Mangled corpse of cave man 8000 years old grasping primitive samsung phone discovered in croatian bog soil

apparently everyone is sick of my shit and they’re going to kill me tomorrow. idk it’s just what I heard

she nothing on my nothing til i nothing. celibacy

its so sweet to me whenever a reconstruction of a neanderthal's face shows up on social media and people are like "oh they would have loved minecraft" "they would have loved weed brownies" it's so sweet. i hope that continues on to the next stage of human evolution. i want whoever comes next to dig me up, reconstruct my face, and for the girlbloggers of this far-flung civilization to go "duuuude she would have loved churfing back a freefing zarbee"

party rockers in their bed tonight. every body just have a good night

and we wont let the bed bugs bite. we just wanna see you... sleeping

Tip: you can microwave stale croissant for 15-20 seconds and it will become soft and warm and nice. Cut it open, put butter in it. Peace and love

Tip: you can refrigerate stale croissant for 3-6 hours and it will become mushy and cold and unpleasant. It won't cut well, so just put a big clump of cold, hard butter on it. Strife and hatred.

Tip: you can do nothing to a stale croissant for any arbitrary length of time and it will remain as is. Do not cut it, or add butter. Stasis and stagnation.