The Bear Patch

I went to a festival over new year’s eve, last/this year. ‘17/’18 I took acid for the first time, which was quite the experience, and had a couple of awesome personal realisation moments, chief among them was the realisation that I haven’t really been building a discernible persona/style. This is probably partly due to my affinity for rejecting the material (all buddhist like). Tthe realisation was that people, humans, are at least partly physical (having physical bodies), and during our lifetimes physical objects have importance in that they can become things like totems, or relics, or reflect aspects of our personalities. I had been thinking about this idea before about building an identity, but more in a metaphysical sense. The idea of tailoring one’s personality and self into exactly what you want it to be, (which is what gave me the idea of making the rainbow word portrait.)

(In conclusion: Soul is Seed. Spirit is seat for Seed, and accumulated body of life experiences. Physical body is seat for spirit, and energy source. As far as I can tell, our purpose here is to learn and grow.)

I have always been interested in the mechanics of spirituality, it was never enough for me to accept we have a spirit and energy flowing through us and all that hippie philosophy stuff, I wanted to know how the spirit was, I wanted to understand it in a logical, practical sense. During the many philosophical discussions I had with my housemates, I came to my current definition of how I believe the soul, spirit and body interact, in life and after.

During the first trimester of pregnancy, our physical body develops, during the second our spiritual or energetic body develops and intertwines with the physical, during the third is when the soul is brought into the bodies and integrates itself, gets comfortable and learns the controls necessary to support it’s own life after birth (breathing and pumping the heart and stuff)

The Soul, in my opinion, is not our mind or consciousness, it is a seed of individuality. It is like the number you input into the equation of a maths problem, the starting point of who you are, the equation is your physical and spiritual body. From this seed, your consciousness and self grows into and from the spiritual and physical bodies. The seed is the core of who you are, the spiritual body is the expression of core growing using the experiences you go through, throughout your life. The physical body is a seat or suit for the seed and spirit to ride in through your life on the physical plain.

Your physical body is part of the earth, part of the planet. It was literally and physically grown from the planet. So to was the spiritual body. In Paulo Coelho’s book The Alchemist, he describes the planet having a soul, and all things have a piece of the soul of the planet, just as they have a piece of the matter of the planet.

It is with this definition that we can understand how we are and how reincarnation is. We are shaped by our experiences, they make us, but it is not all we are, we must have a starting point, the Soul Seed. We are not just perpetual equations, where every sensory input has a predetermined outcome, if that were so it would be possible to predict everything that ever was and everything that will ever be, by following the patterns. No, our center, our seed is the spark of individuality and freedom that allows us to choose. Sure we all have paths before us that we must walk in someway, but we choose whether to learn from our experiences or not.

So throughout our lives lives our Seed is at the heart of our accumulated spiritual body, built by experiences. The soul seed takes in new lessons learnt, and saves the core message of the lesson. Should the connection between all three bodies be strong, larger pieces of information can be transferred, such as whole experiences, memories or life stories. Such as monks who reach enlightenment in multiple lives, they can recall things from previous lives.  At death, the physical body cannot produce the energy required to hold the Seed and the Spirit in the body, and the connection is broken and the bodies begin to separate. The energetic body slowly is slowly incorporated back into the soul of the planet, the seed, after learning all it could in this life, moves onto where it came from to begin the process again. Where the Seed comes from is a mystery to me, perhaps it is a piece of the soul of the universe, but this does not seem congruent to me.

In conclusion: Soul is Seed. Spirit is seat for Seed, and accumulated body of life experiences. Physical body is seat for spirit, and energy source. As far as I can tell, our purpose here is to learn and grow.

My mother is a very strong independent woman. She is caring and supportive and has endeavored to let me discover my own way in the world. As I child I respected her so much that most requests she made of me I just accepted, and so there was never any need for me to rebel. Recently I have realized that a lot of big decisions I had made in my life were actually still the decisions my mother had made and I had just accepted them as my own. During a groundbreaking discussion I started with my mother last night regarding about how it is almost impossible to criticize her about anything without her becoming upset and angry, I had a break through moment where I was finally able to express myself and how I felt, and cried properly for the first time in years. During this part of the discussion, my mum admitted that she was at a fault and accepted that she would try to improve on this. This was a first, as I have mentioned she would always respond to criticism with hurt, anger and denial.