Maybe I'm just meant to be alone.

I enjoy online university, I really do. I know a lot of people have difficulties with it which I can understand but imo it’s just so much more chill. Except for the consultations. If you’re a prof and offering them then please, I beg you, write how you’re gonna contact me and don’t let me sit here all anxious not knowing whether I should write you a mail or just wait? Heck, give me an instruction manual. You’re really not furthering my mental health

I just found this blog again so I might start posting here again. Which... will be right now actually

I've just been at an initiative meeting for a Play Festival for video games. We were presented the different tasks we could work on and I couldn't decide. Now I'm unsatisfied with the answer I gave and I feel hella anxious. I'm currently on the train with my friend who permanently talks to me and I just really don't feel like answering. I have a major headache, feel dizzy and sick and am so close to a sensory overload. I feel like breaking down and crying.

My depressions been acting up lately. Can't gather my motivation to do anything. Today's a holiday and my fridge is empty. I'm 3 weeks behind studying for uni. The last time I cleaned my flat is 2 weeks ago. I'm sleep deprieved on uni days but the last 24 hours i still slept over 12 hours. How do I snap out of this.

I don’t understand a single thing in that text I’m reading for my seminary rn. It just enters my brain and??? Where does the information go?!??

Belittering...

I just fought with my friend because I care for her and want her to stay healthy since she’s dealing with some sleep issues. She didn’t want to hear anything of it and got plain rude to me. Now she’s upset and I am as well. Not to mention that I felt like shit even before that since the person who asked to date me is suddenly engaged and uni started again. I’m shivering and just wanna cry. Everythings too much for me right now.

How is it possible to be rude to someone and baffle at them when the only thing they’re trying to do is to show affection and caring about them

Could my mental illness be so kind and not make me have a mental breakdown rn? Haven’t had one in months and now is practically the worst time.

Can’t tell wether she’s flirting or affectionate or seeing me as a little sister.

I really love, that i can manipulate most people so easily. I just wish I were more extroverted so i could take better advantage of that.

When uni stuff is stressing you out ‘cause you’ve worked the past four hours on it so you decide to procrastinate by writing with people but it ends up being too many people so you can’t keep track and end up stressed out.

When you ask your friend a rather simple question about some organizational stuff about your shared Minor and it ends up becoming a rumour, passing along to every first semester student and back to you from the exact same friend you asked.