ALEX

(a bell rings, reminding me of previous times i have eaten) these memories are so good… might as well salivate. it’s my choice.

older siblings deserve financial compensation

nunchucks are illegal in some states but guns are not. so if you tie two guns together and create gunchucks it’s neither legal or illegal

schroedinger’s gunchucks

my cat, for no goddamn reason at all except that he’s a cat and he can do whatever the fuck he wants: what if i just run at this wall, do a sick kickflip, scare myself with the sound it makes, and then proceed to run over your sleeping body? would that be fucked up or what

one of the reasons i like greek mythology because the greeks went “yes these are our gods. they’re very powerful and can not die and are incapable of any sort of critical thinking.” 

u will never have gf u are just a portly boy in a sailor suit carrying a huge lollipop

*the jigsaw puppet rides by you on his tricycle and rings a little bell. he is going to school*

sicko mode……… Take me home