#wubble

But the penny dropped last night that reading a bunch of AITH and AIO posts, however interspersed with gardening and cooking posts, is making me feel like I'm constantly surrounded by conflict and pleas for compassion. When I scrolled on past one instead of stopping to read it I felt genuine relief that I wouldn't have to find a way to care about this next poor person. Like damn. I pushed my brain so hard to care that there is noticeable relief when I don't have to. I realise that I've been spamming the social parts of my brain with tens of stories a day of woe and heartbreak, for months, and I am a bit tired.

Okay, so what to do instead? I go searching for what other people do instead and get suggestions like, "take up up baking!" "try learning pilates!" which are cute af but misunderstand the point imo. I am not looking for another Thing To Do, I am looking for a safe transitional space between Things To Do, a low-stakes easy fun thing that will coax my neurodivergent brain away from one Thing and gently into another Thing. I loved duolingo for a bit but they seem to have turned to the dark side lately.

Perhaps the issue is that because yes hello neurodivergence, switching tasks is always hard, so any transitional activities will be done to excess. The reels or the posts would probably be ok once or twice a day for a few minutes. But it won't ever be just that, so I need something else to do that's safe, easy to start, and easy to finish.