Einhornkotze

the version of you from five years ago would be genuinely amazed by what you’ve handled since then. sit with that for a second

if you vote me for president i vow to make everything the ocean again. no more land only ocean. this will solve all of our problems and replace them with new, far more interesting problems

btw it's so fucking stupid you can be anxious physically in your body even after you've decided mentally you don't care. I'm supposed to be in charge here

I'm just saying, if you're going to worldbuild magic being a "raw, primal force, akin to and interweaving with nature itself" you gotta explain to me why animals don't use it

I know the normal answer is "they just aren't smart enough for it" but idk I've seen enough media where a character uses a spell in a moment of brain-off panic ilI feel like animals could probably stumble into a spell or two like, accidentally

Also how funny would it be to see a completely normal regular bear cast magic missile outta nowhere

Dogs can also cast Magic Missile but every time they do the projectile is shaped like a bone or a stick and they chase after it

group of wizards who ask this in-universe, and after extensive study learn to their surprise that animals are casting spells all the time, just that their magic is so fundamental as to be unrecognizable to humans. turns out the only reason acorns grow on trees is because squirrels keep wishing for them.

Can we stop with the character development. Where's my beach episode.

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I think the british really popped off with "bloody" as an expletive but unfortunately I can't say it out loud in real life or I sound like a teeaboo from 2012

TIL "Teeaboo"

remember to bury the dead with a phone, everyone. these days the ferry terminal at the river styx wants you to download a fucking app

it’s monday i’m in the labyrinth

it’s tuesday i’m in the evil lab

it’s wednesday i’m in the time loop

it’s thursday i’m in the medieval torture apparatus

🌸it’s friday i’m in love🌸

its Samstag, today kommt das Sams :)

went for a walk the other day and there were apples and blackberries growing along the trail and i walked past some teenagers smoking weed in a ditch and overheard one of them point to the fruits and say "bro that shit is bountiful"

on wege eode on sume dæge and wæs æppla and blace berian growende ymb þæm pæþe and ic eode bi geoguþum smociende weod on dice and hyrde an bicnode to wæstmum and cwæþ "leof se scitel bið cystig"