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Hi Wiggly, I’m Lex

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Thorin's terms of endearment: My heart, my one, my treasure of treasures
Bilbo's terms of endearment: you idiot, you sap, silly Dwarf, daft King
Shane has a humidifier, he can’t sleep without in the winter- when Ilya sees it for the first time he of course has to tease the shit out of shane, about even needing fancy air. Ilya calls it his “bedroom vape” Shane calls Ilya stupid. He carries on about Shane’s addiction, complains about the smoke (echoing complaints Shane has made about Ilya’s cigarettes before) One night he walks in to their room from brushing his teeth and places his hand over the steam pluming out and sighs and says “I wish you would quit baby 😔 don’t make me a widow” and Shane just says “Ilya” and places his hand over Ilya’s face and his big 32 teeth smile
number one rule! never believe ur thoughts after 10 pm . unless its about The Character then believe all of your thoughts wholeheartedly
Don’t know what’s better, Thorin knowing that Dwalin likes Nori and they both have deep grumpy yearning conversations about their loves, or Thorin having absolutely no clue about it at all and Dwalin and Nori have a whole ass courtship going on during the quest. Thorin doesn’t find out until they reclaim Erebor and Dwalin and Nori kiss in celebration and he’s like “?!!!????!”

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The royal signet ring of the House of Durin is a massive piece of solid gold and heavy iron, used to stamp molten wax on official decrees. It is far too large for a Hobbit's hand. One evening, while Thorin is working late, Bilbo playfully slips the giant ring onto his thumb, where it immediately wobbles and slides off. Thorin catches it before it hits the floor. Instead of putting it back on his own finger, Thorin takes a soft leather cord, threads the heavy royal seal through it, and gently ties it around Bilbo’s neck. To the guards outside, seeing the Consort wear the King’s actual seal around his neck is the ultimate statement: Bilbo holds the power to speak for the King himself
My Favorite Running Leverage jokes/bits
"It's a very distinctive (insert thing here)"
"There's something wrong with you" - said to either Hardison or Parker
Sophie and Nate bickering like an old married couple
Hardison weaponizing people's racism/other bigotry for the con
"Let's go steal a (blank)"
any time Eliot and Hardison are on screen together
Almost every male mark being INCREDIBLY down bad for Sophie within seconds
ilya being in a period of Bad depression and between playing games and going to practice he doesn't really have the energy to do much else and he just kind of collapses when he gets home and he hasn't shaved in days and his hair is unruly and he just feels kinda gross and ugly but doesn't have the energy to do anything about it so shane is like Not On My Watch so he drags ilya into the tub and washes his hair with his special curly shampoo and carefully shaves his face and lathers him in too much body lotion which means he has to stand stark naked in the bathroom for 10 minutes before he can put clothes on and shane tries his best to do his curly hair routine for him he gets the special towel and the curl cream and his eyebrows furrow in concentration as he scrunches ilya's curls to the best of his abilities and ilya sits on the toilet lid with tears in his eyes

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Fat baby Shane in a pumpkin costume waddling from house to house with his parents for his first trick or treat
average nate-centric leverage episode: grief & drinking & catholic guilt & maybe sterling is there also
average parker-centric episode: another incredibly traumatic piece of her backstory is revealed
average sophie-centric episode: oops she lied/manipulated/kept secrets too much & backed herself into a corner
average hardison-centric episode: hardison gets into a Situation TM
average eliot-centric episode: what if we made eliot a minor celebrity. again.
Psych is such a weird show bc in a lot of ways it's constantly asking, "can you forgive your father? even tho he could never forgive you, can you forgive him?" and the thing he could never forgive you for was not meeting his exact very specific expectations. And the answer keeps being yes you can, because not doing so is worse. You tried and it hurt more. You tried and it made you more miserable. You forgive him because he's all you have most of the time, and its somehow less complicated than whatever you have going on with your mom. You can forgive him but you can't forget, and then one day he realizes that he was wrong and there was nothing he should have taken as a slight about you, but you both just never acknowledge this paradigm shift in your relationship bc it'd be more awkward then fighting again for the millionth time. So things get better but you never say why, you never acknowledge it unless forced and somehow you forgive him more than your mom who you were never even half as mad at.
But also it's about breaking and entering into sea world and making a janitor think you killed your best friend so you can escape, it's about gaslighting your coworkers into thinking you are the dumbest man alive, it's about only closing a mystery when it's as funnt as possible and making sure everyone else around you is as baffled as possible. It's about childhood and nostalgia and growing up in the most chaotic way you can. It's about people being killed with a t-rex skull, it's about slapstick and committing to the bit and being the silliest messiest bisexual on tv in 2006-2014.
It's about a son and his father and forgiveness and somehow also they are in a circus tent trying to find out why a corpse was launched from a cannon. And also there's an extended musical episode that makes it onto my personal Spotify year after year

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I see we're giving Shane a peanut allergy. As someone married to someone with a peanut allergy please let me tell you that Ilya would be SO STRESSED all the time. He would ask more often than Shane if the dish has peanuts in it. He has benedryl in one pocket and nasal spray in the other. He makes eye contact with the waitress and says, so slow and deliberate that his accent is almost nonexistant, "Are there peanuts in this dish? My husband is extremely allergic to peanuts. You cannot prepare this dish on any surface that has touched peanuts." If he eats peanut butter in the house he yells "PEANUTS PEANUTS PEANUTS" and puts everything directly into the dish washer and then goes into the garage to eat his peanut butter toast. Which he does still eat occasionally. Because he really loves peanut butter.
Leverage S03E08 The Boost Job.