texts from the crow club

(267): So before we go on this mission how reliable are you for bailing people out of jail

(706): The only times we have to apologize in this friendship is when you intentionally punch me and that’s only happened once so it’s okay

(504): Who says no to sex and donuts?!

(914): and i mean that in the cutest, flirtiest way possible

(646): I feel like my life has just been one 21 year long episode of “i shouldn’t be alive”

(412): Dude, it’s not gay. It’s winter.

(847): there may or may not be knives in your bed. I would check

(949): We are bad people. This is why we are friends. <3

(856): I don’t have any soul left to be crushed.

(603): Someone said we’re out of ice. You collapsed on the spot and started sobbing, saying ‘but where will all the polar bears live”. That drunk.

(1-804): Bad choice

(847): Decisions were made. The quality of them will be judged tomorrow

(226): It’s easy for me to be professional, the tough part is finding the perfect amount of bitchy undertone

(443): Wipe that smile off your face.

(571): i really love you but i feel kinda dumb about it

(610): I mostly blame me being such a miserable fuck on the fact that I was born on a Monday.

(803): Now would be a good time to set your alarm to pick me up from jail in the morning.