#tw adhd

this episode is kicking my ass, you guys. i want to write the requests that you guys have sent me. i would love nothing more than to write for this blog, but right now, writing does not bring me joy. i’m tired all the time, i have no motivation, and i really don’t feel like doing anything if i’m being honest. one of the new medications that i’m starting this week is supposed to maybe help me with my energy and the symptoms of my add until i can find a psychiatrist and get tested.

if i don’t have adhd, i do’t know what the fuck is wrong with me. i have a hard time multitasking, i hyper-fixate on the most random of shit, i lose focus easily, am distracted constantly. and it’s like what the hell is it if it isn’t what i think it is.

all of that to say, my break may be longer than i think it will be. please bare with me. i love you all so much.

you made it just before dinner time, and a smile spread on your face when you saw that both your mom and your sister's cars weren't in the driveway. you parked in your usual spot, and followed Chris through the house.

"i figured we could start out with moving bedrooms for you." Chris said, and you looked at him quizzically as he grabbed a water bottle from the kitchen. he smirked when he saw the confusion on your face. "i'd been trying to convince your mom for a while to allow you to have y/s/n's room. you're older, and she really doesn't need any more space, considering how messy she is."

you chuckled, and took the water from his hand. "where's Dodge? you asked, looking around and not seeing the happy puppy anywhere.

"at my moms. i dropped him off yesterday before coming after you. i wouldn't put it past your mother to take him with her, and he wouldn't enjoy sitting in the car for too long." he said, and he led you up the stairs.

he opened the door to y/s/n's room, and stepped in. "her stuff isn't packed up yet, they just grabbed a few essentials and left, but their coming back at some point today or tomorrow to pack and move their things. but, i thought we could just get a jump start on things, and move you in here. it has a master bathroom, just like mine, and then we won't have to share anymore. you can turn your room into whatever you want." he explained, and you nodded, looking around at your new room.

you had a lot of work to do. y/s/n had a lot of stuff, and she never took care of her room the way you were taught to. she had clothes all over the floor, and there were even more unworn clothes still in their bags from the store. no wonder she never had any money.

"i'll grab a garbage bag, and we can get started." Chris said.

a few hours and a meal from mcdonald's later, the room was almost done. you were putting your finishing touched on your rainbow wall that Chris had helped you make, when you heard an engine rumbling in the driveway. you dismissed it, thinking it was Chris coming home with Dodger.

you hung up the last photo, a photo of Superman in Justice League, when your door opened. you flipped around, a smile on your face, a smile that fell when you saw who exactly was standing there.

your sisters face contorted into anger, before she took in the room. when she noticed that none of the things in the room belonged to her, she flipped out, and stormed off to find your mother.

"MOOOM! Y/S/N MESSED UP MY ROOM!"

you sighed, rolling your eyes, and turning back to your bed. you grabbed your phone off of it, and texting Chris.

"mom and y/s/n are here just so you know," you sent, and locked your phone just as your mother came storming in the room. you saw the anger burning behind her eyes.

"you've really done it now." she said. "as if causing constant problems, not doing your school work, and being disobedient wasn't enough, you had to go and do this? this is your sisters room, not yours."

you shook your head, a little confused. "uhm, no, it's not. it's mine now. that's what Chris said. he helped me do the majority of this. he said th-" you began to defend, but she cut you off.

"i don't care what he told you. this is my house too, and you aren't going to get to sit here and get away with all of this bullshit that i've put up with for 16 years." you gulped, hoping Chris was on his way home.

"y/s/n and i aren't moving out, so you best get packing to move back into your room." she said, and turned on her heel. as she did, you heard Chris enter the house. you sat down on the bed, your hands shaking slightly. you knew she wasn't telling you the truth, but there was that nagging thought in the back of your head that maybe, just maybe, they'd worked things out, and you would be forced back into the other room.

to any other person, it wouldn't be that big of a deal. but to you, moving rooms signified the change in your life. you were losing a 'mom' and a 'sister', but you were gaining a dad. a dad who understood you, and wanted to get you help in school. moving back into the old room, to you, signified that nothing was changing. that you were going to be stuck in the same rut you have been for 16 years.

you heard some voices downstairs, and talking slowly developed into yelling. you had no idea exactly what the voices were saying, but they were loud enough to make you crawl under the covers on your bed, and wait for them to stop. once they did, you heard feet coming up the stairs, and you curled up tighter, thinking they belonged to your mother.

the door opened, and you braced yourself for the screaming of a lifetime, but it never came. instead, you were greeted with a weight sitting on your bed, and a warm hand rubbing your back.

"it's okay. they're not staying. they're packing their things up right now, and then they'll be gone. don't worry, nothing she said about you was true." Chris reassured you. you nodded, and sniffled.

"you're going to be okay."

a year and and a half later, and you were a completely different girl. Chris had officially adopted you, and you'd called him dad ever since that court date that had been attended by his entire family.

to your surprise, your mother stayed in Boston. y/s/n and you still attended the same school, and you two stayed away from each other. there was no hope for a relationship with you two, and Chris never pushed you.

speaking of Chris, you had never been more grateful for your dad. he'd held true to his promise about getting you help. he'd taken you to every doctor he could, and after receiving your diagnosis's of ADHD and Sensory Processing Disorder, he'd taken every precaution possible to ensure you were able to thrive. he'd worked with your teachers, and you were allowed to leave the classroom and go for walks when needed. he enrolled you in gymnastics and yoga. you had a tutor, and he gave you an Erin Condren planner that could be personalized with sticker kits to help you keep on top of everything. he made sure you had as many stress relieving techniques such fidget toys, and you had recently started occupational therapy.

you were Chris's happy girl, a sharp contrast to 'the problem child' as you were described to be when he first met your mother. you had been instantly accepted as a part of the family, and he always made sure you knew that you were the number one priority in his life. wether that meant not taking a role because he'd have to be away from you for too long, or taking the role and adjusting your life and schedule to ensure that you could come with him. no issue was too big or too small in his eyes, not when it came to his daughter, his little girl.