36 - Aussie - NSFW Artist (comms open) https://tazclark.carrd.co Yeah, I know what you're here for. I got you <3 early access to my NSFW
cough cough

Lint Roller? I Barely Know Her
he wasn't even looking at me and he found me
2025 on Tumblr: Trends That Defined the Year
YOU ARE THE REASON
let's talk about Bridgerton tea, my ask is open

Product Placement

Show & Tell
"I'm Dorothy Gale from Kansas"
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AnasAbdin

Kiana Khansmith
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romaā

Janaina Medeiros

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@taz-clark
36 - Aussie - NSFW Artist (comms open) https://tazclark.carrd.co Yeah, I know what you're here for. I got you <3 early access to my NSFW
cough cough

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*sees art of my favs fucking nasty*
Nice
*see art of my favs being emotionally tender and vulnerable with each other*
Omg. Oooh my goooodd. Wft. They- uuuuuugghhhhh my god. I can't. Help. Aksbfjdbdj
āif you love this character then you must make him happy in your fics, right?ā wrong. the horror. suffering. internal hemorrhage. hospital. immediately
dude. https://www.instagram.com/reel/DZbSbSWSDZY/
so we agree. birds are metal
quick OC painting in which i make the wrong one taller. but we roll with it!

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Eztli
Miss you guys. Creatures of all time
late night sarco
london's brightest
That is a fucking reaction image I ever saw it

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Being an adult will have you unironically craving a vegetable
i will never be over the fact that during first contact a human offered their hand to a vulcan and the vulcan was just like āwow humans are fucking wildā and took it
Humanityās first contact with Vulcans was some guy goingĀ āIām down to fuck.ā
Vulcansā first contact with Humans was an emphaticĀ āSure.ā
@sineala
#iiiiiiiiiiiiii mean vulcans had been watching humans for a long time#they knew the significance of a handshake but still#they had to find some fast and loose ambassador#willing to fuckin make out with a human for the sake of not offending them on first contact#lmao#star trek give me the story of this fast and loose vulcan
āsirā¦theseā¦these humansā¦they greet each other byā¦ā *glances around before furtively whispering* āby clasping handsā¦ā
*prolonged silence*Ā āoh myā¦ā
āsirā¦sir how will we make first contact with them? surely weā¦we cannot refuse this handclasping ritual, they will take it as an insult, but what vulcan would agree to such a distasteful and uncomfortable ritual??ā
*several pensive moments later*Ā ācontact the vulcan high command and tell them to send us kuvak. i once saw that crazy son of a bitch arm wrestle a klingon, heāll put his hands on anythingā
Elsewhere, w/ kuvak: āā¦.my day has come.ā
The vulcanĀ who made first contact with humans is named Solkar guys. Yāall just be makinā up names for characters that already have names.
Bonus: hereās a screencap of Solkar doing the āmy body is readyā pose right before he shakes Zefram Cochraneās hand:
I swear Vulcans only come in two types and they areĀ ādistant xenophobesā orĀ āhorny on main for humanityā. Also apparently this guy is Spockās great-grandfather and frankly that explains everything.
Hey so I looked into this at one point and that handshake literally created a lifelong telepathic bond between the two of them, and basically all of Solkarās descendants were later obsessed with humans, including freaking SPOCK, so Iām not saying that handshake was so gay and good that it created an intergenerational telepathic bond between Solkarās descendants and humans, but Iām also notā¦.notā¦.saying that.
actual footage of first contact makeouts
The slow deliberation with which Solkar takes CockraneāsāIām sorry, Cochraneāsāhand⦠The sheer sensuality witch which Solkar infuses an otherwise borderline impersonal social ritual⦠It clearly shows a very conscious knowledge, on Solkarās part, of what the significance of the handshake is in Vulcan terms and of how affected he is by it.
Thatās why heās so slow in doing it, andĀ so sensual. A part of Solkar canāt believe this is happening, despite it being a perfectly logical thing to expect from a human, and the rest of him canāt believe how good it is.
I bet that if the camera zoomed in any further we would see the dilation of Solkarās pupils and a quickly-repressed shiver of delight. Cochraneās firm, businesslike clasp is probably (in sexual terms) being perceived as a deliciously carnal display of dominance.
No wonder Solkar is all like,Ā āTAKE ME, YOU WILD-MANNERED BARBARIAN WITH ENTICINGLY ROUGH CALLUSES.ā
And so we find out that yes, there is such a thing as bottoming in Pon-farr.
Every time this post comes round my dash, it just gets better.
#somehow the idea of vulcans being Horny On Main always gives me the giggles#like literally all they had to do#was be like actually#hand contact is very intimate for our species#and im p sure humanity as a whole would not find that insurmountably weird#there are human cultures that dont shake hands#vulcans are logical enough to think that through on their own#so clearly that vulcan was just down to fuck#down to fuck in a public#professional diplomatic situation no less#and he did not fucking care who knew itĀ (via kittykatthetacodemon)
Some Vulcan: we could probably just explain that handshakes are intimate in our culture
Solkar, rubbing lip gloss on his hand: donāt tell me how to do my jobĀ
mood: rewatching Hellsing

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"I don't care if he's hot, you need to FLEE"
Been practising my BG skills lately! process pics under the cut