#taivan x reader

tai had pulled out her favorite strap, making you take her — it was her favorite way to have you, writhing where you laid while van kissed you and sucked marks so viciously onto your neck and chest that you suspected they might never fade, hands roaming your body softly in contrast to the roughness of tai thrusting into you. you had long lost the desire to think by then, after you had lost count of how many times you had come. you had very willingly let go of any semblance of control or very coherent thought, you had surrendered it to them, and it had slipped out before you could stop it — with van’s hand around your neck and taissa’s strap buried in you, you could never have stopped it. it was a faint and fleeting title you uttered as you moaned their names when you came. the next morning, you weren’t even sure if you had said it.

they were. they remembered all too vividly how beautiful it had sounded, the title gracing your lips, in the desperate tone you always used when you were close. it was an unspoken thing between them as they got ready that morning, as they had their morning coffee together in the kitchen after you had left for work and van was nearly ready to leave to go open her store. but then van began to gloat — she made some casual remark about she always knew you would be into calling her mommy, she had only been waiting for you to initiate it, how tonight she would make you say it again and again.

“you think that was for you?” taissa had shaken her head, setting her coffee mug down on the counter, the sound of it sharp through the quiet kitchen. “i was the one fucking her.”

“it was a joint effort,” van crossed her arms.

“i was doing most of the work,” taissa said, boxing van in where she stood leaning back against the kitchen counter, hands coming to rest on van’s hips. she studied her for a moment, expression contemplative. “i’m surprised you never said it for me first, though…”

van scoffed, looking away for a moment before meeting the other woman’s gaze again. she looked at her incredulously. “you want me to call you mommy?”

taissa stepped back with a shrug. it would be everything to her, hearing van say it for her, for van to give up control to her in the same way you do when you’re beneath both of them. but what she also wanted was to win — for van to admit that it was tai you were addressing last night — and it was too easy for van to recognize the game.

again, unspoken, a new arrangement: if they couldn’t tell who you were blessing with a new title last night, the only option would be to make you say it for them again.

Behind you, Taissa had been counting the apples that all three of you had picked so far, making sure not to get too much of the same thing.

Standing beside you, Van finishes one of her apples and tosses it to a tree root, wiping her hands against her khaki shorts. Your sunglasses, which she’s wearing, slip down her nose bridge, making her have to fix them once again.

“That was not bad, but that was the last golden delicious I had in my bag,” Van states as she turns her head to you.

You shake your head and laugh, “You couldn’t wait until you got home to devour the thing?” Van shrugs and stretches both hands to emphasize her statement, “I enjoy living in the moment, less trash to pick up.” She raises her voice and continues the trail.

Taissa comes up beside you, wrapping her arm around your waist as the two of you follow Van. “I don’t think she even knows what that means,” Taissa whispers in your ear and the two of you laugh.

Van turns around, walking backwards now as she raises a brow and bites her bottom lip, “I actually do, thank you. And while you’re talking crap, Tai. What do you have in your basket, hm?”

Taissa looks down at her basket, counting to make sure she has everything correct.

“All twenty-four apples, baby.” She stretches out the baby as she laughs. Van playfully rolls her eyes and turns around, walking forward again.

The heat blazed on all of your skins, the sunscreen seeming to work overtime. You lazily carried your tote bag but made sure not to drop your basket of apples.

Resting your head on Taissa’s shoulder, she glances down at you. Hiding her smile, she purses her lips together and gently kisses your forehead. Files and butterflies fly past you three, Van swats her hand away to keep the mosquitoes from biting her.

You and Taissa let go of each other and walk beside Van now, the people around you guys still looking for their preferred apples as you do the same, briefly looking at each tree until something catches your eye.

“I can already hear my mom asking me what I plan on doing with these apples,” Taissa lets out, her eyes flickering back to the basket, almost in regret.

Van looks at her and chuckles, “Why did you pick that many?”

Taissa shrugs, her foot begins to kick a bruised apple in front of her, treating it like a golf ball. “You could make candy apples, apple cobbler, apple turnovers.” You come up with, looking over to Taissa who smiles at the thought.

“Yeah, I’ll probably do that. You want some of the apples?” She raises her basket and you laugh, shaking your head.

“Baby, I got more than I need.” You express and stop in your tracks. Walking away from the two, you walk over to a tree, finding another fresh golden delicious.

Snapping it off from the tree, a leaf was still attached to it. You walk back over to them, seeing Van’s face light up as you raise it to her face.

“Thank you!” She exclaimed while grabbing it, she placed it in her bag carefully, and kissed your cheek. Wrapping a hand around your waist you guys continue to walk.

The heat from the sun starts to get better as the clouds shade it away a little.

Making it over to the large white tables to weigh the apples and pay, you guys wait in a short line, music playing from the workers there.

Checking the time, you hadn’t realized an hour had passed until now, considering it only felt as if twenty minutes had been spent.

Once your stuff gets weighed, Van pays for you, her, and Taissa. “Aww, you’re so sweet.” You tell Van as you grab her chin and turn her face to you. Pressing your lips against hers, you open your mouth a little, feeling the tip of her tongue touch yours.

Pulling back, Van blushes and looks down. “It was nothing, you know.” She shrugs, and you and Taissa share a laugh as the three of you walk to the parking lot to Taissa’s car.

“I was thinking you guys could come over to my house tonight? Maybe we could actually figure out what to do with these apples and binge-watch some movies.” You mutter, checking your phone once you all get in Taissa’s car.

Pulling out of the parking lot, she checks her mirrors before continuing to drive as you put on some music.

Van sits behind you, laying her head against the window as she closes her eyes.

“Yes please, I miss your bed.” She groans, you giggle and shiver as Taissa rests her hand on your thigh, caressing you through your jeans.

Glancing at Taissa, you then lean in and kiss her cheek before sitting comfortably in your seat and staring out the windshield window. The music and humming of the car lulls you into a nice nap as Taissa keeps driving, admiring you and Van any chance she gets.

© winterz. my inbox is always open!!

in my mind van was the one that pitched this date idea.

also a like, comment, and reblogs are extremely appreciated. please support your writers. we like to know how you feel as readers. your support pushes us to continue writing!! so thank you to those who have been supporting me, it means a lot!!

taglist: @rudymoon @lonerslug @pinkfairylegobatman @beenathembo @ju-elle @c4sings6 @turtlevlogsworld @iwstella @mai4u @junglebitch21 @marioandluigigi @fawnedofus @delulu-lesbian @daisy-p17 @easiwhitechocolate

This might not even be all of the hidden details I've written in my fics, but these are my favorites! For starters, in chapter one of A Long Way From Budapest, Natasha tells Yelena that Clint used to make jokes when they were on missions together to make them fun for her. And after that conversation, Yelena starts making jokes when they start working on their mission again, more so than she usually would. She's trying to make Natasha feel better the same way Clint used to, both to comfort her and because she's desperate to fill his role as the most important person in Natasha's life, just like Natasha is for her. And when they're at the musical at the beginning, Yelena wants to make a comment about how actor-Natasha can't kick someone in the face without help. Then, at the end, that's exactly what Yelena does to one of the Tracksuits, proving to Natasha that she can do it all on her own. There will be more examples as the fic goes on, but that's a more subtle moment showing how badly Yelena wants Natasha's approval. Oh, and the man with a white mustache and aviator glasses that Yelena bumped into in her mad dash to the Rockefeller Christmas tree? Yeah, that was Stan Lee.

This is something I've tried to hint at in a few of my fics, but the best example is in Bathtime. Yelena talks about wanting a drink multiple times throughout the fic, and even though Kate disapproves, she doesn't say anything. She does bring her vodka at the end, along with the nonalcoholic option of mango juice. And Yelena only drinks the mango juice. Kate would never judge or pressure Yelena, but I believe she would encourage her not to drink as much in subtle ways like this all the time, and I believe Kate is the only one who could make Yelena want to stop drinking. Like I said, this theme is present in a few of my fics, but this depiction of it is my favorite. This fic also has one of my favorite references I've written, even though what I'm referencing has nothing to do with the fic itself. While Kate is washing Yelena's hair, I wrote that it is "...the most intimate Yelena had ever been with Kate- or with anyone..." This is a reference to the show Brooklyn 99, which has a running gag where the character Charles Boyle claims that "washing their hair is the most intimate thing you can do to your lover with your fingers." It's completely unrelated and I knew nobody would clock it, so it's literally just for me and my sister, but I love it and this is the perfect time to mention it! Also, Yelena is asexual in all of my fics, so in their case, it's actually true! I had to make the reference! 😂 And the mission Yelena is getting back from in this fic, destroying a Hook lab, is a reference to the Marvel comics. I'd read one where Sam and Natasha take down some Hook dealers recently when I started writing this fic, and I assumed that Hook was a well-known drug in the comics... but I later found out that it only appears in two issues. That's it! That fact makes me like this reference even more honestly. You have to be a real comics nerd to catch it!

Back to my very first Bishova fic, there are a few hidden details in part two of Violet Light. When Kate is showing Yelena and Alexei the coin trick that Clint taught her, she tells them, "I can use that little trick to knock somebody unconscious from thirty feet away.” I know that Clint told her twenty feet, and so does Kate. But she's exaggerating because she wants to impress Yelena 🤭 Yelena might've been too in her own head to notice, but Kate was nervous too! And a bit later, when they're eating donuts, Kate chooses a bear claw, and Yelena chooses a blueberry fritter. I chose these because I think they would like them, but that's not the only reason. Kate chooses the one with "bear" in the name, an animal that's often associated with Russia, where Yelena is from. And Yelena chooses a blueberry fritter, which, despite the name of the berry, looks mostly purple, Kate's signature color. Only their second day together and they're already subconsciously choosing each other 🥰 And this isn't quite as hidden, but I love the contrast in the lines, “-I remember it so vividly. I had my arrow pointed right at her, and she locked eyes with me and just shook her head.” Kate was staring right at her, and Yelena just nodded dumbly." In the scene Kate is describing, Yelena had all the power, and she conveyed that with just a simple shake of her head. But now, Kate is telling the story and literally controlling the narrative while Yelena isn't even paying attention. Now that she's the one at Kate's mercy, so to speak, she just nods. I love that line, and this incredibly self-indulgent tag game is the perfect place to finally talk about it. And this isn't hidden, but since I don't draw any attention to it, this also feels like a good place to point out that this entire chapter happens while Yelena is in her underwear 😂

And now to the first multi-chapter fic I ever finished! In part two of A Real American Christmas, Yelena agrees to sing Nate's favorite Christmas carol with him when Clint and Cooper don't want to. Now she probably would've done that anyway, but what he says right before she agrees to sing with him is "I want my song!” which is exactly what Yelena said at six years old when they were in the car on the way to the airstrip. That exact phrasing stirred something deep within her, and she jumped at the chance to help Nate have a better childhood than she did. I draw a lot of parallels between Yelena and Nate in this fic, with them both wearing sweaters with Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer on them and laughing at all the same places during Home Alone. There are a lot of things I love about this fic, but these details are one of my favorites. I see Yelena's relationship with Nate as a second chance at a childhood, and I'm sure I'll write more parallels like this whenever I write the two of them in future fics.

Another thing that A Real American Christmas is littered with is references to my real life! I love slipping references to my life into my work, since real life is always better than anything I can make up. Speaking of Nate's song, The Twelve Days of Christmas was my favorite Christmas song when I was a kid, and I used to be the one who forced my family to sing it every year (the Barton tradition of everyone picking a carol to sing is a tradition I have with my dad's side of the family). And the "Christmas tree" ornament that he made that Cooper talks about in part three? That's a real ornament I made! Except mine is a tree topper 😂 Natasha's fish ornament is also based on an ornament that my cousin made when I was little. But she was 16 when she made it, and she's now a graphic designer, so it's actually a great drawing. I originally planned on making Natasha's good, too, but I thought it was funnier to say she couldn't draw. And the sledding story that Clint tells about her is something that really happened to me and my friends when I was a kid, except my friend's dad didn't actually fall into the creek. And back to part two of Violet Light, just like Kate, I covered myself with dirt while playing softball when I was a kid, and my grandpa told my mom, who arrived late, that I'd slid into home plate. Although I'm pretty sure I was just playing in the dirt, I didn't care about softball enough to want to slide into home. And in Fireflies, the horse pulling the carriage in Central Park is named Brook, which is the name of a horse my great uncle had on his farm when I was a kid. I always name every single horse character I write Brook because I loved her, and she was the first horse I ever rode. And in chapter one of Bishop & Belova, Yelena tells Kate that "...the only things we have in storage are things like guitar strings and slide oil.” Guitar strings are obviously for guitars, and slide oil is specifically for trombones, the two instruments that I play.

Now we're going to go back to some of my older fics from my other fandoms! Unsurprisingly, the story that reader tells Tara about how they started watching horror movies in Meet Cut(e) is exactly how I got into them. I always pull elements of my own personality and life when I write x reader fics, but that reader character is easily the most similar to me. And in my Taivan x reader fic, I Just Want You To Be Happy, the story that Taissa tells Van about Sammy looking at the clouds while playing soccer is exactly the same as what I did as a kid!

This tag game is one of the most self-indulgent posts I've made on here, but I truly am so excited to see everyone's responses!!! If other fanfic writers are even half as excited to talk about stuff like this as I am, then I'm confident this will catch on the way that I'm hoping it will. Please don't hold back when you share, I promise you, people will be interested in what you have to say about your fics! If it helps, you can think of it as a birthday present to me 😉 I can't think of a better way to end my birthday than reading all the juicy secrets about my favorite fics!

And finally, some no-pressure tags for some of my favorite fanfic authors! 🥰

@devskindawritingblog @katethisisnotcutlery @uncleasad @ooga-94-booga @fruityzari @loislame84 @ohthenight @jammatown919 @vidathomir @the0fi @girlonthefireescape @mustyoudothat @cindersaint @doggedworship @rudeamity @avastarred @takadasaiko @animixedarts @sugarskies @nixzephyr3001 @maya444ever @mosquito-queen @f4ggydog @the-gay-canary @kisakisaxo @novelconcepts @teabookgremlin @moringmark @lacyscabinet @fantasylandbitch @axinite25 @alkivm @the-oblivious-writer @celticwolf55 @andsoigotabutterfly @toournextadventure @persevereforahappyending @somewillwin @duskdrawings @bishlova-ship @hard-core-super-star @nonbinary-alien25 @legitgayshit @bri-the-nautilus @theboardwalkbody @elizabeth-mitchells @nerd-at-sea5 @everythingmp3 @crincher @dragonnnfly @nahimjustfeelingit-writes @agreatcheesecakestudentstuff

And of course they expected constant hardship, it wasn't easy being closeted in nineties new jersey, but they had each other, and for now that was all they needed.

But then you arrived.

With some shitty luck your parents had decided to leave the hustle and bustle of New York and settle down in the jersey suburbs, assuring you and your siblings that this would be a great opportunity for them and your family alike. Your sister was excited to get a bigger bedroom, your brother eager to play football in a real backyard.

You, though? You were pissed.

Obviously your parents could tell something was wrong, wary of your cold eyes and constant silence. They'd tried to win you over on the inevitable, going on and on about some stupid soccer team your new high school would have and how many great new friends you’d make, the both of them clearly happy to get you as far away from your current crowd as possible.

You didn’t want to hear any of it, didn't care about soccer or clear skies or quiet mornings enough to make you happy about leaving your friends behind, the ones who felt like the only people in the world who understood you inside and out. The odds of finding a group of equally complicated and equally queer teens in Wiskayok, New Jersey were stacked against you.

So as an act of teenage rebellion you didn’t talk to anyone. Not your parents when they told you they'd settled on house, not the movers when they came to take your things out of your bedroom, and not your new neighbors when they came up with some putrid dish in a ‘welcoming’ gesture.

The only reason a word came out of your mouth at your new school was because some blonde girl who was incredibly too hyper at 8 in the morning came up to you and informed you she'd be your new school guide. You tried to keep up your attitude but her kindness was unrelenting.

She'd shown you the cafeteria, the gym, each hallway and stairwell in the building to the point where it started to feel like she just wanted an excuse to talk without being interrupted. You were zoning out until you made it out to the field, admiring the sea of green freshly cut grass before making an off-handed comment about their soccer team.

If you thought the girl beside you couldn't become increasingly excited you were dead wrong.

That's how they saw you only a few hours later, clothed in your gym set with a determined scowl on your face as you strike a ball so hard you nearly hit another tryout in the face. You gave a pressed smile as an apology, but they could tell you didn't really care.

“I want her.”

Vans eyes nearly bulge out of her head. She hasn't heard Tai speak in over 20 minutes, only audible scoffs and disgruntled grunts, even a shared stifled laugh when one of the tryouts slips on a patch of mud and falls on her ass. God, these girls had their work cut out for them.

But you were different, anyone could see it. If anything you seemed angry, channeling your emotions into each powerful play until you were the only one left standing on the field. As she watched you she was reminded of the first time she saw Tai on this field, knocking down girls and not letting up like she had something to prove.

And when she looked up at Tai's face, she could see that same mix of awe, excitement, and just a pinch of fear.

By the end of the day you were on the team.

It was clear from the first practice that something was different in how Tai and Van treated you. Van was always the mostly sarcastic but sweet one on the team, so it wasn't as big a shock that she took over the job of introducing you to everyone from Misty. (Who Van was definitely not scared of when she started glaring into the back of her head for a week.)

But Van was being…really nice. Normally she’d have a handful of quips and remarks for when someone screwed up, nothing too harsh but poignant enough for you to go ‘Yeah, I screwed up.’ So when you slipped and ate shit on a patch of muddy grass, everyone bated their breaths in the locker room to see what Van would say, only for the redhead to wordlessly hand you another towel before telling the story of how she got a jagged scar on her ankle from some stupid kid throwing his toy truck out on the field. It was the first time most of the hires had heard you laugh.

Tai was subtle about her curiosity bordering on kindness. Taissa was the first person to come to Jackie after practice and matches to whisper every flaw she noticed in everyone's performance, highlighting where everybody could improve for the captain to parrot back to the team. Always too busy ensuring everyone's future success to celebrate the current one. But she always made sure to navigate to you after everyone had shared compliments and cheers, she gently grabs you by the forearm to tell you how she noticed you weren’t all their on the field, intently listening to whatever problem you had in your personal life and giving you tips to use your emotions to work harder out on the field.

It was clear that things were different with the three of you when Mari spots you squished between them on the porch at some stupid jocks party, your bare legs swinging back and forth while you sit on a porch swing drunk and giggling at something Van whispers in your ear as Tai wordlessly puts some of your messy hair back into a bun, already preparing for when the cheap alcohol will eventually make you sick.

You were a set trio before long.

One of the downsides were your parents, throwing questioning looks when you skipped breakfast to hurry to Tai’s car for a ride to school in the morning or came home late after curfew in Van's beat up old truck. You knew if they knew about Tai and Van's… attraction to one another that they'd throw another fit about you being roped back into the wrong crowd, no matter how well Van made your dad laugh or how many times your mother complimented Taissa's accomplishments.

So you had to keep whatever was going on between you three a secret. And truly, there was no better way to describe what was happening. You had told them about your sexuality one night after one too many bears while you all sat in the hood of Van's truck and looked up at the scars, the words spilling out of your mouth before you could catch yourself. You had a strong inkling that they were similar, only confirmed when Tai made a comment about her ‘gaydar never failing her once.’

They'd shared with you the secret of their own relationship and it made your bond with them all the strong. Yet lately it felt…intense, intimate in a way that burned in your chest and made your thoughts and words get sloppy.

You caught yourself being incredibly touchy, seeking their comfort away from prying eyes because you knew they'd always reciprocate. Remembered the time you made a joke about how you've probably forgotten how to kiss someone after forgoing it for so long and Van joking about ‘giving you some practice’, recalled when Tai wordlessly fixed your skirt from riding up in the bathroom , her slim hands lingering on your hips.

Yeah. Really normal friendship.

It comes to a head on a chilled winter night when Tai invites the both of you over for a sleepover . Immediately your brain is ringing alarm bells, not only because you know your parents are only going to grow more suspicious of you having sleepovers on school nights but also because a sleepover with two teenage lesbians doesn’t exactly seem like the place you’d want to third wheel. But Tai has a way of convincing you to do anything, so on a Thursday night you have a bag packed and avoid your parents questions when you head outside for a ride with Van.

The night starts well, you get to have a brief chat with the Turners before they head off for some lengthy business trip, the both of them having a brief talk with Tai about the house rules before she ushers them out of the door. She orders a pizza, you all laugh while watching one of Van’s movie recommendations in the living room, and end the night all fallen asleep on Tai’s bed after talking about stupid gossip.

Yet you cant sleep, your skin buzzing whenever you arm brushes against Tai’s or Van’s socked foot grazes over your leg. A small part of your brain dares to hope it means something, that they wordlessly moved you in between them because they were making a bold move. But maybe they were just touchy, or they saw you as a needed fried who understood them better than everyone else on the team could.

You’re dragged out of your thoughts when a smooth brown hands glides up your neck, resting on your cheek before adjusting your eyes to look into Taissa’s. A jolt of heat runs up your spine at the look in her hooded eyes, longing and fear mixed together. Before you can ask her what’s going on she pushes her lips onto yours. For a few seconds your brain is spinning, stalling with the realization that Taissa Turner is kissing you in her bed. You don’t get a chance to come back to yourself before she’s pulling away, licking her lips with a furrowed brow.

“Tai, what are you - what about -”

“Jesus, Tai, now?” A raspy voice sounds from behind you, a blistered hand resting over your hip and gently tugging you backwards. “Thought you were gonna do this earlier. Probably sent her into shock, now.”

“Hush, she’s not in shock,” Tai guides your eyes back to hers, “Are you, Y/N?”

You wish you could say something but instead you’re frozen, staring wide eyed at on the girls you’ve had a crush on for weeks after she just kissed you while her girlfriend is behind you feeling you up. It takes a few more long seconds before you can urge yourself to speak.

“I’m…so confused right now?”

Van chuckles, scooting forward so her body is completely pressed to yours. “Don’t tell me you didn’t realize how we felt about you. You think we bring all our friends into bed like this?”

“I-I thought we were just being frien-”

”The pair make eye contact and fail to hold in their laughter. After thinking it over you start laughing, too. God, what a stereotype you are.

“Now that it’s established we were actually flirting with you…how are you feeling?” Tai asks. the whisper of her breath ghosting over your lips.

You want to tell them everything, every time they made your heart flutter or breath catch, how you felt when they called you in the middle of the night just to see how you were feeling before a match, how you felt safer with them than you knew how to deal with.

Instead you kiss Tai again. It’s not sweet and hesitant like before, its the intense culmination of everything you’ve been feeling, everything you’ve wanted to say. Taissa kisses you back quickly, gripping the side of your face to pull you into her impossibly closer. A soft moan escapes her throat when you drag a hand up her sides, and a stuttered groan leaves yours when you feel Van continue to grope you from behind.

When you stop the kiss to breathe Tai moves so she can pepper kisses across your face, quickly moving them down until she’s biting and nipping at your neck, a pleased smile gracing her lips when you start to moan underneath her.

“Holy shit.” Van gasps, the sight of Tai slowly wrecking you clearly getting to her. She wastes no time in kissing you, quickly pushing her tongue in your mouth and swirling it around yours.

For the next hour you continued like that, wrapped up in bliss and desire before you all fall asleep in each other arms.

When you wake the next morning you feel giddy, bashfully avoiding eye contact as you get dressed before joining them on the ride to school. You try to calm yourself in the car, reminding yourself that the world outside won’t be as accepting of your feelings. You put on your game face before bidding the girls goodbye, but throughout the day you cant help but notice how some of your classmates give you small smirks and the oddly knowing look.

It isn’t until Misty comes up to you in the locker room that you realize why, looking down to see your necklace has been replaced with Tai’s initial necklace, her name is classy gold letters across your neck.

When you look at her from across the room, all she does is wink.