#tee-total

I have freshers in about 3 weeks time, and it seems from looking at my student union website that it’s all about staying up late and drinking.

I might not be every man’s cup of tea, but I give good email. In fact, I give such good email that I’m always worried I don’t measure up in real life. At least I’m not alone, though.

On Monday I met The Banker. Although he didn’t look my type, I agreed to the date because his quirky messages made me laugh. Some of his texts even seemed deliberately stern, so I thought there was a chance he’d picked up on the subtle hints in my vanilla dating profile. Considering only three men have managed this, I was somewhat ambitious in my expectations.

He showed a complete lack of balls by choosing a French lunchy-pastry place that didn’t serve much booze and kicked you out before 8pm. We’re all in the same boat, us online daters. There’s always the worry you’ll end up seated in front of Alan Partridge or Charles Manson and need to make a quick getaway, but to be so brazen about it, well it’s a bit clumsy, isn’t it?

We arrived at the same time as each other and in a fit of nerves he chose the only coffee table in the room – a very tiny, incredibly low coffee table – even though he wanted us to eat. I’m a trooper, so I struggled through by leaning low and shoveling bits of loaded baguette in my gob, giving him an unavoidably first-class view of my bosom.

Despite being rabidly feminist, I’ve a penchant for playing the little lady and waited for him to order some wine until I finally caved and discovered he doesn’t drink. So it was water for him and a glass of fizz for me, followed by a barrage of questions that made me feel like a novelty. I tried to find out more about him, but all I discovered was that he didn’t really didn’t do much outside of finance and taking his niece to see the odd play.

When he asked me about the most interesting writing project I’ve ever done, I answered truthfully because I’m an idiot. He seemed concerned that writing for a posh escort agency might equate with me being a hooker. To reassure him, I mentioned a few details in as PG a way as possible before the staff asked us to leave because they wanted to go home. As I’m British, I agreed to go for another drink somewhere else. 

Over a stiff soda, he told me he was muslim. This wouldn’t have been a deal-breaker for a sexually deviant muslim with bags of personality, a progressive view on escort agencies and a love of debating the existence of God with a card-carrying atheist, but that wasn’t quite him.

So many unanswered questions.

Like why, of all the profiles in all the internet did he opt for the freaky-deeky atheist who referenced Secretary in her profile, along with a bunch of weird crap he’d never heard of? Why the woman wearing a dubiously shiny shirt in one of her photos?

Making this post because sometimes I need to remind myself why I don't drink, and because it may influence somebody to improve their own life. I am aware that some people handle alcohol way better than I do, but that is not who this post is aimed at.

Hangovers. From the age of 18 to 23 I have wasted so many Sunday's vomiting. 

Morals. I am one of those drunks whose morals go out the window after one too many. I do NOT want to wake up next to THOSE guys anymore.

My physical health. I now have more energy, clearer skin, am finding it easier to lose weight and I am sick less often.

My mental health. You know what someone prone to depression doesn't need? a depressant. Alcohol makes my depression and anxiety ten times worse and I only realised that when I quit.

My relationships. Since quitting drinking my relationships with my friends and family have improved vastly. 

My studies. My college work has improved so much! now that I have a better perspective and I feel less stressed.