#webeweaving

NO! DO I LOOK LIKE THEM?

Do I have my mothers face? Or my fathers?

Did my late brother take my face or did I take my mothers?

Who’s eyes do I have?

Who do I smile like?

Do I laugh like my mother? Or do I walk like my father?

Did I inherit my mothers anger? Do I carry my fathers anxiety or is it the other way around?

Why do I look like this? Who do I look like? Why are my eyebrows thick? Why are my lips two different colors? Why do I have a spot on the right side of my face? WHERE ARE THESE BEAUTY MARKS COMING FROM?

I get invoked with rage when I see girls who mirror their mothers beauty. “Who do you get your looks from”

“I look like my mommy”.

Something so small yet so human, you probably don’t think twice about, is something that kills me every single day

Who do I look like?!

The only desire I have to have children is to know what my face looks like on someone else’s. What do my eyes look like when they are pointed back at me? Are they beautiful? Are they sad? Do they sparkle? That’s selfish right? That’s all I’ve ever wanted though so maybe my daughter will understand.

What I would do to look into my mothers eyes and see they are the same as mine, maybe loving myself would be easier

I cant do casual

Im not built for stumble down the block into my room at 2 am only for you to leave at 4

Not created for sleeping back to back hands too tired to wander to find eachother

Cant handle half eye contact from across sober rooms and unspoken stares in drunk ones

Incapable of not falling for you as I stare into your eyes, hands tangled into your hair

Im built for stumbling out of bed in the morning to brush our teeth together

Created for sleeping so tangled in eachother you cant help but wake up to kiss my forehead

Holding hidden hands in sober rooms and each other in drunk ones, friends be damned

Capable of being subtle, but my hands still tracing your waist when passing in hallways

I will never be good at pretending "we’re just friends" and nothing more, and I never have been

I am made to play with your hair while talking with our friends, 

created to share every glass of water I drink with you

Giggling like a schoolgirl when you text me

Definitely not locked in or subtle

I hope to be alice, to wake up and find that my world is different.

Or the darlings, who fly somewhere else.

Or Haru, (the cat returns) who was led to some fantasy island on a clutter of cars.

Or Coraline who found a magic trap door.

To be whisked away.

The real world is boring. I do nothing but listen to music, write and hate my life.

Best manga I’ve read.

The slow burn was executed well, in my opinion, I’ve seen ppl complain about it but I was realistic and not fast but not extremely slow to the point where you feel like dropping.

The thing I liked most was yoon’s attitude. Eeevveryone seems to complain about it and she just didn’t care. And he liked her anyways. I think a lot of times we see FL be bubbly or easily dominated, or meek but she wasn’t. I love her stubborn hardheaded self.

Now it’s over and my heart is broken because I know I’ll never find anything like it.

There are so many different parts of me that I have created over the years. Some I recognize and some that look so different it may as well have not been me. I have been non stop growing, and moving, and changing, and adapting like a Chameleon.

I spent my whole life adapting and fitting into the molds of what people wanted me to be, but after all that time i stopped knowing who i was

so if you'll excuse me i will be sat on this forest floor with every version of me i have ever known scattered around me slowly piecing myself together with a carefully crafted thread. One made of pine needles, a garnet and gold string, strands of curly hair, an old friendship bracelet, a shoelace, a gas receipt, my childhood blanket, and yellow cedar tree roots.

You will always have a special place in my heart, I’ll never forget watching it for the first time