TeaPot Princess' Land of Tea

[Chevalière d’Éon, right, dueling with Saint Georges, left. Her sword can be seen striking her opponent.]

Chevalière d’Éon (born 1728) was assigned male at birth. She presented as a man for forty-nine years, and as a woman for thirty-three years. d'Eon held a variety of professions during her life including being a spy, a dragoon captain, and an author. When d'Éon demanded that the French government recognize her as female King Louis XVI and his court granted her request. d’Éon was an avid fencer. She dueled throughout her life. For a time d’Éon toured England with another female fencer, actress and friend Mrs. Bateman, and made fencing her primary means of income. During 1787 the Prince of Wales arranged a match between d’Éon and Monsieur de Saint George, a master fencer acquainted with d’Éon, at Carlton House in London. While d’Éon did not win this match she did show off her skill by striking Saint George with a “coup de temps”, meaning she managed to hit Saint George during the preparation of his attack.

The Bechdel:

two or more women talking to each other about something other than a man

The Mako Mori:

at least one female character with her own narrative arc that is not about supporting a man’s story

The Sexy Lamp:

a female character that cannot be removed from the plot and replaced with a sexy lamp without destroying the story.

Chef’s Specials:

The Anti-Freeze:

no woman assaulted, injured or killed to further the story of another character.

The “Strength is Relative”:

And generates at least one that I think ought to be added:

The Pizza Night Test

I’m 6’2 and weigh 180lbs

Or if you’d like to have some more options….

     omg. okay, so basically, I was a “gifted kid” which was code for fucken nerd ass bitch, so i would constantly just stare off into space during class while everyone else was tryna figure out what the fuck our teacher was tryna say. Anyway, I was learning about chemistry and biology outside of school(i know what a fucking nerd amirite ladies), and my dad got me a book that talked about all these famous psychological experiments.

    So chapter one was, would you have guessed it, Pavlov’s dog. I thought it my be fun to try something to that extent with my classmates. Now, keep in mind, being a nerdy ass brown kid in a school full of white ppl meant that I wasn’t exactly popular, and no one really talked to me in class or cared what I was doing.

   Everyday, at 9:45 am, our teacher would announce that it was snacktime, and everyone would fucking sprint to their cubbies to grab their lunchboxes like it was the goddamn hunger games. Kindergarten kids didn’t really have a concept of time, so i used this to my advantage. At 9:45 as my teacher would walk up to announce snacktime, I would knock on my desk really quickly three times. It was rly subtle, and I wasn’t sure that it would work.

   So after two or three weeks, I decided to have some fun. Thirty minutes after school began at like 8:30 or something, I tapped knocked on the desk. Half the class turned their heads and looked straight at the cubbies. 3 boys got up and were about to run to get their lunchbox. One girls stomach started growling REALLY loudly. The teacher had to take 5 minutes to get everyone to calm down and one kid started crying because he thought it was snacktime and he was so shocked and destroyed.

   Realizing that I had basically dog trained the whole class, I burst out laughing so hard I fell out of my chair and cut my head on the tile floor and got sent home early because I was laughing so hard they thought I had a concussion or something. When I explained what happened to my dad he left the room, but I could hear him losing it in the hallway.