the hate yourself change

class of 2013 by mitski

she looks like the secondary protagonist of a jane austen novel. spends a lot of time reading and is very close with her (also unmarried) female friends. 8/10

she’s a farmer’s daughter or a huntress. hair is impractically left down but when she aims her bow and arrow at you she’s too damn gorgeous. 7/10

looks like the one woman in the group of guys for an action movie. has a lot of impressive martial arts scenes with way too many cuts that leaves you feeling horny and disrespected at the same time. 6/10

she’s definitely an elder for the younger lgbts in minas tirith, and strong enough to beat the shit out of any homophobe, transphobe, etc. 8/10

these are the same picture. 4/10

she’s the younger sister of the main love interest, always knows what’s going on  and ready to pop in with a witty comment. 7/10

would. 9/10

this looks like cate blanchett kind of? 6/10

her name was Natalia Smüt Lopez - she was a drag performer and a force to be reckoned with on the bay area scene.

she has left behind a family struggling to pay for funeral costs and many expenses.

ways you can help:

gofundme organized by her family

donate directly to her sister:

cash app: $ne55a7

venmo: Vanessa-Singh-7

So I wasn’t really taught to brush my teeth every day as a kid. So I didn’t. I got to be an adult and realized “hmm teeth are expensive I need to start brushing them” and brushing my teeth twice a day has been on my actual to do list every single day of my college career. It’s a habit I needed to build.

Have I successfully done it? Absolutely not. I’m pretty good about doing it at least once a day, but some days it just doesn’t happen. It’s not that I forget usually, I just had some aversion I couldn’t figure out, until last week.

I’m at the grocery store, in the toothpaste aisle with my roommate, and I complain about how much I hate mint. I FUCKING HATE THE TASTE OF MINT. The taste and the smell, any kind of minty thing in any form, I HATE IT. But literally every “adult” toothpaste in the aisle was some type of minty disgusting nonsense. And my roommate was like “you know you could like get kids’ toothpaste? You like bubblegum right?”

And y’all, it was like the clouds parted. I got some strawberry bubblegum kids’ toothpaste. I brushed my teeth with it and it was a whole new experience. I have successfully brushed twice a day every day since, because the mental block I had towards it is gone! 

I thought my lack of brushing was just a moral failing on my part; I was too lazy, too undisciplined, to build a good habit. But really? I just hate the taste of mint so much I didn’t want to brush my teeth.

This made me realize that when presented with a change you want to make, a habit you want to build, if you’re encountering resistance in yourself, you should lean into that resistance and really investigate what’s causing it, then work on accommodating that. 

Say you hate washing dishes so they pile up and then you’re overwhelmed by how many you have to do. Why do you hate it? Deep down, what about it do you dislike? Is touching wet food super gross for you? Try thick rubber gloves while you’re washing. Does the sound of dishing clanking together grate your nerves? Do them with headphones in and turned up loud. Do you hate the smell? Light some candles, spray some air freshener. 

Do these things instead of gritting your teeth and forcing yourself, then ultimately failing and getting discouraged by your “lack of self-discipline”