#ugh ouch

𝐋𝐎𝐔𝐃 & 𝐃𝐄𝐀𝐅𝐄𝐍𝐈𝐍𝐆 𝐒𝐈𝐋𝐄𝐍𝐂𝐄

it's silent. that's what he believes surprises him the most about michael's presence here. lucifer hasn't looked to him, hasn't even made a move to acknowledge his existence here; he had figured michael would do that part for him, but - there's a strange ... feeling, that comes with the quiet company. a feeling that he doesn't expect to get from anyone, much less him. it's a comfort. it gives him the room he needs in his mind to breathe. to process.

mortality is a fucky thing. but he had never truly experienced it, not properly. not until the life of a child that he had promised to protect, had been taken away.

did michael know about that? is that why he's here? why else?

"you've gone five whole minutes without a sarcastic comment." he finally says. and he thinks it's the first time in a long, long time that his tone portrays an actual softness towards michael. and now - he follows it up with something that he is unsure if he has ever said.

i know :(( Robin definitely takes it harder than the rest of the group bc she continues trying to contact him well after he took off, but he eventually can't be reached.

but I like to imagine that in this au corroded coffin does become a big name rock band in the mid-90s, so i'm imagining Eddie showing up for rehearsal for their guest musician appearance on Steve's show and just. fuckin decking the shit out of Steve at first glance. just knuckles straight to the chin. "That was for Robin you piece of shit!"

-Kuroo

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                             if     i     could     take     it     all     back     i     would,     ,     if     i     could     hide     myself     i     would-     if     i     could     get     rid     of     this     part     of     me,     ,     the     one     that     scares     everyone     away     i     would,     ,     i     would     exorcise     this     demon     and     send     it     to     the     pits     of     hell.     but     i     cannot,     ,     i     must     suffer     with     this     mental     illness     with     this     torturous     being     that     i     keep     in     the     back     of     my     mind.     .     .     im     sorry,     ,     ive     told     him     he     can     go     but     he     wont     go,     ,     i     am     afriad     he     feels     as     if     he     has     to     stay-     im     scared     robby     thinks     of     me     as     some     type     of     glue     trap,     ,     one     that     will     fill     his     mouth     and     make     it     so     he     is     now     silenced     in     the     matter     of     our     relationship,     ,     one     that     has     him     stuck     to     the     paper     unable     to     move.     

he     can     leave     me,     ,     i     wish     in     moments     that     he     would-     just     for     his     own     sake     ,     ,     for     his     happiness     i     wish     he     would     go     and     be     a     rock     star     forgetting     about     me but     i     am     thankful     he     has     stayed,     ,     for     if     he     hadn’t     stayed     i     dont     know     what     i     would     have     done,     ,     i     might     not     be     sitting     in     my     home     writing     them     as     he     sleeps.     .     .          

i     love     you     robby,     ,     you     are     my     sunshine.     ♡ ♡ ♡