I didn’t even know mischief had feet!!

“my father is a boy and my mother is a girl so i’m mixed” is the funniest possible response to someone asking your gender and it came from 6’5 Viking footballer and notable weird little guy Erling Haaland on a Snapchat

i wish we were able to talk about women's rights without someone mentioning how much they do or don't want to have sex with them. i don't care if you're a lesbian Stop finding worth in women purely from their perceived attractiveness

"I think women should not be expected to shave for societal respect / to avoid discrimination" "yeah🤤 i love bush" ok well that's not what we're talking about is it.

i hate how many posts about trans women deserving respect always devolve into "I love girldick" or "trans rights but I don't want to date a trans person" because that's entirely unrelated to the topic at hand. you should not respond to feminism with "YESSS I loveeee you because I see you as nothing but a sex object" you people sound like other men I get stuck talking with that end up saying "free the nipple so I can see boobies in public" and thinking they're feminists. why can't we just respect women regardless of your attraction to them or not. why does it need to be brought up in every conversation regarding their rights

this might come across as anti capitalist but,,,,,, i want to enjoy life

this might come across as anti capitalist but,,,,, i want everyone to enjoy life

I’m so proud of senshi for making it so far in the tumblr sexyman poll. I think it’s so beautiful that tumblr has reached a point where a short fat hairy bearded man is the pinnacle of sexuality for a large swath of this userbase. it’s like when you see before & after pictures of a rainforest recovering from deforestation. nature is healing and we can fight god

I hope he wins so someone will have to explain to ryoko kui what a tumblr sexyman is

I have to say I forgot the onceler’s thing was cutting down trees when I made my metaphor.

the forest is also a metaphor for his bush

how does this post have almost 20k notes and senshi isn’t even winning. the poll is not over he needs your help!!!!!! do it for the fat boys

I thought I had accidentally deleted this and just about died man THIS IS MY LEGACY.

what I've learned from having other people edit my work is that I have a sick addiction to commas

there have been four editing passes on my spider sex book, and each time they take away so many commas. no fresh commas are being added, this is just a continued culling. if you see a comma in the final book please understand that it survived so much

if as a transmasc you want to be tall, then say you want to be tall. if you want to be feminine then be feminine. if you want to be thin say you want to be thin. if you want to be alt then be alt. if you want to have a penis say you want to have a penis. just say which physical traits you want to have (preferably on your own post) and stop saying you want to “have the gender” of whichever trans woman’s selfies you’re commenting on. her gender is female and you would explode if you had to deal with even a fraction of the things she’s dealing with

i’m sure i’ve said it before but i really think that when transmascs say they “want the gender” of whichever woman they’re looking at what they really mean is that they want to be a feminine person with a penis, which is both achievable and should be achieved, but projecting this desire onto trans women is pretty disgusting actually, considering those aren’t what qualifies her gender, she might not even enjoy having whichever traits you’re pining after, and you will not have and do not want her gender anyway

"okay, but are you a nonbinary woman or a nonbinary man" im going to nonbury you in a fucking hole.

every evening i run to move the deodorant can on my desk from its spot when the sun gets near it because i have visions of it exploding from the heat of the sun and also igniting the nearby bottle of nail polish remover causing a giant fire in my room that kills me like im a final destination character

other ways i think i would probably die in a final destination movie: - dough hook on stand mixer flies off while kneading and stabs me in the head - accidentally inhaling bong water and somehow drowning - bus crash on the way to dublin airport sends me flying over o'connell street and i am impaled on the spire - i fall into the sea and can't swim back up due to large heavy statement earrings - electrocuted by my nintendo ds while playing pokemon during a thunderstorm

no, that last one is how you end up transported into a pokemon game and can't escape until you defeat the champion trainer who is played by the same actor who plays your dad

hey! HEY! *draws gun* keep your hands where i can hold 'em