#yourgone

kimber

I'd kill to go back and just choose to live

I can't believe that this is the end, I swore I was gone marry you... 💔 NEW MUSIC COMING SOON #yourgone #sheldonwhiteside #sheldonjevon #singer #songwriter #song #rnbmusic #malevocalist #newmusic #newmusicalert #newsingle #beardgang #blackmenwithbeards #beard #music #independentartist #independent #artist #chicagoartist (at Chicago, Illinois) https://www.instagram.com/p/BtmSMkBBgHE/?utm_source=ig_tumblr_share&igshid=wlp595edeipb

Your gone, but my memories are alive, the passion we had. The feelings we shared. The intensity. The urge. The instant wetness. The love I never thought i would ever feel. The window that i allowed you to open, to let me feel what I blocked my whole life.. #yourgone, but... the window is now cracked... and I have you to thank..... #thatwindowcracktho...

Your the 3rd this year... the 3rd Important Lover to be taken away without a goodbye, right in front of my eyes. And agian I blame myself... if I had not lied the night before, we would be safe cuddling in bed rn after a deep dark shot. we'd be melting together, intertwining legs and locking lips. I'd be burning with desire and smiling so hard my face hurt. I love you JAKE. My Hubby is facing around 4-5 yrs in prisoon. He had just picked up a half ounce of dark and a ball of g. when my friend texted Me saying there's was an emergency, my stomach dropped and my heart stopped. I knew then that he was gone. I literally dropped the the floor and screamed in agony, my insides felt torn, I couldn't breathe and my eyes poured a river of sorrow. You couldn't be gone.. you just couldnt... I knew it was the end. I'd need 1200 to bail him out, and have to send him back a few days later... back in September I lost my love Chris, he got 2.5 years. Then in Feb I lost Cory, his is a lifetime... and now Jake. And with Jake is hurts the worst, because we had just gotten off the street into a little house on a ranch o work for. so everyday I wake up alone, I cry as I walk to the barns, as I throw hay I look at the horses and the pain blooms in my heart because your not their asking questions and no calling them puppies. Your not at the room to greet me with a kiss, or left a letter saying you'll be back later. After work I sit alone with bandit and hold my knees to my chest and cry feverishly, shaking. Weak. My minds replays our memories and then PTSD episodes make me scream. And your not their to hold my tight, your not here to kiss my tears away. Your not here to make me giggle. Your not here to annoy me with your OCD, and my room is a disaster and do I angrily pick it up, and every day that passes I get pissed at my friends for making at mess- "Jake would be so mad at me if he saw this mess guys wtf pick up after yourselves!" ...I know, I'm going crazy. And my friends look at me with pity and dympathy. I have 4 days to come up with 900 dollars to get you out...I'm dying without you. Idk what to do... do I just block u from my mind like the others? Wtf.. I don't want to. I want you. Goddannit....

here i am

free verse

i still love you