years Doumeki would learn things like obligation and gratitude.

Tsunakawa replies:

 "Maybe he'll understand from here on."

Then Tsunakawa says:

 "Not that I'm bragging, but I've never devoted myself to another person. I can't understand it, and I don't want to."

Amou answers:

 "That probably has something to do with your upbringing."

Tsunakawa:

"But you understand it, don't you? That's why you brought him here."

A flashback panel shows a young Amou looking slightly embarrassed while Misumi rests a hand on his head.

Amou reveals that bringing Doumeki to Tsunakawa was a personal favor he asked of him, and Tsunakawa only accepted it because they were old acquaintances.

As Amou leaves, he tells Tsunakawa:

 "You can count it as a debt I owe you."

But once in the car he thinks:

 "He's absolutely going to make me pay him back later."

Then they arrive at their destination.

---

Yashiro and Nanahara

Back at the office.

Yashiro returns visibly irritated.

Nanahara approaches him.

While covering part of his face with one hand, Yashiro complains that they still haven't found Kai's hideout.

Nanahara asks:

"Were you maybe going to see Doumeki?"

Yashiro immediately shoots him a sharp look, throws an ashtray at his head, and snaps:

"Don't stick your nose into this."

Nanahara pushes back.

He says:

Ever since Doumeki appeared, Yashiro has been acting strange.

Maybe Doumeki said something to him.

He's not stupid; he can put things together.

He was the last person who spoke to Doumeki four years ago.

Then Nanahara reveals:

"Back then, he said that if he wasn't in this world anymore, he'd no longer have any connection to you."

At first Nanahara thought Doumeki had simply changed after joining the Sakura family.

But now he realizes:

"That wasn't it. It was because of that, wasn't it?"

Yashiro tries to brush it off:

"Who knows? It has nothing to do with me."

Nanahara continues:

"Then why are you so miserable?"

Yashiro:

"I'm just tired. What, are you trying to tell me what to do now?"

Nanahara says he isn't.

He only thinks that maybe Doumeki no longer has anywhere he belongs.

Maybe someone should help him.

Yashiro cuts him off:

"Nobody can help him."

Then Yashiro says:

"Ignoring Tsunakawa's pride, pretending I forgot him, throwing him away just so he could stay in the same world as me... how is that any different from obsession?"

At that moment,

Amou appears.

---

Amou and Yashiro

The two talk at a café.

The dialogue isn't shown, but Amou apparently explains how Doumeki came to be under Tsunakawa's care.

Yashiro says he understands now, though he's genuinely surprised.

Then he asks Amou:

"Why did you go so far as to help Doumeki behind Misumi's back?"

Amou begins talking about his relationship with Misumi.

He explains:

Misumi married Amou's mother.

They were never legally adopted.

Misumi offered to pay his living expenses and tuition, but Amou refused and graduated university through his own efforts.

It was at university that he met Tsunakawa.

Amou says he always admired Misumi.

Even though he understood why Misumi never adopted him, he still wanted to become family.

He wanted to exist in the same world as him.

So instead of becoming a yakuza, he became Misumi's secretary. (After Misumi finally gave in.)

Amou says:

"I wanted to be someone like a son to him... the way you are."

Yashiro immediately replies:

"People don't sleep with their sons."

Then Amou asks the crucial question:

"Four years ago, when you abandoned Doumeki... was it for his sake? Or for your own?"

Yashiro freezes in shock.

Seeing his reaction, Amou stands up and leaves.

Beside Yashiro's seat, rain has begun to strike the window.

---

Yashiro gets a phone call.

Someone asks:

"Where are you right now?"

Heavy rain is falling.

Yashiro walks through it without an umbrella.

A car suddenly stops beside him.

Then, 

"Don't move. Do you know how long I've been looking for you?"

It's Kamiya.

Kamiya says:

"I don't understand what's so great about you."

"That stubborn bastard is completely wrapped around your finger. Either you're incredible in bed, or you're unbelievably compatible."

"Either way, only a weirdo would go this far."

Yashiro keeps walking.

Kamiya continues:

"You must really be worth enough to throw a man's whole life into chaos."

Still no reaction.

Finally Kamiya clicks his tongue.

"Say something, damn it. You're disgusting."

Then he throws a hotel key at Yashiro's back.

Yashiro stops and glances over his shoulder.

Kamiya says:

"'His reason for living'... that's what you are."

"Aren't you embarrassed?"

Then:

"The night after tomorrow, Kai gets killed. After serving prison time for it, he'll be expelled from the organization."

"If he only comes to his senses when he's an old man, he'll be completely screwed."

Then Kamiya drives away.

Yashiro stands there.

The hotel key lies on the wet ground.

He closes his eyes and looks up at the rainy sky.

---

The Hotel

The scene shifts.

Doumeki is in the hotel room handling his gun.

The doorbell rings.

He opens the door.

Standing there is Yashiro, soaked by the rain.

Doumeki is stunned.

Without saying a word, Yashiro places a hand against his face and leans in himself.

Then... 

He kisses him (❗❗❗❗❗) 

Doumeki's eyes remain open in shock.

Yashiro closes his eyes and kisses him desperately, completely absorbed in it.

They move inside the room.

Their lips part once.

They stare at each other.

Then, 

Doumeki firmly wraps his arms around Yashiro.

Yashiro loops both arms around Doumeki's neck.

And they kiss again.

--------------------------------------