#van x reader

Beads of sweat formed at the top of your forehead while you tapped your pen against the wooden desk of the auditorium. The sun burned hot outside, making the room a strange mix of moist and the kind of warm-dry that made you wanna bang your head against the wall. You glanced at your phone again— 5PM. Still an hour of class left. But how could you focus on fucking psychology and the stupid Oedipus complex when you knew that in less than an hour you’d be seeing your girlfriend.

Your relationship with Van was still relatively new. You managed to strike up conversation with her after renting the same copy of “But I’m a Cheerleader” over and over again. Were there other ways to get her attention? Probably. But she was yours now and that’s what mattered.

You let your mind wander for the rest of the class— you stopped listening twenty minutes ago anyway. Wander to how her skin feels on yours, the first time she kissed you outside your local gay bar. How she, despite your various protests, always managed to pay the tab when the two of you went out for drinks— going as far as bribing the waiter.

You missed her, you wondered what she was doing right now. Had she left the shop yet to come pick you up? Or, was she using those same fingers of hers you loved so much to organise the various VHS tapes she owned.

The sun burned hot on your skin while you waited for Van’s Jeep to pull up to the side of the building. You glanced sideways and saw one of the girls in your class side eyeing you— but it wasn’t just any girl, it wasn’t just any ordinary classmate taking Psych I, it was the same insufferable blonde that always went to Van’s video store to make eyes at her. It made you sick.

A loud honk snaps you out of your tamper tantrum and you’re met with a Jeep Grand Wagoneer right in front of you, with one smiley redhead inside. Your eyes meet the blonde girls’ ones before you open the door and— without so much as a hello— place a hard kiss on Van’s mouth before shutting the door behind you. A deep, hot pit of jealousy and something akin to pride settling deep inside your gut.

Van chuckled at the unexpectancy of the kiss— but she didn’t pull you away, didn’t even say anything before she started driving away. She only spoke once you were settled on the passenger's seat. Eyes trained on the road ahead.

“So, wanna tell me what that was about?” She teased, a shy smile making its way onto her pale lips.

“What was what?” You ask innocently, you realise that you’ve been caught, embarrassingly so. But you weren’t about to let her win this so damn easily. You still had your pride and some of your dignity.

“The whole kissin’ me like that thing? Hey I’m not complainin’ just curious is all” Van offers. Waving a white flag in all directions, a peace offering, for those with eyes to see.

You bite your lower lip and ponder telling her the truth, telling her that you were jealous— probably irrationally so. But you didn’t want her to be mad at you. Didn’t want her to think you were some possessive freak. But, you also knew a relationship couldn’t be built on lies. So, against your better judgement, you told her about the blonde girl on the steps of your college, the same one that was on Van’s shop the other day, making eyes at her.

Van looked at you for two solid seconds before bursting out laughing, her head hit the head rest behind her while her hands gripped the steering wheel tightly, you could tell she was trying her damned hardest to calm down and not crash the car.

But you weren’t laughing, you didn’t think it was funny and she stopped laughing once she realised you were serious about this— or, well, tried to, at least. “I’m sorry, I’m sorry it’s not funny. It’s not! Ok, it is… a little bit. I mean— I couldn’t even tell you what her name is and here you are imagining epic Oscar winning romances.” She lets out another dry chuckle. Like it had been stuck in her throat “I’m sorry, I really am.” Van confessed between broken fits of laughter.

“You’re always all smiley at her!” You protest further, losing your credibility in the process.

“Baby, I’m ‘smiley’ as you put it with everyone, that's how business works can’t be all stone faced at the counter otherwise folks won’t come in. Doesn’t mean I’m interested in… whoever that was…”

You don’t respond. And sulk further down the leather seat.

Van sighs, loudly. One of her hands leaves the soft material of the steering wheel and finds its place in the middle of your thigh. “C’mon baby will you lighten up?” Van begged, a hint of exasperation coating her otherwise melodic voice.

Your eyes find hers and your lips curl into a shy smile. You feel a wave of heat coating your face— having a delayed reaction to your own stupidity. Van would never do that. She couldn’t. She’s too soft. Too trusting. Too loving. Like a golden retriever— almost.

You interlock your fingers with hers and rest your hand there, in the middle of your own leg. One. Two. Three seconds before you start guiding her hand over the expanse of your jean covered thigh, until her fingers are grazing the zipper of your trousers.

Van’s eyes leave the road for a second too long in order to look over the expanse of your body. Her face went from concentration to hot, all consuming lust. “You’re gonna make me stop the car aren’t you?” She asks, more to herself than to you.

You don’t respond. And she doesn’t speak further before parking the jeep by the side of the road. Van unlocks your seatbelt in a fast, trained, fluid motion before your legs are placed on each side of her open legs.

The head rest makes a thump noise when your lips collide with hers, a kiss so fervent it could match the millions you’ve seen on screen with her sitting beside you on the couch. Your tongue finds her bottom lip, running over it and poking at her mouth for entrance. Once given, your tongues interlock in a familiar dance of heat, the same dance you’ve been at for months, the one you’d gladly be in for the rest of your life.

“See.” Van starts, her nose running over the skin of your neck, like a sharpie drawing over a rough piece of paper. “Nothing to be jealous of, gorgeous.” She finishes, her lips closing over your pulse point.

You feel your eyes close while she works her magic on your neck. Your hips press further into hers, drawing out whatever friction you can get from the rough material of your trousers hitting your center when the angle is just right.

Van chuckles at your struggle, darkly. More sardonic than usual. “Let me help you out sweetheart.” She whispers close to your ear, before removing both your jeans and your panties in one swift motion.

Your underwear ends up tangled in your trousers somewhere in the back seat while you’re left half straddling Van wearing nothing but your bra and a white tank top. Van hums, a mix of certainty and delight before she palms your sides and makes you sit in one of her thighs and… Wait. When did her jeans come off?

Your wet cunt makes contact with the taught skin of her pale thigh before you’re moving up and down the smooth expand of her skin. Your pussy grows wetter by the minute while your juices spread over her skin. Marking her. Making her yours for all to see— or at least the cars that are on that same road.

“Still jealous, gorgeous?” Van asks, more mocking than pure unbridled curiosity.

You don’t respond, you can’t, too focused on grinding up and down her leg. The sensation is good. Really good and some sick possessive part of you likes marking her with your slick. But it’s not enough and you’re growing frustrated— stuck in a weird place where the stimulation you’re receiving is simply not enough.

Van notices this, she always notices everything. Perfect, attentive, lovable idiot she truly is. Her hands go from your ass to the middle of your waist holding you up so her hand could slip inside you. You go slack on the spot, the tension on your shoulders dissipate while your head tilts back and your lips part in an “O” shape.

Van pumps her fingers inside you, all practiced strokes and smooth movements while she explores your insides with such tender care that it would bring the you from a couple months ago to tears.

Her palm finds your clit, applying pressure to the little bundle of nerves while her middle and index finger pump inside your body.

The dual stimulation makes your orgasm over her fingers in record time, covering another part of her body with your juices. Leaving them sticky and iridescent to the sun that pokes from the glass windows of her car. She removes her fingers from inside of you carefully, before presenting them to you. Waiting for you to clean up your mess.

Your lips find her digits almost immediately. Wrapping around her fingers and sucking off your own arousal like you were born and raised to do it. You swipe your tongue over each crevice of her fingers, not leaving one drop behind. The erotic scene makes your hips start up their grinding motion against her thigh again. Moving on their own accord on top of Van’s naked skin while cars passed by the two of you.

Van looked down at the spot where your cunt met her bare skin, her lips curled into a half smile. “Never satisfied are you?” She asked, with no malice in her voice.

“Shut up.”

Was all you said before resuming your movements atop Van’s naked thigh.

🏷️ @glassypze @wond3rland13 @mchailover @marieeme @fragileweirdooo @conamoney-11 @vanpalmersnumberonefan @watersapple @alyversev @sillyemanusz @ludoesartandstuff @mangoslayy9 @stupidcupid28 @ilovelightningmcqueen @lovekenney

“Yes Van!” Your breath was visible as you cheered at a great save by the keeper, sitting on the bleachers in the cold morning air. It started off simple, going to watch your friend’s games as an excuse to get out of the house, something you didn’t do often enough. She liked having a ride there, and admittedly it was nice knowing someone was at the game for her.

So, you found yourself there week in and week out, sitting amongst the crowd watching her, cheering when her team had won, and smiling when she found you after the game. Though it became a little more difficult when you started smiling wider each time.

You made your way to the sideline, Van meeting you halfway, still in her gear.

“Good game, Palmer.” She punched your arm in response - softly, but it might as well have been with full force, feeling your skin burn at the contact.

“Thanks, give me a minute, then we’ll get out of here?” You nodded, watching her flash a toothy grin and turn away to head to the locker room. It had become tradition to get food afterwards, initially another reason to avoid your home lives, but it quickly turned into something you were excited for.

You couldn’t help but find her endearing, the way she talked about her favourite movies and laughed at the jokes that no one else seemed to get. You had begun to think about her more often than not.

“Hey, wake up! Someone’s gotta drive me around and it’s not going to be me.” You snapped out of your thoughts, finding Van standing in front of you, dressed in fresh clothes and staring at you expectantly. She could drive herself, she just didn’t have the car, aside from some junk of a truck she claimed to be working on.

You rolled your eyes, struggling to ignore the familiar flutter in your chest as you walked side by side through the carpark.

You tried not to laugh too hard as she pondered, in all seriousness, about where to get food, listing all the places she could “force” you to take her. You reached your car, putting her debate to an end with a sigh.

“Are you done? I’ve got a leftover pizza and an empty house, just come to mine.” She shrugged in approval, that option good as any - cheaper too.

You drove back to yours, focusing on the road in an attempt to ignore her gaze while she recounted the match, as if you hadn’t been there watching.

The reason your dynamic worked so well was partially due to how much she talked and how little you did. You could happily sit and listen to her speak all day, admiring the way she passionately lit up. That’s just the way you liked it.

“Then their winger, pretty girl with the ribbons, took a shot but obviously I saved it, and-“ your chest tightened at the word. Pretty. She was pretty, but hearing Van say it still made your grip on the steering wheel double. The worst part about crushing on your closest friend was when you were reminded of how that’s all you were.

She must have noticed a change in your demeanour, mumbling off until you were driving in silence.

*✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:

“Cold? What am I, an animal?” Van feigned disapproval as you dropped the pizza box in between you two on your bed.

“Please, I’ve seen you eat worse.” She scoffed in agreement, a slice already half-eaten in her hand. You could still feel the tension lingering, somehow unable to let the jealousy go like you normally could.

God, all she did was call a girl pretty… and she was pretty! Your jaw clenched between bites, zoned out and staring at your crossed legs.

“Dude… are you good?”

Shit.

You flicked your eyes up at hers, a teasing yet concerned look on her face, snapping you out of it real quick.

You should just be grateful she’s your friend.

“Uh… yep all good, just remembered I have some English homework to finish.” It’s not a complete lie, you really did, but it was only an excuse to hide the fact you were feeling unreasonably jealous over the tiniest thing.

“Who cares about that?” She shrugged, her smirk increasing as she looked at you, “we have bigger problems, like who’s gonna eat the last slice.”

You rolled your eyes, relieved she dropped the topic - whether she believed you or not.

Smiling, you grabbed the pizza, “me, duh.”

Van gasped in offence, quickly leaning to grab it out of your hand, falling and pushing both of you backwards onto your mattress. She was practically on top of you, one hand on your wrist, the other next to your head as she stared down at you. You felt goosebumps travel up your sides, her legs on either side of your hips, trapping you.

She was too close, surely able to notice the redness growing on your cheeks, the way you instinctively licked your lips.

“Fine, just take it. I really should do that homework…” your words came out panicked, eyes wide before she rolled onto her back next to you.

“Geez, it’s not like I was going to kiss you.” She was trying to joke, you knew that, but her horrible misinterpretation of your panic only made you feel worse.

“Right.”

You settled at your desk, barely focusing on your homework as Van flipped through your collection of cds to fill the silence. You felt her staring at your back, fighting every urge to turn and look at her.

She finally settled on your bed again, remaining mostly quiet other than a couple murmured song lyrics.

By the time you were done, you found her asleep. Your cat - God knows when he got there, purring next to her.

Oh?

She’d only been at your house a handful of times, never long enough to take a nap. Sure, you two were close, but this was new.

You couldn’t wake her, not when she looked so peaceful. Instead, you put on a softer cd, grabbed a book, and sat carefully on your bed next to her. Deciding to distract yourself by reading instead of watching her like some creep.

*✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:

You noticed her finally starting to stir from the corner of your eye, closing your book as she sat up. You couldn’t help the faint blush on your face as you watched her wake up, her eyes readjusting to the afternoon sun, brushing her hair out of her face.

She was pretty. The kind of boyish pretty that maybe made the feelings you had for her ok. But you knew that’s not how it worked; she was still your best friend.

“I completely passed out, huh? I’m sorry, you should’ve woken me.”

You shook your head dismissively, you really didn’t mind, plus, it was better than the awkward tension from before.

Checking the time, her eyebrows furrowed as she cursed under her breath.

“I’ll drive you,” you offered like she had other options, and she thanked you as if she wasn’t going to force you anyway.

*✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:

To your relief, the tension was forgotten as you drove, listening to her talk, this time about a party one of her teammates was hosting.

“You should come, it’ll be fun!”

Van was about ten times more extroverted than you, and you knew she had good intentions, but you weren’t sure you’d be up for it.

Parties were fine until Van was busy socialising with everyone she could, leaving you to awkwardly stand around and hope to run into another friend.

She could see your hesitation, pushing your arm gently as her voice turned more teasing, “come onnnnn, maybe you’ll meet someone.”

Your face flushed, that’s the opposite of what you wanted. You wouldn’t meet anyone you were interested in, instead, you were afraid she would.

She was often sought out by girls at parties, either as some demeaning experiment or just a good time. Meanwhile you were shrugging off anyone who tried to come near you, waiting for Van to reappear, pretending you didn’t know what she was doing for your own sake.

“No thanks.” You shook your head, dismissing the idea, the whole thing making you feel ill with jealousy again.

She sighed, unsure why you were acting so closed off.

And just like that, the tension had returned, creating a thick, uncomfortable silence until you pulled up to her house. You refused to look at her, sitting facing ahead, half expecting her to just get out and leave without a word.

“Ok seriously. What’s up with you? You’ve been acting weird all day, did I do something?”

No, she hadn’t done anything wrong, it was all you and your dumb brain. You had no right to be jealous, no excuse for the possessiveness you felt.

“I-“ you didn’t know what to say, turning your body to face hers but still avoiding her gaze.

“Did I make you uncomfortable before? I’m sorry if-“

“No. No, Van, not at all,” you didn’t want her to think that about herself, blushing at the memory, “it’s just… I hate the way you talk about pretty girls and how you run away at parties doing God knows what with God knows who. It shouldn’t, but it makes me feel like shit.”

You finally looked up at her, wishing your seat would swallow you whole after your nervous word vomit.

“What, you’re jealous?” She asked like it was unfathomable, still not quite getting the point. “You’ll meet someone, I’m telling you. You just have to go out and actually talk to people.”

Were you jealous of her? No. Were you jealous of the girls she got with? Yes… very much so.

“No, Van.”

There was no going back, feeling your heart pound as you spoke, watching her every expression.

“I don’t want to meet someone. I’m not jealous that you find pretty girls at parties and kiss them. I wish… just... I like you... why can't it be me with you?"

You’d done it now. Spilt your guts and probably lost the best friendship you’d ever had. You would’ve run if you weren’t in your own car, internally cringing as you watched the way Van seemed to process your words.

“Oh.”

“Never mind… I’m sorry,” you apologised before she could say anything else, offering to drive her home again. But she grabbed your wrist before you could turn back in your seat.

She leant over to reach you, her face close to yours. Her expression was unreadable, a mix of curiosity and something else you couldn’t quite decode.

“You want me to kiss you? That’s why you’ve been in a shitty mood?” Her voice was soft, inching closer to you without breaking eye contact.

Your eyes fluttered closed as her hand moved to hold your chin. “It’s stupid…” looking back up at her, hoping that if you dismissed it, it would all go away.

“Doesn’t sound stupid to me.” She was smiling again, that familiar smirk on her lips. “Now do you want me to or not?”

You paused, eyes wide with shock before softly nodding against her hand, of course you did. Your eyes flicked down to her mouth as you met her halfway, feeling her lips graze yours tentatively.

It was soft - better than you’d imagined, and you couldn’t stop a muffled sigh from escaping against her lips. Her hand moved up your face, settling on your cheek while the other rested gently on your knee.

Grabbing a fistful of her t-shirt, you readjusted yourself to move closer to her, overwhelmed by the way her tongue brushed against your lower lip.

She pulled back just enough to look at you, your heart nearly exploding in your chest as she tucked a stray piece of hair behind your ear.

“Happy now?”

You laughed but the blush on your face gave yourself away.

She could tell it was more than just simply wanting her to kiss you, the feelings going deeper than that.

Your skin felt a little colder as you lost her touch, the redhead dropping back into her seat.

“You could’ve just asked, you know?”

Still a flustered mess, you watched her sit back, that dumb smirk of hers returning.

You noticed her fiddling with her hands the way she did when she was nervous. “I didn’t think you liked girls like that… I didn’t think you liked me like that.” Her voice was quiet as she confessed, “I would’ve jumped at the chance earlier if I did.”

You blushed an even deeper red at her words.

“Well, I do like you like that.” It was her turn to blush and your heart ached at the way she looked at you.

“I think I’d like to kiss you again.”

“Really?” You barely believed her words, even as she leant over to your seat again.

She laughed at your disbelief, “yes, idiot.”

Her hand snaked around to rest at the back of your neck, pulling you closer, still searching for any sign of hesitation.

When she found none, her eyes dropped down to your lips, licking her own before she closed the distance between the two of you.

It was a little rougher the second time around, less uncertain as her other hand found your own, holding it tightly. You gasped into her mouth at the way she gripped your hair, allowing her to deepen the kiss.

You were a little dizzy when you pulled away, resting against her forehead, still processing how any of it was real.

“Let me take you out. I’m tired of dragging you to my games just as an excuse to see you.”

You nodded in agreement, and by that point, the blush on your face might as well have been permanent.

She let out a breath of relief, glad you were on the same page. You watched her as she shut her eyes, pressing against you before pulling away, squeezing your hand only to let go.

She hopped out of your car with a promise to call you.

You watched her walk off, lips burning and craving her. You didn’t miss the way she subtly turned to smile at you, she could clearly tell how insane she was driving you, but you wouldn’t have had it any other way.

taglist 💌: @callsignwidow

You were already lying on her bed when Van walked back into her room, tank top off, sports bra discarded somewhere on the floor. Her mouth had that crooked grin, the one she used when she was being smug, or when she was about to do something she knew you’d never forget.

Your stomach fluttered. Not from nerves, not really, more like anticipation wrapped tight with want. Firsts weren’t something you rushed with someone like Van. She took her time, even when she teased like she wouldn’t.

“You look nervous,” she said, standing at the edge of the bed, arms crossed under her bare chest. “You should be.”

You gave her a look. “Real comforting, Van. Thanks.”

She laughed, but it was low and quiet, and she leaned down, climbing onto the bed to straddle your hips. “I’m kidding. Kind of.” Her fingers brushed a strand of hair from your face, then curled under your jaw. “You’re lucky you’re cute.”

You rolled your eyes, but you were smiling. “You’re the one who begged me to sleep over.”

“Oh, yeah,” she said, voice dropping as her eyes scanned your face. “Because I love sleeping.”

She kissed you before you could say anything else, slow at first, a test, her hand on your cheek and her body settling against yours like she was already memorizing how you fit together. Then deeper, her mouth moving with more heat, tongue brushing yours, her other hand slipping down between your bodies.

“You ready?” she asked, whispering the words against your jaw. “We don’t have to—”

“I want to,” you said, breath catching. “I do.”

She pulled back enough to see your face, eyes serious now beneath all that nonchalance. “You tell me if anything hurts, okay?”

You nodded.

“And you tell me if you want to stop.”

You nodded again, softer this time. “Okay.”

Van kissed you again, then got up, crawling off the bed and walking to her drawer like she’d done this before, like she was cool and calm, but her hands weren’t as steady as usual when she buckled the harness, and her ears were pink.

She caught your gaze in the mirror and smirked. “What? Don’t act like you’re not into this.”

You snorted. “You’re not subtle, Palmer.”

“Never said I was.”

She climbed back onto the bed, her hands warm on your thighs as she settled between them. The toy stood proud against her stomach, black and thick and intimidating, but her voice was soft again when she looked down at you. “Breathe. I’ll go slow.”

The first touch was careful, fingers first, her mouth still on yours as she coaxed your body open, whispering quiet praise in between the teasing.

“Already soaked for me?” she murmured, mouth at your ear. “Fuck, you are easy.”

You let out a breathy sound, part embarrassed, part turned on, your hips twitching under her. “Van—”

“I like it,” she said, grinning now. “You think I don’t get off on knowing I make you feel like this?”

She pushed in slow, the toy thick and filling, her hand gripping your hip to steady you. You gasped, legs tensing, but her other hand came up to cradle your face.

“You’re okay,” she said, her voice dipping into something lower, sweeter. “You’re doing so good.”

Your fingers gripped her forearm, grounding yourself as she rocked her hips once, gently, experimentally, and the stretch made you whimper.

“There she is,” Van breathed. “Taking me so well.”

She moved a little more now, each thrust careful but more certain. Her eyes never left your face, watching every expression like she was studying you, like nothing else mattered but how you felt.

“You want it faster?” she asked, breath catching a little. “Want me to fuck you like I’ve been dreaming about all week?”

You moaned, nails digging into her skin. “Yes.”

She grinned. “I knew you were filthy.”

And she gave it to you— slow at first, then faster, deeper, fucking you into her sheets while her hand slid under your shirt to cup your breast, thumb brushing your nipple until you arched under her.

Eventually you cry out, unraveling under her touch, your body clenching around the strap as Van rocks you through it. Her movements slow, deliberate again, like she wants to drag it out. Like she wants to make sure you remember exactly who made you feel like this.

She kissed you through it, through the breathy sounds you made, through the way your body shook around her. She didn’t stop until your legs trembled and your hands clutched at her shoulders.

When she finally pulled out and collapsed beside you, sweaty and breathless, her arm came around your waist, tugging you close.

You curled into her, heart still pounding.

Van pressed a kiss to your temple. “Told you you’d survive.”

You laughed into her neck. “Barely.”

“Worth it though?”

You tilted your head up to meet her smug grin. “Yeah. Worth it.”

Van brushed your hair back, fingers soft now. “Good. ‘Cause next time, I’m not going so easy on you.”

You flushed, but you didn’t look away. “Promise?”

Her eyes darkened a little, a grin on her lips. “You really are filthy.”

We stood in a circle, but it didn’t feel like one. Circles are supposed to be safe. Closed. Equal. This wasn’t that. It was uneven, jagged—like the shape had been broken and hammered back into place. Cold seeped through the animal skin and unusual outfits that everyone wore during their hunts.

My fingers itched against the hilt of the dull knife at my side. Not to use it. Just to feel it. To have a sense of safety I shift my left foot to my right fidgeting with my fingers on my left hand

Mari was across from me. Her hair was pulled back, jaw locked, eyes half-lidded in that way that looked bored but meant the opposite. She always looked like she was about to say something sharp. I meet her eyes.

We weren’t touching. But she kept glancing at me, and I kept looking back.Everyone knew about us. We weren’t secret. But I don’t need to be with her all the time I can feel her presence from a mile away like she’s a part of me, a part of my soul.

A wind moved through the trees—long, low, curling—and the sound of it stirred something deep in the group. The way dogs start whining before a storm.

misty took a step forward. The deck was in it. Worn playing cards, stained in places I didn’t want to think too hard about.Everyone quieted. You could feel the silence pressing down on our skin.

One by one, the cards started to pass.

I watched each girl as she drew—quiet, cautious, fingers twitching as they turned the cards over looking at it then turning it to the group. each time i see their face relax, like a weight has been lifted off they’re shoulders. i could just feel a bigger weight on mine. my chances to get the card are higher.

van first, then natalie, lottie. who almost looked disappointed, taissa.

And then it came to Mari’s turn. but Shauna steps beside her and Taissa.

“Shauna you don’t have to take any extra risk. you can go back to you’re spot. ”taissa spoke

shauna smirks, tilting her head slightly. “how’d you get into AP stats? it doesn’t change the odds. besides. i trust whatever it wills. Misty, keep going.” she looks back to the group. Mari spoke up. “No, go back to your spot. That’s not how this works, you get what you get.” Shauna grins at her, and looks eyes with you. she knows something. her shit eating grin doesn’t flatten. “Misty, the cards.”

Her hand didn’t hesitate.

she took the card holding it up to the group, a smug look on her face. she’s safe. Mari gives her a nasty look.

Mari looked at me.

Just for a second.

Then, without a word, she reached her hand forward. grabbing the card, her breath stuck in her chest. But, Her expression didn’t change. She turned it over with two fingers. The motion was almost lazy.

The Queen of Hearts stared up at us.

And nobody breathed. van gave her a sorrowful look. Mari almost wanted to put the card back and refuse to play. like a little kid you say’s they’re not playing anymore after they get tagged.

“Oh…tough break. Mar. take off your cape.” the steps in-front of her. a nasty look on her face. Mari bite her lip, looking at me. Almost like she needs reassurance, but I can’t help. she begins to untie her cape. refusing eye contact as Shauna put’s what once was the lucky necklace that jackie gave her, now is just full of bloodshed. she start’s to count, Smiling.

“one…Two.” Mari lounges at her with a knife she swiped from Shauna’s side, as van and some others hold Shauna back. while gen, Akilah and me help Mari up from the ground she was just thrown on. my hand goes right to her’s. she returns the gesture with a squeeze. “you’re going to be fine, okay. every thing will be fine.” i say breathing heavily. I’m not sure if I’m trying to convince me or her that it’s going to be okay. “Better Me then you, right?” she pulls me into a short hug the side of my cheek resting on her shoulder.

Lottie speaks up. “Three, Four, Five, Six….” She look’s towards Shauna who lets out a small laugh.

Mari cuts Lottie and Shauna off. “You deserve everything that’s coming to you!” she let’s go of my hand, running towards the wood’s. Mari didn’t look back as she began her sprint, weaving through the trees with that eerie, calculated grace. Her figure was a blur of movement.

Lottie Keeps counting as everyone sits there and watches.

everyone gets there weapons. i don’t move to grab any, i don’t need any.

Mari is far ahead of me.

She always is, in some way or another—quicker with comebacks, faster on her feet, somehow always a step ahead even when she’s pretending not to care. I lose sight of her somewhere after the second ridge. Just flashes of movement now, the white of her dress darting between trees like a flicker of lightning in a dark sky.

It feels like it’s been hours. Or maybe minutes. The woods stretch and bend time around you until nothing makes sense except the pounding in your chest and the cold gnawing your fingers.

There are others behind me—I can hear them. The loud breathing, the slap of feet against frozen earth, rustling fabric and muffled voices. But they all feel distant now.

I don’t know what I’ll do when I reach her. I don’t know if I’m supposed to stop her or hide her or just… see her. Make sure she’s okay. the second Shauna forced that switch with Mari, She didn’t even react. No wide eyes, no trembling hands. Just that dead expression. Blank, almost bored. Like she was already somewhere else.

And then she ran.

in the same direction of the pit me and Travis set up, The pit she once fell into, but has no memory or where it is. and the pit that’s completely covered, filled with wooden spikes.

i skid across a patch of ice under the snow and nearly fall. I don’t stop. I’ve already lost too much time. My lungs burn. My hands are numb. My thighs ache with every sprint uphill, and my throat feels like I swallowed glass—but I keep going.

Somewhere ahead, a branch cracks.

I spin toward the sound. There—movement, sudden and sharp. I catch the shape of her, just her back, the white dress bright against the dark trees. She’s stripped everything else off—her jacket, her pants, her boots. Left a trail like breadcrumbs.

I push harder.

“Mari!” I shout.

She doesn’t stop. Doesn’t turn.

Of course not. She probably thinks I’m someone else. One of the others. Another girl high on frenzy and frostbite, chasing down blood in the name of ritual. Maybe part of her still doesn’t believe I’m not one of them too. Maybe part of me doesn’t know.

She slips between two evergreens. I veer right to intercept her, trying to circle around. My boots sink deeper into the snow, and I stumble but recover. I hear her breathing now, quick and sharp. She’s close, too close.

i can see her running from the side, i just need to speed up. I come up beside her, angling from the left—not directly behind, not where she’ll expect. She’s not even looking in my direction. She’s focused on moving forward, on outpacing whatever madness is nipping at her heels.

It’s just snow. A patch of it, like all the others. Soft and untouched. Quiet. There’s no warning. No edge. No dark hole in the ground. “Mari!” I yell.

She doesn’t hear me. Or maybe she ignores me. She’s too focused. Too fast. Her foot lifts—she’s about to step into it.

I throw myself sideways and Time slows.

My shoulder slams into her ribs. Her breath leaves her in a grunt. I watch her stumble, caught off balance, arms flailing. Her bare feet scrape across the snow. She falls sideways, not forward. into the whiteness.

I hit the ground hard beside her. Hard enough to make my vision rattle.

But I keep moving.

I’m rolling. Something shifts beneath me—like a breath held too long suddenly letting go. The snow caves. The earth disappears.

I slide.

No, I drop, i swear i could have felt Mari try to grab my hand. but It’s to cold to tell.

I open my eyes and try to move, but everything feels distant. My leg pulses with heat and pressure. Something’s crusted to the side of my head. My mouth tastes like copper and dirt. I blink again—slow. The light above has changed. Dimmer now. Or maybe my eyes are just fading on me.

I don’t know how long it’s been.

Minutes?

Long enough for the adrenaline to drain out of my veins and leave only the ache behind.

I hear footsteps.

Not imagined ones—real. Crunching snow, breathless voices, shapes moving at the edge of the pit. Someone swears. A sharp intake of breath.

She’s in there,” someone mutters.

“Is she moving?”

Another voice. Closer. Familiar.

Mari?

No. It’s not her. Not yet.

i hear Lottie’s voice cut through the air, and i could almost see her head looking down at me.

“i don’t think she’s going to survive, if she does then the wilderness rejected her, rejected them. the hunts called off.”

I try to say something, but it catches in my throat. My tongue is heavy. My body is heavier.

More noise now. Ropes. A branch cracking. Someone’s lowering something—maybe a jacket, maybe a rope tied together with scraps of fabric. I can’t tell.

“She’s bleeding—don’t yank her.”

“Careful—watch her leg.”

Mari’s voice cuts through it all, clear and too close.

“Move. You’re not touching her.”

It’s not a request.

And just like that, they do.

I feel her more than I see her. The shift of shadow. The snap of her breath in the cold air. from above the pit. Then her hands. Rough, shaking slightly. Warm. and then my eyes close.

When I wake up, I don’t know where I am.

There’s something heavy pressed to my leg. A weight. A dull pressure.

The ceiling is wooden. Slanted slightly. The air smells of blood, pine, and smoke. I’m in the hut, Mari’s hut. where is Mari?

I don’t remember how I got here. Only pieces. The cold. Mari’s voice. The feeling of being lifted, swaying. Maybe someone carried me. Maybe they used a sled or a tarp or their bare fucking arms. I don’t know.

My leg’s wrapped, tight. My hip aches like it’s been stabbed and sewn shut. I don’t look yet. I don’t want to see.

Mari’s sitting on the floor beside me, leaning against the wall. One knee up, one arm draped across it, her head tilted back—exhausted, but alert. Her eyes are half-closed. She hasn’t left.

Her jacket’s still off. Her hair’s a mess. There’s blood on her hands—not hers.

Mine.

She moves instantly, leaning forward, expression hard.

“You’re awake.”

It sounds like an accusation. But her voice is quieter than usual. Rough with something unspoken. “Hi,” I manage. It comes out hoarse.

“You fucking idiot,” she mutters, and looks away. And stands up. Staying in the same spot.

I try to push myself up a little, but the pain flares and Mari shoves me back with a hand against my shoulder—not gentle, not rough, just firm.

“You have a hole in your leg the size of a fist and you’re saying ‘hi’ like you tripped on a goddamn tree root? you could’ve died.”

“I saved you.”

“No, you almost died for me!”

That silences me. Not because I disagree, but because of the way she says it. Her voice breaks hard on the last word, and she turns away from me like she can’t stand to look at me right now.

“I saw you fall in. I thought you were dead. I thought—” She cuts off, swallowing something jagged. “There was blood everywhere. You weren’t moving. And I thought… That’s it. That’s the last time I’ll ever see you move.”

“Mari—”

“No. Shut up.” She turns back toward me, and this time her expression is all fire. “You don’t get to talk right now. You don’t get to make this okay. Because it’s not okay. You scared the shit out of me, and I hate you for it.”

I breathe in, trying to find the words. “i rather it be me the you. i helped you.”

Her hands ball into fists at her sides. “are you stupid? You think I want to feel like this? You think I like trying to get you out of a death trap. everyone else tried to help you get out. what if you did die? were you just gonna leave me alone with some kind of fucking survivors guilt?” There’s something wet in her voice now. Not tears yet, but close.

“They helped me out?” I ask gently.

“Yeah. Eventually. After I fucking snapped at them. Lottie kept saying you weren’t meant to survive.

“and you didn’t listen?” She scoffs. “I don’t listen when it comes to you.”

That shuts me up again.

We sit in silence for a long minute. Her hand drifts closer, fingers brushing mine. Not taking it—just near enough that I could if I wanted.

I do. She doesn’t pull away.

“what happened with the hunt?”

She snorts once—bitter. “they ended it. You crashing into a pit sort of ruined the mood.” I almost laugh, but my ribs hurt.

I squeeze her hand.

“I knew the pit was there, me and Travis came up with it. He was gonna come up with a plan to make Lottie walk on it. That’s how I knew it was close.”

“That’s pretty Dark, didn’t take you as somebody to do something like that.” she say’s Half joking.

She hasn’t let go of my hand.

Not really. Not fully.

Even when I shift a little, the pressure changes—less grip, more presence—but it’s still there. The way she anchors me. My whole body hurts, but it’s the kind of pain that tells you you’re not dead. The burn of healing starting too soon. My leg throbs, wrapped in something rough, and the bandages are already soaked through with the edge of blood. My side feels swollen and heavy, like the skin there isn’t mine.

But it’s Mari’s hand that keeps me grounded.

I try to adjust my breathing, but it stutters. She notices instantly. Her gaze flicks over me—sharp, assessing, worried in that way she pretends isn’t worry. “How bad is it?” I ask.

She doesn’t lie.

“You missed most of the spikes. But one caught the side of your thigh and it… it opened up deep. You lost a lot of blood. Honestly you’re lucky, there’s almost 0 Chance of you landing like you did.”

“And my waist?”

She hesitates. Her jaw tightens.

“You were lucky,” she mutters. “It tore through the side, but it didn’t hit anything vital. Or… at least I think it didn’t.”

“You think?”

“I’m not a doctor, genius.”

I try to smile. It doesn’t quite land.

“Still,” I say. “You got me out of there.”

She looks away, jaw working like she’s chewing through guilt.

“you didn’t hesitate. You didn’t think.” Her voice sharpens. “You just threw yourself in after me like some kind of—”

She cuts herself off, breath ragged. Her eyes go glossy again, but she blinks it back fast.

I want to say something. I want to tell her I’d do it again. That it wasn’t a decision, it was instinct. That there’s never been a single second since we crashed here where I wouldn’t risk everything for her. But the words get stuck. Not because they aren’t true—because they’re too true.

Mari isn’t the type to let her guard down without a fight. So instead I say, “You were about to fall in. You didn’t see it. i got lucky.”

“No,” she says, low and certain. “You got hurt. That’s not being ‘lucky”

She finally meets my eyes again. And there’s something in hers I’ve only seen a few times before—back when she thought I was sleeping, or when she thought no one was watching. It’s not softness exactly. It’s more like fury at the idea of losing me. “I didn’t know if you were going to wake up.”

“I didn’t know either,” I whisper. When she finally speaks, it’s lower. Rougher. “You keep doing this. Putting yourself in the fire like it’s your job to make sure the rest of us come out okay. And I love you for it and I fucking hate you for it.”

The words land like a punch. I can barely hold them.

“You love me?” I whisper.

Mari finally meets my eyes again—and there’s no escape in her gaze now. Just rage, exhaustion, and something too bright to name.

“You already knew that,” she says. “Don’t pretend you didn’t.”

I try to reach for her, but my fingers shake. She sees it, and without another word, she takes my hand and presses it flat against her chest. Her heartbeat thuds against my palm. Unsteady. Real.

“You’re not allowed to die before me,” she says. “Got it?”

“I’ll try,”

she brushes her hand on the top of my head.

It’s not affection, not exactly. It’s something rawer than that. Like she’s holding me down so I don’t slip away again.

“Does it hurt?” she asks after a long pause.

“Yes.”

She nods, and I swear she looks almost relieved to hear it.

“Good,” she mutters. “Means you’re still alive, and you deserve it for being careless.”

“stop with the angry act. You stayed,” I say.

“Of course I did idiot.” she crosses her arm

I close my eyes.

It’s not peace. It’s not safety. Not here. But it’s something.

Mari, alive. Me, alive. Barely. Together.

The demonic roar of the engine failing echoing and shouting in your head. Not letting you ignore it. You feel someone grab your other hand and your wide eyes look to see Taissa who has tears streaming down her face. 

And as the plane finally makes its impact with the ground your hands somehow let go of the two girls. Natalie and you are buried in carry-ons and equipment from the overhead bins. Holding weight down on the both of you.

You attempt at getting your seatbelt off first. Trying to drown out your best friend’s cries as you struggle. 

“Here, here!” Taissa shoves off some of the mess on you, making it easier for you. “Thank you- thank you.” You choke out, the adrenaline in your body going rampant. Unclipping the belt before getting up, the girl who helped you has already moved away to help with the door. “I’m stuck- [Name]!” Natalie sobs and you shush her. 

“I’m here, I’m getting you out!” You tell her, grabbing the bigger things and throwing them in any direction. “I can’t get my, my leg!” She grunts and you look to see the heavier equipment in between her leg and the chair in front of her. 

“I got it, I got it!” You mutter, pulling with all your might and finally getting it out. 

Natalie shoots up after unhooking her belt and you move out of the way. “Go, go, go!” You scream, pushing her towards the door and doing the same with a few other girls.

“C’mon, c’mon!” You have them run before you, you look behind you to see Vanessa yelling and crying for help, fire bursting behind her. 

“Help! HELP!” She weeps, and you run over to her. Jumping over the stuff in the aisle. “Shit- I gotchu! Fuck it’s the seatbelt?” You furrow your brows, not knowing what to do to get it unjammed. Van cries, wriggling to get out.

“Please, please don’t leave me!” She says and you look up at her, scared. “I won’t, I promise!” You crouch down, the fire getting closer. Making it extremely hard to focus with the heat. 

Another body comes and you look up to see Shauna. “It’s her seatbelt!” You inform her, and Shauna pushes you back to try but she can’t get it either.

Jackie comes over and grabs Shauna, trying to do the same with you but you shrug her off. “We can’t leave her!” Shauna disagrees. “We have to get out now!” Jackie says. 

“I’m not leaving her!” You argue, crouching back down, looking around for something sharp or anything. Van cries harder, trying to wriggle around again.

You don’t even pay attention to Jackie wrestling Shauna away from the situation. Getting out of the plane.

“Stop moving real quick!” You tell the redhead who whimpers but does as told. 

You finally get the belt unjammed, unclipping it and you take hold of her hand, running as fast as you can away from the fire. 

To the other end, luckily right before a burst of flames come towards you both. “Shit, c’mere!” You pull her into seats to be protected from the heat. 

You hold onto her, to protect her from any more burns. Earning hairs on your arm being singed off, hurting like a bitch.

Tiredly you sit there for a moment, still not letting go of the redhead but leaning back in the chair as the fire has calmed down a bit. Not being near you at least. 

Your head falling against the cushion. “Holy shit.” You murmur to yourself, your body ached as the adrenaline was beginning to fade away. “You- you didn’t leave me…” Van pants and you huff. “I promised.” You remind her, she looks up at you and smiles. “We almost died.” 

“Yeah.” You breathe out a laugh. “Let’s get out of here.” You stand up, her doing the same thing, leading you guys out. Not even paying attention to the fact that you were both still holding hands. 

Getting out you hear screaming by Coach Ben and you follow it. Injured girls surround the area, also hearing Javi shouting for his dad. You had forgotten that Javi and Travis came on this trip with their father- your guys’ coach. 

“There was nothing we could do-” You come across Jackie trying to put her arm around Shauna but she twists away, uncomfortable.

“Jesus… Coach.” You glance around them, still not announcing you or Van still being alive. But seeing Coach on the ground with a crushed leg. 

Van rushes you in front of everyone. “Surprise.” She boredly announces the both of you and you awkwardly stand there. It was intense and shocking to Jackie. Before the three of you can get into it, Taissa launches at the both of you. Putting you both in a relieved bear hug.

“Thank god! I couldn’t find either of you! Scared the shit out of me.” She pulls back and you purse out your lips. “Sorry.” You mumble. “My seatbelt was jammed.” Vanessa explains. 

“You’re both okay though?” She checks both of our faces and you subconsciously hide your arm that was burning excruciatingly. And luckily for you something else caught their attention before they could even notice. 

A loud thwack! Emits from where Coach Ben is lying. You guys turn around to see Misty  with an axe. You forcibly make Van face the other way so she can’t even process what just happened. “What? The? Fuck!?” Natalie loudly exclaims as the curly blonde unbuckles her belt and kneels down. You watch in terror. 

Misty creates a tourniquet, looping it around Coach’s thigh and tightly pulling it. “Help me move him.” Misty orders. 

“What just happened?” Van’s eyes pool with tears. “C’mon let’s move away from here.” You ignore her. 

“What the fuck happened!?” She asks again and you shake your head, Taissa was right behind you guys, almost stumbling from what everyone had just witnessed.

“Misty did the right thing.” You say simply, sitting the two down.

“I’m going to help her out. Take a breather. Taissa stay with Van. She’s squeamish with this stuff.” You tell her and she nods up at you. Standing over her friend as you run off.

2021

“I never understood what happened between you and Taissa.” Shauna speaks up from the silence and you curtly hum. “Not much to understand.” You adjust yourself so you're resting against the door of the van. Fixing the seat belt so it’s not digging in your skin. “One of those things you refuse to talk about?” Shauna sighs. 

“I’m surprised you don’t know what it is.” You shrug. “She seemed to have a big mouth at the time.” You roll your eyes in irritation thinking back to yours and Taissa’s big blowout argument years ago.

“Must’ve said something horrible then.” Shauna pulls into your driveway and you see a familiar car parked beside yours. Making you squint slightly.

“That car wasn’t there before?” She points out and you look over at her then back at the car. “It’s my sister?” Unbuckling the belt but almost pre-cautiously. “Your sister? I thought she was down in Florida?”

“Yeah I thought so too.” You open the door. “See you later, call me in the morning.” You tell her and she nods her head. Observing the car ahead. “Will do, goodnight!” 

“Goodnight.” You shut the door and hurry to your front door, getting out your keys to unlock it.

Opening the door slowly, knowing that the car besides yours is definitely not your little sisters. “Natalie?” You call out, taking off your shoes and there she is. Sitting on your kitchen counter eating an apple. “The fuck?” You drop what's in your hands to rush over to her. She laughs, standing up.

“I was wondering why you weren’t home.” She exclaims as you pull her into a hug.

“Oh you know, Shauna and Taissa.” You roll your eyes, pushing off of her to look at her face.

“Taissa?” She raises her brows causing you to laugh. “Yeah, I wasn't told until we were at the diner.” You scoff, grabbing her apple and taking a bite of it. 

“They let you out of rehab?” You ask, leaning against your counter and she gives you a look. “No, I snuck out.” She sarcastically replies and you playfully push her. “You know what I meant.” 

“Yeah, I know. I got out earlier today. I still gotta do something tonight though. Think someone’s blackmailing me. Only person I can think of is that crazy ass bitch.” She takes back the apple from your hand, finishing it off. You tilt your head to the side. “Misty?” You raise a brow. 

“Who else?” She grabs her purse and begins to walk to your front door. You follow behind her. “Want me to come with?” You ask, kind of hopeful since the two of you rarely see each other anymore. “Nah, I got some things to do that I don’t want you involved in.” She shakes her head, your face drops without realizing and she gives you a sad smile back. 

“Trust me, when I’m done you and I need to spend some time with one another.” She grabs your hand to give it a small squeeze. “You’re my number one.” She reminds you and you smile. “If you need a place to stay, don’t hesitate to call me Nat.” You point a finger in her face. 

“You know I will.” She says before leaving you, shutting the door as you stand there. As quick as she was there she was gone. That’s usually how it goes with Natalie and you never minded it. 

Everyone coped differently after the crash. You don’t feel like going back to that headspace though. 

1996

“Hey, [Name]...” A voice quietly speaks from behind you, you turn around as you were helping Mari with her burn on her thigh. Using the sleeve of your sweat to hide your own. “Yes?” You peer up at her, crouched down. “Can you help with something?” She asks nervously, her fingers fidgeting with each other.

Her demeanor is different than before. She’s been giving out orders to everyone and with you, at this moment it seems like she can barely even say hi. “Give me a second, I’ll be right with you.” You nod your head firmly and she quietly thanks you before heading back over to Coach Ben. “You okay, Mari?” You stop pouring the water, closing it before putting it beside her. She shrugs her shoulders. You knew it was a redundant question but still. 

You knew everyone was scared, worried about what was going to happen to everyone. “I’m okay, it’s uncomfortable.” She answers, wincing when she moves her leg a little bit. “Understandable. Make sure it’s about to breathe, better than getting constantly covered. I’ll see if I can find my bag. I keep a little first aid kit.” You pat her good leg as you stand up. Heading over to Misty. 

“Like this. Got it?” Misty looks up at the two girls behind her after she had just torn a long strip from a t-shirt. Taissa and Natalie nod, and the little blonde hands the shirt over to Tai. “As many as you can. And fast. We’re gonna need to change the bandages soon. And then hourly after that.” She directs. “If he even lives that long.” Natalie comments and you come over, slightly nudging her with a shake of your head.

“Don’t say that.” Misty sharply replies, both you and Natalie blink at her. The poor girl has taken control, barking orders to everyone to keep them busy as she’s still in shock. Everyone else is but they’re all different. 

“Just… keep ripping those up, okay?” She moves on, standing up and smacking her hands together to get the dirt off.

“Alright, [Name]. Can you come with me?” She motions and you hum, stepping behind her. 

“Do you think you can get a few others to gather wood for a fire?” She crosses her arms and you give a confused expression. “I- I mean I know I can, but I just… I want help. Giving orders.” She explains slowly and you glance around at the other girls as you think.

“I’m worried about Coach Ben and I would just appreciate not having to focus on telling everyone what to do.” She says. 

“I got you Misty, don’t worry. I’ll get some of the girls to gather wood and I’m going to get others to help me look around the plane for our things.” You tell her, hands on your hips as you let out a breath.

“Thank you.” Her deep brown eyes look deeply in yours and you stick a hand out. “We’re a team.” You remind her and she gapes down at your hand before beaming. Taking your hand roughly.

“Right.” 

“Alright,” You clap your hands as you stand in the middle of where everyone is. “We need to get moving. It looks like we’re going to be here for the night so we need to build a fire.” You loudly explain for everyone to hear. 

“Akilah, Mari, Van and Melissa. Can you go look for sticks? Branches. Anything for the fire. Make sure they’re dry, not too new. Wet wood is difficult to catch fire.” You point to the four, they get up from their spots. Mari limping a little. “Yeah.” “got it.” The four agree, heading off to do as told. 

“Okay anyone who can walk or feels comfortable enough we need to search around for our bags. Get them all together. I see a few already did but somebody might have something to help.” You tell them, already making your way toward the plane that was just on fire. A hand reaches out for your wrist. Stopping you. 

“Are you sure you can go in there?” It was Jackie and you furrow your brows. “Yeah, if no one else will, someone has to.” You say simply, pulling your arm to your side. “I mean, I’ll come with.” She grabs onto your arm once again, walking in the plane with you that’s still warm by the fire that was once there. Some things are still slightly caught on fire or extremely hot. 

You walk to the back of the plane where Van was sitting, where the both of you had almost died together not even hours ago. You try to see if there’s anything of hers you can scavenge. You know her bag was near Taissa’s but her backpack is what you’re searching for. 

“Hey, when I… left Van earlier and stuff. It wasn’t personal or like-” “I know.” You cut her off as she was picking up her and Shauna’s bags. “I was scared, I didn’t know what to do…”

“I understand, Jackie.” You tell her earnestly as you find Van’s bag extremely burnt. “I thought you both died.” She mutters but it was loud enough for you to hear. “Well, we’re alive.” You smile over at her and she rolls her eyes. 

“Taissa thought you guys were dead too, she screamed for you guys. Did you not hear her?” She asks, moving to another area to pick up a few more backpacks. 

“No, I can’t speak for Van but I know I couldn’t focus on anything other than getting away from the flames. All I heard was Van crying, really.” You try to think back but the only thing that echoed in your head were her sobs. The crackling of the fire. The smell of plastic burning. Your arm. 

“Oh…” Was all Jackie could muster out. The guilt got to her, In the same breath she went back and forth. She was protecting her best friend. Protecting her from becoming a dead body. Even if it meant leaving another person behind. 

You moved around, picking up bags. Luckily even finding your own. “C’mon, I’m sure others found our suitcases. We can come back for more later.” You pat your friend's side as you walk past her. 

“Right behind you.” Jackie murmurs, the two of you coming out and placing the bags down. You open your bag and grab the first aid kit you knew you had. “Mari, I have some burn cream!” You call out as she was walking with a bunch of sticks in her arms. “Sick!” She grins, dropping the wood in a pile. Sprinting over to you. 

“I’ll put it on you. Don’t want to use too much…” You crouch down, eye level with her burn on her thigh. “Thank you, this is a life saver.” She says and you wave as if it’s nothing. You open the tube but then look down at your dirty fingers. “Hold on.” You stand back up, grabbing a water bottle and rinsing off your pointer finger.

The others watch as you go back to the brunette, their eyes fixated on you specifically.

“Hopefully it heals fast.” You comment as you put the cream on your finger, crouching back down and then gently smooth it over the burn. 

Mari winces, almost letting out a small groan at the feeling. “I’m sorry.” You scrunch your nose, putting a little more on the burn before looking up at her. “All done.” You rub your finger on your jeans, putting the tub in your pocket. Noting to remember to put it on your own arm later. 

“Bleeding’s slowing down. But we need to disinfect it somehow. Maybe something from the bar cart?” Misty speaks. “There wasn’t one. I mean, it was just soda. It cost less that way.” Lottie sheepishly says. “Seriously?” Taissa scoffs.

“Rich people are fucking cheap.” The girl responds in defense. “Maybe somebody brought some contraband…” Laura Lee mentions and everyone, even you turns to Natalie who had just walked up with Taissa with fresh bandages for Coach. “Um, okay. Wow.” Natalie huffs and you try not to smile. “Well, did you?” Misty quizzes. 

“Yeah, obviously. But I stashed it in my bag, and [Name] didn’t find it somehow.” She frowns. “You guys. What about this?” Van says from behind, picking up a bottle of Seabreeze Toner.

“Hey. That’s-” Jackie catches herself, pressing her lips together. “A good idea, Van.” 

You watch Van give her a dark look, handing the bottle to the captain of the soccer team. Jackie looks over at you as she cringes and you give an apologetic look before following after the redhead. 

“Hey, where you going?” You question as you catch up to the girl who sighs loudly. “Sorry, I’m just feeling a type of way towards Jackie…” She grumbles, plopping down on the ground in front of all the bags. You stand over her. “I mean, you have every right to feel that way. But she was scared.” You’re not necessarily defending Jackie’s actions but you do see why she did what she did. 

“I was scared! I was terrified.” Van snaps, refusing to look up at you and you place a hand on her shoulder. “It was scary Van, you could have died. Everything you feel- the anger, all of it. Is valid. I promise.” You sit down with her. “Why don’t you feel any anger? Aren’t you scared? You seem so… weirdly calm?” She questions, finally glancing at you. 

You suck in a breath. “I am scared.” You say. “Terrified.”  You stare off at the plane that sat there. When you guys should be in Seattle. When you should be getting off that plane and going to a hotel. Is anyone looking for you guys? Is the airport tracking you guys down? 

How long will you guys be in these woods for? 

2021

You lay in bed wearing a red lace lingerie set. Your eyebrows furrowed as you stare at yourself in the mirror. Checking yourself out. You take your phone from the bed to take pictures of yourself, trying to pose in good angles. Normally you’d never do this- wear fancy lingerie. Well maybe years ago. But now?

Never. 

You practically swore to celibacy after being single for so long. The occasional hookups but you never felt it was worth it to dress up for someone you were only using for your own gratification. But here you are. Buying and wearing underwear for a hookup you’re supposed to see tonight. 

You finally take a picture you like, staring at your screen with a smile. But as you stare at it longer you begin to see how prominent your scars appear in the photo. Your eyes bouncing from each scar. From the one that goes down your thigh. The rather large burn scar that’s on your left arm. And then the one that goes from the middle of your stomach to your side. Looking deep and ugly. 

“Shit…” You sit down on your bed. She’ll see it anyway in person, you tell yourself. What does it matter that it’s in the picture? You subconsciously find yourself rubbing your thigh. Feeling the bumps of the scar. 

You huff, going to your texts and just sending the picture with a small message about how excited you were for the night since she should be on her way to your house in thirty minutes. In reality this felt like nothing new. Nothing special. Just sex with a rando. 

There were a few times with your hookups that it would happen a few more times. Nothing more than two weeks. If you sensed them getting too attached you cut it off. It’s not that it was them. You were sure if you were more emotionally mature you’d feel the same but instead you cut that from your life. The option of having a life filled with love. You gave up on that a while ago. 

Your phone dings, pushing your negative thoughts away. 

It was your hookup, Kania. Flirting with the normal disgusting dirty talk you have before sex. You grab your robe, throwing it on and heading to your living room to turn on the music. Along with setting the candles up. Wine on the coffee table. 

As you’re getting everything ready you place your phone on the coffee table face down. Trying to make sure you have everything for the night. A knock sounds at your door and you go to answer it. Fixing your hair along with making sure the robe is tightly on. No chance of falling open… just yet. 

Opening the door with a smile. The girl stands before you, just as superficially pretty as she is on her dating page. “C’mon in.” You move out of the way allowing her in. “Nice place, very cosy.” She looks around and you nod, quietly thanking her. “Is that Roxette?’ The girl suddenly questions and you gasp with wide eyes. 

“You’re into her?” You were hopeful but then when you look at her face she seems to be quite the opposite with Roxette. “Mm, I mean my mom was super into her… You have anything newer?” She tilts her head and your shoulders drop. Way to make you feel old. 

“Yeah, I have like… Arctic Monkeys?” You look through your cd’s. Shauna’s daughter Callie would come over with her sometimes and gifted you the cd’s telling you that you have to keep up with the music times. 

“Oh they’re good, put them on.” The girl plops down on your couch while observing your home. You press your lips together in annoyance as you change out the cd. And as the girl behind you is looking around her eyes stop at the pictures on your wall. Pictures of you and a redhead. You guys kissing, pictures on the beach together. Out on dates. 

“Uh, so… how long have you been doing these hookups?” 

You turn to her with a confused expression. Chatting before sex? Not unusual but not your favorite start. “Couple years, I don’t do relationships.” You say, stepping over to her, you follow her eyes over to your wall and you let out a deep sigh. “She’s dead. I promise I’m not in a relationship.” You place a hand over your heart and the girl’s mouth goes into an ‘o’ shape. “Yeah…” You were lying but she doesn’t have to know the real reason why you keep photos up of your ex girlfriend. “Oh… I’m sorry.” 

“Don’t be, c’mon stop with the chit chat. That’s not why you came over here, is it?” You smirk, picking up a glass of wine and offering it over to her. She nods her head, taking the glass which gives you some sort of relief. You had no interest in some stranger digging in your past. “Right.” You pick up your own glass, taking a rather large drink of it. 

Setting it back down as she sips on it, seemingly nervous. You untie your robe. No exchanging words, you were antsy and ready. You didn’t want to wait any more. Kania almost chokes on her dry drink, placing it down immediately at the sight of your chest and the way it’s encased with the red lace. 

You snicker at her reaction, pulling her into a kiss. Holding her face with both your hands as you deepen it. 

Your mouths moving together in sync, you hear her little moans underneath you as you get onto your knees on the cushion. Not even unlocking from her. Kania’s hands finding your waist and pulling you into her lap. 

Making you straddle her. 

Grinding your hips down to get some sort of friction. Getting excited as this was leading to what you’ve been needing. 

And as it was getting to the good part you hear your phone buzz on the glass. The sound wasn’t on luckily so you decided to ignore it. Continuing to make out with the pretty woman. 

But as it doesn’t stop for the next two minutes, Kania decides to pull away from the kiss. “You should probably get that.” She chuckles and you groan, throwing your head back. “Yeah… probably.” You stand up, snatching the phone up and answering the phone without looking at who it is. 

“Hello?” You crossed your arms, feeling your own skin underneath the laced bra, holding yourself with the one arm. “[Name], it’s Misty. Can you meet us at the bar near my house?” She spoke and you furrowed your brows. “Misty? How the fuck did you get my number?” 

“I’m with Natalie, say hi Nat.” You hear the phone get passed and you hear a small “heyy” from your best friend. Your face drops. “Why the fuck am I meeting you?” You put your weight onto one leg as you ask. “It’s important, I promise. Just meet us. Do you remember where my house is?” 

“I know what bar it is. The Dive Bar. I’ll be on my way just give me a second.” You sigh, hanging up the phone without saying goodbye. You look at Kania. “I have to go. Sorry to cut this short.” You head to your bedroom. Roughly taking off the robe. “Want me to wait here until you get back?” She asks, following after you. 

Watching as you throw on a pair of jeans and a sweater. “No, I’m sorry but just go home. I’ll call you whenever I’m free.” You tell her shortly. Going back to the livingroom to blow out all the candles. “Um… alright. I’ll make sure my ringer is on then.” She jokes and you give a polite smile as you grab your keys and wallet. 

“Bye, Kania.” You open the door for her. “See ya.” She exits and you let out a breath. Wanting to punch something. The one night you want to fuck someone. The one night within months. 

Entering the bar you’re automatically embraced by the blonde girl. “[Name]! It’s been a while.” She exclaims and you give her a tight-lipped smile. “Yup.” You let her drag you to the bar counter. “Oh you got us drinks!” Misty happily points out to Natalie, sitting down beside her as you sit on the other side. Natalie pushes one cup toward you then picks up the whiskey and slugs it. Chasing it with the beer. 

“I can’t believe I’ve never been in here before. It’s so… edgy!” Misty quickly moves on and you take the whiskey you were given like a shot. Downing it quickly. “So why am I here?” You fold your arms, smacking the glass down on the counter. “Someone’s messing with us.” Natalie says, showing the card that has the symbol on it. 

Your heart drops seeing it.

“Did you not get one?” Misty asks and you shake your head. “No.” 

“What have you got?” Natalie eyes a manilla file folder in Misty’s tote bag. The blonde pulls out her file, setting it on the bar with a proud manner. “Well. If I’ve learned one thing in the citizen detective community…” 

“The… what?” Natalie glances over to you who shrugs with a small amused look. Motioning to the bartender to get you another whiskey. He nods his head, grabbing your glass to replace it. 

“Citizen Detective. We’re like private investigators, except nobody hired us or asked for our help. We work together online to solve cold cases. You know, disappearances, murders. It’s super fun.” She explains and you lick your lips. Hoping this night won’t be too much longer. 

The bartender gives you your drink and you thank him. This time not downing it like the one before. “Anywho! There are really only two questions that matter in any case: who and why. If you get one, you can usually figure out the other. So I’ve been asking myself, "What does the person who sent those cards want?” 

“To scare us? To mess with our heads? To remind us of-” She pauses before speaking in a lower voice. “What happened out there? It’s obviously a threat.” Natalie reaches out, taking Misty’s file folder. 

You get up, going over to Nat’s side to also look at what’s in the folder. Various articles and magazine covers of the Yellowjackets about your disappearance, the rescue and then random press. Shauna and Jeff's local wedding announcement. Callie’s birth certificate. Taissa’s campaign flyer for state senate. A brochure for Natalie’s rehab clinic, a business card for [Name]’s job. Then another business card. For Jessica Roberts. 

“Who’s Jessica Roberts?” Natalie asks and you scoff out a laugh. “That bitch.” You murmur. 

“That depends on who you ask. She claims to be a reporter, but as far as I can tell that’s a lie. She’s been sniffing around. Claims to be peddling a book deal. But-”

“How could she know about… you know…” Natalie cuts her off and you also look to the blonde for answers. “Maybe someone talked.” Misty shrugs. 

Natalie picks up Taissa’s campaign flyer. “You didn’t start collecting this stuff a week ago. You’ve been keeping tabs on us. Why?” With this question Misty blushes, looking at the both of you with a sudden vulnerability. “You guys are the most important people in my life.” 

It's a weird sentiment, one that you can’t help but stare at her for admitting. Natalie then spots something else in the file. Seeing a photocopy of a man’s new hampshire drivers license. You then turn to see her face grow pale. “You found Travis?” She asks and you let out a small gasp at the sight of the man. 

“Oh, yeah. Talk about somebody who didn’t want to be found.” Misty widens her eyes, grabbing your whiskey and taking a sip of it without asking. You rub your best friends back, not knowing what else to do. 

“Here you go, ladies.” The bartender sets three glasses down on the table. “From the gentleman in the back. Three shots of and I quote, “the cheapest shit you got.” Says it’s your drink of choice.” He makes eye contact with Natalie who could care less. But Misty and you look over with delight to see a man approaching the three of you. 

He doesn’t take his eyes off Natalie, you awkwardly stand there. Knowing exactly who he is. Finally Natalie looks up after you nudge her a couple of times. 

“Hi.” Kevyn speaks. “Hi,” Natalie repeats. 

“Wow. It really is you…” He breathes out. “Hi!” Misty beams and he turns, just realizing that she’s there. “Hey, I’m-” 

“Kevyn. It’s Misty. Misty Quigley from third period Spanish.”

“Misty, right. Of course.” He cut her sentence short, obviously only wanting to speak with Natalie. He gives you a small wave and you let out a laugh. “Man, Natalie Scatorccio. I really wish I had a killer line right now. In fairness, I’ve only had, you know, twenty years to come up with one…” He babbles on. 

“It’s good to see you.” Natalie says. “Yeah, yeah, you too.” He then looks between the three of you. “Sorry, is this a bad time? I feel like you’re in the middle of something…” 

She gives him a tight smile. “Right. Got it. Well… I don’t know how long you’re in town for. But just in case, I’m gonna leave this. Somehow I don’t think you’re gonna use it, but if you maybe wanna maybe get a drink another twenty years from now, you’ll know how to reach me.” He takes out a business card from his wallet. And you observe the emotions that stew off from his face, the embarrassment and longing for Natalie. Setting the card down without saying anything else. Not even looking back. 

“Holy shit.” You laugh and Natalie hits your stomach. “Dang. If somebody had told me goth freak Kevyn Tan would grow up like that…” She trails off. “Didn’t you three used to be friends?” 

“Yeah.” The two of you say.

Natalie slams down her shot then turns her attention back to the license. Supposedly a John Garcia. “Are you sure this is him? Travis?”

“I don’t know if it’s a good idea, Nat…” You say and she shushes you as Misty nods. “Is this a cell or a landline?” 

She shrugs, not knowing. Natalie folds the sheet of paper. “Natalie, please. Don’t do something stupid.” You tell her as she stands up but completely ignores your words as she walks out. 

You peer over to Misty who pockets Kevyn’s business card, slipping it into her purse. You down your shot along with the rest of the whiskey. “I came here for her to leave.” You glare at the counter. “I left my hookup. For this.” You mutter. Misty looks over at you with curious eyes. “You had a hookup?”

1996

You had sent Lottie, Van and Lauri Lee to go see if they can find bags or anything else in the woods. Not far but see what fell from the plane during the crash. Giving them something to do. 

“Javi! Stop!” You hear Taissa shout as you are sitting with Nat and Akilah. You look where everyone else was to see Javi attempting to go into the opening of the plane. Towards the still smoking fuselage. Javi turns back, startled, almost losing his balance but resumes on what he’s doing. 

“Dad! DAD!” He screams and you shoot up, heading to the kid as Taissa tells Natalie to go find Travis. 

“Javi, that’s not safe bud. Please get out of there.” You follow after him, Taissa right behind you. “I have to find him.” He musters out, not even giving you the time of day. “I know, I know but he’s not in here. I promise.” You place a hand on his shoulder. “Well where would he be?” His voice cracks, breaking your heart. 

You frown, wishing you could give him the answers. “I don’t know, bud.” You mumble, Taissa stays silent, her eyes on the ground. “Why is nobody else worried about him?” Tears fall from his face and you glance back to Tai who seems panicked. Not knowing how to help. “We are, there’s a lot happening Javi.” You breathe out. 

“Here, let’s get out of this hot ass plane. I will go help you look for him. But once it starts getting dark- we have to come back here.” You grab his hand telling him and he looks up at you, hope filling his eyes. “Okay.” He nods. 

“Okay.” You smile, pulling him into a hug, he clings onto you tightly. 

“Let’s go bud, this smoke is starting to give me ptsd.” You nudge him and he lets out a small noise you assumed was supposed to be a laugh. Taissa snickers, letting the kid get out first then slinging her arm around your shoulder. “If you need me, or anyone else, just call my name.” You tell her, keeping up with the boy who was waiting patiently for you to hurry up. “Okay, will do.” 

You jog up to the boy and motion for him to lead the way. 

It was quiet between the two of you, every now and then the both of you will shout for Coach Martinez. You had a very grave feeling about what happened to him. You didn’t think you were going to find him alive but you kept searching with Javi. Not wanting to put that thought into his head. 

Unfortunately you guys haven’t even been out more than an hour when a blood curdling scream emits and your heart sinks. “Javi-” You grab onto him, the both of you running in the direction of the scream. 

“You see the girls begin to gather around one tree. “What happened!?” You yell, still holding onto Javi who is gripping onto your arm. “[Name]-” Shauna comes to your side when you finally look up to see Coach Martinez on a branch. You gasp, smacking a hand over your mouth. Javi distraught, slowly lets go of your arm but you pull him into your arms. Shauna on the other side of him. “Dad… Daddy.” He cries as your mouth hangs open in shock of the sight. 

“Holy macaroni, is that?” Misty and Natalie show up together. “He’s got to be dead, right?” Nat looks to the group, her face obviously filled with the same feeling as everyone else. Shauna throws her a what the fuck look, nodding to Javi and you. 

“Alright. Who has the best arm?” Jackie asks. “What?” Lottie steps in. 

“We could, you know, throw something at him and see if he moves.” She explains herself. “You want to throw rocks at Coach, who fell out of a plane?” Taissa repeats what she’s comprehending. You grimace at the idea. “I didn’t say rocks. Someone’s shoe, or whatever.” Jackie defends. 

“Oh, well, that’s a fuck-ton smarter. You’re on fire today, Jackie- no, wait, that was supposed to be me and [Name].” Van deadpans at the girl who holds herself. You sigh, rubbing Javi’s back up and down. “What?” Taissa looks between you, Van, and Jackie confused on what the redhead is talking about. 

“Guys, stop. We need a plan here.” Shauna jumps in, leaving you alone with Javi as she joins the group. “We could lower him with ropes?” Laura Lee offers. Everyone stares at her. As if saying “What ropes?” 

“Vines, then.” She continues. “For fuck-sake, Laura Lee, we’re not going to Tarzan him out of a tree.” Natalie snaps. “You got a better idea?” Jackie rebuttals. “Than shoes and vines? Sure. Let’s just cut the fucking thing down.” Natalie shrugs. You look down at Javi who should not be hearing this. 

It reminds you of your little siblings. He’s older but his vulnerability, his childness is similar. He’s so young and he was just in a plane crash and his dad is dead on a tree. God, you wonder how your siblings are right now. 

You wonder if your mom will tell them how your plane is missing or has crashed. How will she do so…?

How would they react? They’re so dependent on you. 

“Dad.” A voice speaks from behind everyone and you look to see Travis. He’s out of his fugue state. Screaming out for his dad. Bolting for the tree and beginning to climb. It’s almost inhuman how fast he’s shimmying up the trunk. The girls yell after him but it falls on deaf ears. 

He’s advancing toward the dense branches where his dad is. His body bent in a grotesque way. The boy creeps closer to him, onto thinner branches. He looks down and unfortunately the wood begins to quiver under his added weight. Javi calls out for Travis but still holding onto you. Hiding his face in your body every now and then. 

Misty gets the other girls to do their best tying blankets together to create a tarp to catch Coach or Travis. 

Travis inches closer but from down below all the girls heard was the branch starting to break. “Travis get back!” “Get back!” They yell after him, hurriedly he does so and not even seconds of him getting to safety the branch breaks. Thudding with the ground. 

You force Javi to look away by hugging him closer to you. He lets out a whimper. You also grab onto Van who was closest to you. You hadn’t even noticed her walk to you. She hides her face on your shoulder. “Shit.” She mutters. 

Everyone is silent, no one making a peep. Frozen in place, holding onto one another as they got their answer that their Coach is dead. The only adult they have is Coach Ben and he’s knocked out, missing a leg. 

You walk backwards with Javi still in your arms. Holding onto him and getting him away from this scene. Van was tripping after you, trying to peer her eyes away from the fallen branch that took Martinez with it. 

Javi’s body wracked with sobs and you try to comfort him the best you can. Letting him cling onto you, cry on your shoulder as you sit with him. Van stayed with you for you. Watching your facial expressions with the young boy. Your maternal instincts that went into action automatically without a second thought. 

Later in the day a few of the girls sat with you when they felt worked out. Asking you questions and you answering swiftly. They found comfort in you. The younger ones at least. The seniors see you as a friend. An equal but watching how you are with the freshman. With Javi, it’s making them a little envious. 

Javi falls asleep beside your body and you stare down at him sadly. His hair messily in his face. If he was your little brother- or sister, you would have moved it out of the way.

They begged you to play with their hair before they went to bed. Every night. Now it’s just mainly your sister who does so. Theo says he’s too old for that. 

The younger girls were also laying around you, falling asleep or talking amongst one another. You look to Van who’s still beside you. Picking at her nails. “He’s sleeping.” You whisper. 

“Want me to watch him for a bit?” She asks and the corner of your lips twitch upward. “I’d appreciate it. I’m just going to get my stuff. I think I’m going to stay near him.” You stand up from your spot, stretching out your body. Hearing all the pops and cracks. Accidentally rubbing your left arm against your side. Your nostrils flare a bit at the pain. 

You were also going to care for that burn you forgot about. You’ve been so distracted you didn’t even remember to put the cream on it. You also note to put more on Mari’s thigh. 

“Can you grab mine as well? I found my suitcase before… Coach.” She stammers and you nod your head. “You sure? You don’t have to stay, I’d understand wanting to be around your closer friends.” You motion to the other seniors. She shakes her head. “I’d say we’re closer than all those fuckers. Almost dying a second time together.” She reminds you and you snicker. “True.”

You make it to where everyone is, a little breathless. “Javi fell asleep. Van’s got her eye on him.” You announce. “Where’s Travis?” Natalie asks and you shrug. “I haven’t seen him. Want me to help you look?” You offer as you pick up your things along with Vans and her eyes fall to what you’re grabbing. Noticing it. 

She smiles a little bit without trying to make it obvious. “Nah, I got it.” 

“It’s going to be dark soon. Shouldn’t we maybe… make  a fire?” Akilah speaks up and Natalie lifts up a lighter, flicking it.

“We have the wood [Name] had us gather.” Mari comes up and you smile. “Let’s make a spot!” You clap your hands. 

“I do not want to touch any dead bodies, but we have to get them out of the plane so we have somewhere to sleep.” Jackie suddenly says as she shivers. “Fuck. I almost forgot- I mean, I still can’t believe they’re all…” She doesn’t say the word. Everyone takes in their grief. The enormity of what happened. 

“We can’t sleep in there. It’ll be way colder.” Misty looks at the charred husk of the fuselage. “Yeah, like that makes sense…” Jackie scoffs. “Misty’s right. It’s the law of thermodynamics.” Mari stands up for the blonde. 

“How about the Law of Getting Eaten by bears? Ever heard of that one?” Jackie sarcastically comments and you laugh. “The crash was pretty loud. I doubt there will be bears or any animal near here for a while.” You assure her and she glances at you for a second.

“If we take turns keeping the fire going, we should be alright.” Taissa chimes in offering another idea on the table. 

You notice Misty looking between Taissa and Mari, thankful. You also see Jackie throwing Shauna a look, feeling ganged up on. “It’s just for a night.” Shauna makes a face. “Whatever. You guys do what you fucking want.” Jackie storms off and you roll your eyes. 

Heading back to Van and placing the stuff down. “We’re going to be getting a fire started.” You inform her, she hums. Looking up at you. “I’m going to let him rest for a bit but then have him move once we have everything done.” You reach a hand out for her to take. 

“Mm, good idea. He’s out like a light.” She says, taking your hand and standing up. “I know I’ve been bringing it up a bit. But thank you for helping me. Staying with me when you could’ve ran with Jackie and Shauna.” She squeezes your hand and you wave it off. “I promised you I wasn’t going to leave you. Can’t break a promise.” You smile. 

The girls gather the dead bodies, putting them in an area and covering them with a banner for the Yellowjackets. You heard the sobs from your spot as you sat with Javi at the fire. Along with Jackie who sat a little bit away from you. You had set up a spot for all the girls. Even tried to do so for Travis but he insisted on being away from everyone even if it meant he was going to be cold. 

You have been aiding people with their injuries with your first aid kit. Even if it was small you were still checking in on anyone and everyone. You kept the kit right next to you.

Slowly the girls were coming back to the fire the later it got. Van plopped right next to you on your left side since Javi was on the right. She nudges you, accidentally hitting your burn. 

You let out a small yelp but immediately cover it up with a weird noise then a cough. The redhead gives you a look but you try to avoid her gaze, turning your head to see some snacks you found.

“Hey, you want these?” You murmur and she looks at the bag of corn nuts. 

“I mean, if you want to share. Sure.” She nods. It was relieving that she didn’t question you further. 

“I’m sure the plane has an emergency transmitter sending out a distress signal. They’ll be here to rescue us by morning.” Shauna attempts to give hope to everyone. 

“Still, maybe we should conserve some food. In case they don’t come until later in the day.” Jackie comments, looking at you and Van eating from the little bag. 

“So you wanna save the corn nuts?” She glares, defiantly popping another bite into her mouth and you stop chewing on the one you had. Feeling a bit awkward. Jackie looks at you, hopeful you’d understand what she meant.

“A singular bag isn’t hurting anyone. I don’t think you meant badly by what you said Jackie but let’s hope they find us in the morning.” You give her a sympathetic smile and she attempts to do it back but instead just frowns. 

Javi is back to leaning against you, staring at the fire as you had your arm wrapped around him. Your hand rubbing up and down his bicep. It was a quiet agreement between the both of you. You were now his comfort person. You were now the person he was going to run to when he’s upset or scared. 

And you didn’t mind it. 

“You okay, Laura Lee?” Taissa speaks up, earning the attention from everyone. “This is all my fault. I did something really bad.” Her eyes shine with guilt and sadness. “I kept screwing up at my piano lesson last week. And Mrs. Brophy kept yelling at me. Sharp. No, F sharp. F sharp!” She mimics her piano teacher. “She kept saying I needed to practice more, but I did practice. I swear. And I just… I called her a bad word. Just in my head, but God heard me. And how we’re being punished!” She breathes out,

Everyone exchanges a look. “What did you call her?” Taissa asks. 

“Cunt.” Laura Lee shamefully whispers. 

And the absurdity of it all makes everyone erupt into laughter. Even Javi. The release of Laura Lee’s shameful action leads to others. “I steal shitty clothes from the TJ Maxx near my house.” Lottie blurts out and this time eyes were on her. “Then I return them and get store credit I never use. I have thousands of dollars in TJ bucks.” She admits and more laughter carries on. 

“I used to sneak down after everybody had gone to bed and watch the Color Of Night so I could pause it on Bruce Willis’s wang. I mean, Jeff’s not bad, but damn.” Jackie says to the group. “That is definitely why we crashed.” Taissa jokes. And since everyone is having too much twisted fun, no one saw Misty heat an axe in the fire before walking away. 

“I started that rumor about Becky Colgate getting her dog to eat her out with peanut butter ‘cause she got a better grade than me in Trig.” Mari says and you gasp while also laughing with everyone else. 

“What about you, Shipman? Any secrets big enough to crash a goddamn plane?” The attention goes to the brown-eyed girl. “Remember when Randy took us to that party in Holmdel?” 

“Where that trashy girl was a bitch to you about drinking her Zima?” Jackie raises a brow. 

“Yeah… I found her bedroom later and peed on her pillow.” She tells and everyone loves it, laughing in delight but it’s quickly cut short but an agonized scream.

Everyone shoots up, running over as Coach Scott passes out from the pain. Misty had cauterized his leg. “It was the only way to stop the bleeding for good.” Misty says, remorseless.

2021

“Can you please just come with me?” Natalie breathes, carrying a duffel bag and you cross your arms in front of her. “I mean I’m here aren’t I?” You roll your eyes and she smiles.

“Like back in the day.” She comments and you scoff. “Yeah, ride or die but this is… something.” You bite your tongue from what you really want to say. 

“You left me at the bar with Misty last night.” You add and she laughs. “I had a hookup before going to that bar, you know. And I cut it short for your ass. And you left me!” You complain and she just ignores you, walking to her Porsche with you behind her.

You had driven over because she offered you coffee. So far no coffee and you don’t even think there’s a plan to get any. Another disappointment you had to live with. 

She throws her bag into the trunk as you get into the passenger seat of the car. Natalie hops in, sticking the key in and turning it. Nothing happens. You give your best friend a look as she tries it again but it still won’t start. 

A car honks beside you and the both of you look up to see Misty pulling up in her periwinkle blue Fiat. 

“Everything, okay?” It was muffled since Natalie’s window was up. Natalie looks over at you, both of you sharing a look before she rolls the window down. “I was getting coffee and saw you both.” Holding up a cup of coffee and pointing over her shoulder to the coffee place next to the motel. You look at it with raging jealousy. 

“Engine trouble?” Misty asks. 

“Looks like it.” Natalie answers. “You going someplace? I’m actually off today. Tomorrow, too. Just saying.” She gives unwarranted information. “Where you two going?” 

“We were actually thinking of taking a little trip up north.” Natalie tells. “To see Travis? Aw, but your car! Well, I had some errands to run, but I can take you if you want. We can make it a road trip!” She offers. “I actually have my car we could use…” You say and the two look over at your beat up car that’s over 20 years old. A car you refuse to get rid of due to how attached you were. “Juno runs pretty good for her age.”

Natalie looks back to Misty. “We’ll take your car, but I’m driving.” She points and you huff in annoyance. 

You get out of the Porsche and Natalie grabs her duffel bag as you climb into the Fiat’s back seat. Natalie and Misty walk by each other so Natalie can drive. Misty pulls out two more coffees and offers it to the both of you after getting into the car. 

“Why’d you buy three?” Natalie questions. 

“Oh, I usually always buy things in twos. So that way I always have enough to share but today just felt like I should buy three. And man, my feeling was right!” She beams, you could care less about her dumb excuse, taking the coffee that you’ve been desperate all morning for. 

Natalie starts the engine and pulls out, Misty continues to talk about things she buys two of.

Taglist: if you want to be added lmk!