#wanderlust tedtalks

It can be scary living with these disorders, and you and your system deserve so much respect for all that you've been through and have survived. It's no small thing to stay alive in the face of having a disorder like these. We wish you peace, happiness, and safety, whoever you are. Whether you're seeking fusion, functional multiplicity, anything in-between, or something else entirely to manage your condition, we hope it goes well for you and that you see the results you want.

Stay safe and be kind to yourselves. The world is already harsh enough to us DID/OSDD folks, you don't have to be cruel to yourselves on top of it. You deserve to be happy.

Thinking about how Whole is never really treated like a person, but a concept in the album.

Thinking about how Soul acknowledges in some ways that he is Whole.

Thinking about Soul being a system that's in denial, despite knowing the truth.

Thinking about Soul saying "Doctor, I can't tell if I'm not me."

Thinking about how Heart and Mind view Whole as all three of them working in unity, or as a state of mind, while Soul is borderline fanaticially obsessive over Whole as though he were a deity.

Thinking about how Whole might not even actually exist at all, and Soul is just chasing an unattainable fantasy.

Thinking about Heart and Mind having had control over the body before, not Soul.

Thinking about Heart and Mind trying to keep Soul from committing suicide.

Thinking about Heart as an emotional alter, Mind as a protector alter, and Soul as a host alter.

Thinking about them finding peace living as a system when Soul can finally admit to himself that he's not a singlet, and accept Heart and Mind as being permanent.

Obviously the intended narrative hits incredibly hard as well and Chonny deserves so much respect for what he created and how vulnerable of a project it is, but I just can't stop thinking about the system implications of... well, everything in that album.

Obviously my opinions and readings are coloured by the fact that I have DID myself, but genuinely everything about this album screams system to me and it's part of why I've gotten so attached to it.

We systems are rarely represented in media. When we are, we're often painted as murderers, as being inherently untrustworthy, or otherwise being bad, scary people. In CCCC though (if you interpret it as a system narrative) we see a system that isn't full of "evil alters" or any shit like that. We see a system struggling to keep it together and who are fighting for control, not because they want to ruin anybody's life, but because they genuinely believe they know best. Of course they're all misguided in some manner, but their intentions are ultimately good. They want the Host to be safe and to live life well. They all just have a different view of what that looks like.

So many members of my own system see themselves in Heart, Mind, and Soul. The ones of us who aren't as emotional and struggle to empathise with others, but who genuinely mean well. The ones of us who are so emotionally volatile, but who genuinely just want us all to be happy and stay alive. The ones of us who have to be mediators between those other two types, and who struggle to keep everything together in times of strife. We as a system have never felt so represented and understood by any media as we do here.

Amy is loud, energetic, bubbly, and screams her love from the rooftops. She's never afraid to express her emotions openly, and that absolutely also applies to how she expresses love. Amy is as bold and bright as they come, a total open book, and an absolute sweetheart. However, she also struggles a lot with her own sense of identity and self respect. She's spent so much of her life chasing Sonic and trying to bend herself around him that she's sometimes unsure of who she truly is. Amy, whether consciously or not, hides her fears, identity issues, and lack of self respect behind her bubbly persona

Meanwhile, Rouge is a lot more subtle with how she expresses her emotions. Usually she expresses her love and care for others through actions, and it's more rare that she gets very sappy or emotional with her words. She's caring, but she's more subtle and quiet about it. Despite Rouge being more openly flirty and teasing though, she seems to bury a lot of her deeper emotions, whether that be due to fear or pride, it still remains true. She seems to downplay or outright ignore her own feelings much of the time, and she likely had a lot of emotions buried deep down that she hasn't allowed herself to express, or possibly even really acknowledge and feel even privately. Rouge, whether consciously or not, hides her deeper emotions and trauma behind her flirty and teasing femme fatale persona

When you put both of these people together, you get a dynamic that allows for mutual growth and healing. Rouge and Amy both have their own demons, but they can uplift each other with their strengths. Amy has someone other than Sonic who sees her for who she truly is, who loves her and wants her to see just how wonderful she truly is, and who is able to help her build her own sense of identity outside of the one person she had built herself around for so long. Likewise, Rouge has someone who she feels safe enough to be open and honest with, someone who encourages her to let herself be more vulnerable and open about how she's really feeling underneath the exaggerated flirtiness and teasing

Rouge is overall confident and self assured, Amy is overall deeply emotional and compassionate. Rouge represses her emotions, Amy struggles with her sense of self. Their flaws and their strengths perfectly sync with each other, both of them being able to provide exactly what the other needs, while also challenging them and encouraging them to grow and change