carb queen

Chaotic good.

That shit hurts 😂 ya whole class period ruined

my grandmother died having only used her china like twice in her life. during the year or so before her death, she was starting to package up and give things of hers to her kids, and gave mom the china while sighing “oh i wish i had used the china more!” and mom tried so hard to convince her to just keep it, then, and eat corny dogs off it if she wanted. she insisted she couldn’t possibly, you need a special reason to use the fine china. when nana died, we used her fine china as our everyday dishes for years. i was 18 when she died, and never really stopped having that in the back of my head. now, when i hear myself say “i wish i had a reason to wear/do/eat/use X!” i hear nana regretting never really using her china. and let me tell you a thing: spaghettios taste great when eaten from fine china.

Treat yourself

if you’re ever trying to get to know a person on a date or whatever, find out when they like to get to the airport. i guarantee it speaks volumes about them. some people know they have a flight at eleven and go, “should i go get breakfast beforehand? i have my boarding pass on my phone, right?” others are like, “i have a car coming to get me at 4:30. i don’t know how long it’ll take to check in and walk down two hallways, better give myself six hours. what? dinner the night before? i can’t. i’m in a whole other mindset right now. i have to weigh a suitcase, take out a sweater, and then weigh it four more times. i have two hard copies of my boarding pass, i emailed it to myself, i have it on my phone, it’s also tattooed to my chest.”

I had a dream I was watching keeping up with the kardashians and Kylie had gotten cyborg legs like they had taken the legs of an AT-ST from Star Wars and put them on her lower half so she was like 11 feet tall and Kim was like “I think Kylie’s new legs are SO fun..”