Eatin’ Dirt

this is so freaking sad reblog

what is it about pussy that needs ice. like it's a match made in heaven. even if it was in the fridge before i still pour it over ice

so i meant, and fully thought i typed, pepsi

pussy was invented after electric refrigeration unlike cock which was originally meant to be enjoyed at room temperature

Stumbles out of google docs covered in blood

COCK ? BALLS? DICK? NUTS????

It’s always “why did you go out in the storm” and “your soaking wet” and never How was the storm The storm looked fun was it fun

today one of the student workers at my job told me that if she’s struggling remembering something important in her course work she’ll wait until her professor asks a question related to that topic during a lecture and then she’ll purposefully raise her hand and answer it wrong because, and I quote, ‘the combined shame and embarrassment of getting an answer wrong in front of more than a hundred of your peers will make sure that you’ll never forget what the right answer actually was’ and if that is not the most next level balls to the wall bonkers extrovert thing I’ve ever heard then I don’t know what is

ACTUALLY acting silly is one of the greatest joys of life. if you see me in the street meowing back at cats I see and kicking snow piles down know that I am living my best life.

Born ridiculous, Forced to have opinions on the economy 😔