#sunanchr

there’s an expected sense of quiet in the air that comes hand in hand with the early morning, muffled conversations in the glamping tents and the waves against the shore being the only audible noises in the dark. yet there’s a certain irony in the way that the clock on his phone reads 04:02AM in bright, white numbers, as though it’s reminding him that he should be asleep right now, but hansol thinks this is the most awake he’s ever felt for a long time.

from here on the shore, he can barely tell the difference between where the sky ends and where the sea begins, had it not been for the faint glow of the moon luminating the ill-defined ripples of the water, a picturesque photo definition of the word serenity. it’s too pretty a sight to share alone, especially on a night where hansol wants to be anything other than lonely, and it doesn’t take long for him to decide what he wants to do.

he drops the cigarette and digs it into the ground with the heel of his foot as he makes his way back inside the tent, pushing the hood of his jacket down. it’s easy to spot him. hansol thinks it’s obvious how he stands out even against a crowd of people, let alone a tent full of barely fifteen people. sunan’s back is turned to him, and he takes advantage of it to slip behind the other easily, voice low and quiet.

“gotcha.” he murmurs against the other’s ear, in case there are any curious people listening in, grinning as his fingers clasp around sunan’s wrist and turns him around. the cold metal of the other’s cartier bracelet leaves goosebumps against his skin, but hansol doesn’t let go. 

the first light of the sun’s rays are peering through the curtains -- that, combined with the unfamiliarity of the bed he’s laying on, the sound of footsteps and hushed whispers through the walls, and a glance at his apple watch tells hamin that he’s had a total of maybe thirty minutes of sleep throughout the night. insomnia, a wonderful thing. heaving a sigh, he ends up readying himself in an oversized hoodie and shorts to leave the cottage ( he picked a secluded one, because no damn way was he staying anywhere close to his siblings ) and roam the beach before the sun was fully up to roast them all.

on his search for the perfect spot, hamin spots an all too familiar figure-- and just seeing him fills his chest with an unrecognizable warmth, and a sense of peace, calming the anxious waves that had been storming his brain as the week passes. it peaked last night, especially, and now it calms and ebbs away slowly, waning. “sunan,” he calls quietly, voice hoarse, lower than usual and heavy with sleep. he quickens his stride, matching his pace up with his friend’s so they fall into step. and hamin knew that sunan was there on the island, of course, from their texts. somehow, however, as the universe would have it, there was no time for them to be until now, just one day before the official party.

hamin actually has no idea how he appears ( what with the wild party that had blown him back to the cottage at ungodly hours )-- with his mussed hair, his unusually plain clothes, and none of his usual array of accessories in sight except his studs and the thin silver chain he wore at all times. he’s quite sure his eyebags were common at this point. but, he didn’t have to worry about any of that with sunan. he could be comfortable.

yul immediately brightens at this question. it’s an easy one.

“taking shia to the zoo. it’s a great way to spend time with her and she’s always most happy going to the zoo to visit @chrhaneul while learning new things about fish.” he chuckles while thinking about how shia will always bring her new sticker packs to show off to haneul.

“of course, it does make me concerned that she might ask for an aquarium like the one at the zoo… but i guess that’s something for another day,” yul shrugs lightheartedly.

the person in front of him seems oddly familiar.

you’ll like him, sunan had said earlier that evening, catching his eyes in the mirror as his mouth curled into a skittish smile, he reminds me of you.

familiar is an understatement. it’s an itch at the back of his mind, like if hansol really tried he could put a name to a face, an unopened pandora’s  box that he’s buried in his memories either accidentally or not. but it’s quarter past midnight and he lacks both the patience and brainpower to ruminate over it, instead murmuring to sunan as if the aforementioned third party isn’t in front of them. “that’s him?”

he doesn’t spare a second before abruptly leaning forwards, hand reaching out to tuck the new boy’s chin between his index finger and thumb. his other hand taps his cigarette against the counter top, flicking the ashes off before returning the stick to between his lips.

his eyes flitter over his face like he’s scrutinising him, the slope of his nose, arch of his cheekbones, curve of his mouth. finally, hansol smiles, letting go of his chin with an unnecessary measure of pizzazz, fingers lingering on the other’s cheek for a heartbeat longer than it was called for. the music blares behind them, heavy bass and vibrations under their feet syncing up to his irregular heartbeat. it all sounds like white noise to him.

"rejection." mimi's response was abrupt, prolonged only by the smile that followed. the single word was already more than she'd like to share, and any further explanation of the fear would require her coming to terms with the underlying truth that she was afraid of how her father would react to her existence being revealed after 23 years.

"My greatest mistake was letting a few people smell a whiff of fear from me." It's definitely hard to believe, but the intimidating and calculative Changmin was once the victim, not the bully; was once the prey, not the predator. Life in America as one of the few people who did not grow up living there was definitely tough, even for him. Had him clawing through each day, had him fighting for his life. And worst of all, it had him seeing a lot more of the worst of human nature. He always thinks that was the most pathetic point in his life. No matter, that taught him how to conceal such an emotion all too well.

"If there's one thing I learned, though? Just never let them get you down! Power! Through! Always!" He says with much enthusiasm, rambling the last words in English.

“i would.” she says without pretence as memories of her own familial heartbreak and neglect came bubbling through the surface. “pain is an important part of human experience, sure, but to be honest i don’t really care for it. if i could live my entire life without having to experience it, i’d love that.” perhaps she would be a better person because of it. after all, it was her own pain that motivates the more sinister side of herself.