The Shrieking of Innumerable Gibbons

Jesus spent a month in the desert smoking fake carts with his androooooid charger

He got mad as helllll

Turns out getting pissed off at inanimate objects refusing to work properly is a feeling that extends into the animal kingdom

Fuck just imagine eating a blueb that’s bigger than your mouth. Imagine eating a whole hot tub full of them.

Anything can be a potion if it’s liquid and has Effect

soup is a potion, the effect varies depending on how hot it is when you throw it

you understand

they should invent a loneliness that’s bearable

My doctor says my powers are going to start manifesting soon in a really dark and twisted way and that he’s scared because he cant know what might happen

He also said that I have the prostate of a seventy year old man. I’m 26

When it comes to food, a smidgen is like a thin horizontal line, whereas a dab is more circular , an enhanced dot

You show a cat something and they're like sniff sniff sniff sniff sniff sniff sniff ooooh I understand now. Don't care