#stablished relationship

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It was week three of recordings and I was already exhausted. Currently in the shared fitting room, I lay down in its huge sofa. Sadie was next to me, on the opposite side of the sofa, rereading her script for the 10th time. she was saying her lines to me, while I pretended to hear.

"Yeah, but boyfriends lie, all the time... Y/n, what do you thing about a pause. I can say 'All. The. Time.' Gives more emphasis." Sadie asked.

"Uhum." I hummed in answer.

My eyes were closing by themselves. Haven't had any time for resting this week, so I was super sleepy. Barely read today's script, but that's problem for the future.

" 'All. The. Time.' Is it better? Kinda sound.... I don't know. Do you thing I'm overthinking y/n?" She poked my legs."Hey! You're not even listening!" I looked to her and sat up.

"Of course I am Sadie. You're gonna be fine, it's not a deep scene. Plus you are amazing by yourself, this will be easy!"

In the exact moment I said that, Caleb burst through our door.

"Shooting time people!" He screamed on his incredibly excited voice.

Me and Sadie looked at each other and got up fast. Then we three started heading to the area it was today's setting. Walked by some more doors and exited the building.

"Hey y/n, you okay? Seem a little tired." Caleb asked looking at me.

I nodded at him. "Yeah I am. didn't have a good night at sleep."

"Oh I'm sorry about it. Bet Finn will cheer you up."

I smiled when he mentioned the curled boy name.

"I'd say he already did." Sadie laughed at us.

"Shut up." I told her, and we finally arrived to the shooting area. The 'Wheeler's house'. It was firsts weeks of recording but the Duffers wanted us to do all footage of each place. So we were working in this house for a bit. Season three, differently from the other two, takes place more outside of Mike's basement than inside. I think seasons from now on will be more like this.

We three entered the house and first thing I saw was Gaten attacking the doughnuts in the 'living room'.

"Leave some for me!" Caleb screamed and runned past me. Sadie laughed and joined them right after. In the corner Millie was talking to Matt and Ross. Nathalia was next to them, leafing through some papers with a cast member. Almost everybody was here. Where was him? My eyes scanned he room trying to find a certain Canadian boy.

"Looking for someone?" I heard a voice say behind me.

I smiled before turning around.

"Actually am. Have you seen this boy right here?" I asked while holding my phone right up to his face, where it had a picture of us together as wallpaper.

"Hum let me see." He pretended to look around with his hand in forehead. "No I don't think so."

I chuckled lightly. Finn walked closer and grabbed me by the waist. I looked at those bright brown eyes. The eyes I fell in love with. My hands went to his face, brushing slowly the freckles that sited just right on his cheeks.

"Hello there girlfriend." Finn said in a lower tone, so just I could hear.

"Hello boyfriend."

We have been dating for just two weeks. It was so recent but at the same time it felt like this my whole life. Being with Finn felt right. He's gaze then moved to my lips, and the curled boy started to down himself a bit, thanks to the height difference. I closed my eyes when his lips brushed mine.

"I missed you." Finn whispered.

I smiled instantly. Before I cold answer, he kissed me. The world disappeared. Right there it was just me and Finn. Nothing else mattered. His hands moved to my face, cupping my cheeks trying to deepen the kiss. It was such a gentle move that I cold fell my heart melting a little. We parted, but our foreheads were still touching.

"I missed you too." I answered him.

I then heard Finn laughing. Suddenly the director started to clap, in a way to call everyone's attention. But Finn didn't move. He stayed there frozen. Opened my eyes only to see the boy already looking at me. Again meeting those lovingly eyes.

"What is it Finn?" I asked him, shy with that burning gaze at me.

"I just love staring at you." He said without a worry in the world. Like I wouldn't think about this all day. Oh shit, I’m lost under this boy’s spell…

It seemed like it was going to be a quiet night anyway. Just you, and your friends, nothing unusual. Though you still didn’t know if you’d be drinking in someone’s house or out out. 

Because those are two very different things. 

If you were in someone’s house, you’d be calm, the lights won’t annoy you, the music won’t be too loud, and there won’t be too many people. 

And you’d promised yourself that even if that happened, you weren’t going to overreact, because these things are normal, and it is okay. You're safe, in someone's house, and out in a club or bar. 

- 

Thankfully the bar was still empty when you arrived. 

And the first round of beers went down pretty quickly. 

So did the second one. 

Nancy was excited. You could tell she was really happy, finally having received her acceptance letter to the college of her dreams. She couldn’t stop blushing every time somebody new walked into the bar and said congratulations. 

Robin was as chatty as ever, as she normally was to be honest. You’d found out that Robin gets excited over other peoples’ excitement, and you often thought to yourself what a good cheerleader she would make if she wasn’t as clumsy as she is. 

Eddie was quiet. It wasn’t unusual, not this early in the evening. He always gets more comfortable once he gets used to the people that are wherever you guys end up, and once he realises that nobody looks at him like he’s a freak anymore, in fact, since Corroded Coffin was gaining a bit of a reputation people tried to get close to him, talk to him. He’d never say it, but he loved it. 

And, Steve. 

Well, he was just electric. Something happened whenever you two were in the same place. He’ll participate in whatever conversation is going on at the table, but for a moment, however brief, he’d look at you, and you swear time would stop. 

You didn’t know why that happened, you just enjoyed it. 

And it was happening right now, as you were finishing your second beer, and he was already asking for the third round, his hand up with the empty bottle, once the barman saw Steve, he putted five fingers up, Steve nodded. 

And as it always happened after two beers, you needed to go out, get some air and smoke. And as always, Eddie walked out with you. 

“You doing okay Henderson?” Eddie muttered as he offered you his lighter, smoke already escaping his lips as he talked. 

“Yeah, just thinking.” You answered quickly, just before lighting the camel you had in your pocket. 

“You need to stop doing all that thinking.” He laughed, trying -with no success- to make you at least chuckle. “You wanna talk about it?” 

“I think you already know if I’m being honest.” Your voice was barely above a whisper, pleading that he won’t make you actually say it. 

“For what it’s worth, I think he’s just as much in his head as you are.” He admitted, as he took one long drag of his cigarette, almost gone now. 

“You’re only saying that because you’re my friend.” You brush it off, not really ready to believe that he might be right, not wanting to believe him, in case he was actually right. 

“And I’m also his friend.” He added, looking into your eyes, a soft smile in his face, and something else that you can’t recognise now. “And honestly, you two… something’s going on, it’s not hard to see it.” 

“Nothing has happened. Nothing can anyway.” You add, as you throw your cigarette to the floor, stomping on it so it’s definitely put out. 

“Why would you say that?” Eddie asks, his eyebrows raised, curiosity filling his voice. 

“Because he still likes Nancy.” 

-

Everyone had paid for one round. And you were now debating if you should go home or stay for a little longer. 

Nancy wanted to leave, and so did Robin. 

Eddie didn’t mind.

Steve wanted to stay. 

And you weren’t sure why but so did you. 

So, the table only had three new beers now, and a louder conversation. 

The bar had filled up, and the music was louder now. So of course you needed to scream a bit to hear each other. Again you weren’t really talking about anything important, just enjoying the company they provided, and the warmth that you felt being in a space with your favourite people. 

“Edds, I’m going out for a smoke break, wanna come?” You asked softly, the yellow packet already on your hand, trying not to feel nervous as you feel Steve looking deep into your eyes. 

“Um, not really… I really need to take a piss.” He laughs a bit more than necessary, the alcohol finally taking him over. 

“I’ll come.” Steve's voice finally could be heard. That stupid smile in his lips anytime he gets to spend quiet time with you. 

“Come on.” You smiled shyly as you stood up, a bit too fast, feeling the alcohol all at once once you finally were out of your chair. 

The cold air was the first thing that you felt, hitting you right in the middle of your chest, though you did not feel its coldness, at least not now. Not when he was right there beside you.

You’ll deny it every time somebody asks, but the way he lights the cigarette was hypnotizing. 

His long fingers curving to stop the wind from blowing away the flame, his lips holding it tightly, his eyes looking down carefully so that he does not burn himself. And just the way his nose and parted lips would shine in a soft orange light once the flame was ignited, it made him look both peaceful and angelic. But honestly, that wasn’t the best part. 

The best part of his little ritual came when he’d scooch over you, his face still -even if it was soft enough that he wouldn't notice- scrunched up, concentrating so that the flame wouldn’t disappear. His hands covering the end of your cigarette now, and he would look at you attentively, holding the lighter until smoke came out of your lips. 

You didn’t pay attention to him in that moment -you never could if you didn’t wanna burn yourself- but if you did you’d see the way his eyes couldn’t stay away from the way your lips look. 

And then, he’d always say and do the same thing. 

First, he takes a step back, so he’s not actually so close to you in case it would annoy you, but his feet would stay pointed at you, just like his attention was fully with you, and the way you look up at him. her and her dove eyes. He thinks he could see them even if he closes his eyes. 

Then his free hand would travel to the top of his head, retouching his hair once again, he does that right before he tilted his head to the left.

Then he always asks the same thing. 

“So, how are you doing?” 

And you’d always say the same thing. 

“Good, I’m doing good.” 

But really, you wanted to say. 

“I’m always good when I’m with you.” 

But it didn’t matter how much you'd drink, you never find the courage. 

But for some reason, today, after he asked you how you were doing he kept talking. 

“I’m not gonna lie to you Henderson, I’m getting pretty drunk today.” And he laughed. I could listen that laugh forever, you kept thinking. Though you didn’t need to say it, he knew it as soon as you smiled up at him and bite your lower lips as you looked at him. 

It drove him mad. 

“Honestly?” You asked as he kept laughing. He nodded and scratched the bridge of his nose with his thumb, cigarette still in his hand. “I’m getting drunk too.”

“Can I tell you something else?” He demanded, his eyebrows raising for just a second, your cheeks starting to hurt from just how much you were smiling. As soon as you nodded he lowered his head, and his voice. “It’s a really stupid thing.” He added, his words slurring a bit. 

“It’s never stupid if you say it.” You say back. It always happened, when you were drunk you could not lie, and with that, you’d say things more sincerely, calmer and softer. Even more when Steve was the one listening to them. 

“You look really pretty today.” 

You were expecting everything but that. Your face lighted up, your eyes shined brighter and you didn’t even know your smile could grow wider. You shook your head and scoffed. A friendly and shocked reaction over such sincerity. 

“You’re an idiot.” It’s the only thing you managed to say back. 

But he knew you were happy. Just as much as he knew his heart had skipped a beat as soon as he saw your eyes squint for a second. It was becoming impossible to act normal around you, he realised. 

You stayed there, under the cold starry sky, not saying anything, and it didn’t matter. You didn’t need to. 

Once you finished smoking in such a comfortable silence it was hard to go back inside, but even if you wanted to stay in that quiet moment, you headed back, only to find Eddie deep in a conversation with a girl you didn’t know. 

Well, it wasn’t really a conversation, more so he had his arm around her waist and was following her out. 

Steve laughed in shock first, after looking at you. 

“Guess that means we’ll have to drink his beer.” You add in a chuckle. 

- 

Your body was all warm and fuzzy. You weren’t going to drink anymore. 

But Steve seemed to keep going, you weren’t sure why, probably just the habit, oblivious to you, it was to calm his nervous thoughts. 

The bar was about to close, and that meant that it was getting quiet again, no need to scream anymore. 

“Your ears get red when you’ve had enough to drink.” You point out touching the tips of Steve’s ears, brushing his hair behind them. You were giggly and touchy, even more so now that no rational thought was in your brain. 

“Well… so does your nose.” He replays back, his eyes softer, as he lets his index finger touch the tip of your nose. “bub.” He adds. You’re not sure if he says it as a reaction to touching it or as a pet name, but you don’t care either way. 

“You’re wasted Harrington.” You giggle as you say his last name, your hands travelling down his neck, into his chest, falling clumsy -but softly- into his lap. He loses his breath for a second as he lets himself enjoy the way your skin feels against his. 

“Like father, like son, right?” He half jokes as he raises the beer he still is working on finishing. 

“What?” You shake your head at him. “No, no way. You look just like your mom.” You add. Your voice feels like a soft song to him at that moment. People never tell him that he looks like his mom, even if he always wanted that. 

“You’re the first person to say that, y’know” He confesses, his hand now resting on his hand, his eyes looking deep into yours. 

“Well… It’s true. Your mom’s beautiful, and so are you.” Your cheeks go red as soon as you realize what you just said. Though you mean every word of it. 

“You think I’m beautiful?” He asks, for a second it seems like he’s mocking you, but you know him well enough to know that he’s just shocked at the way you say things, so truthfully, so honestly. You always have the ability to leave him speechless. 

“Yeah, that’s what I said.” You sound more sure of yourself now, as you snatch a little beer from his bottle, he looks at you with his eyebrows raised, surprised and in absolute awe of you. 

“Not handsome?” You shake your head no as you giggle a bit at him, “Beautifull” He elongates the last L, a grin appearing on his lips. 

That stupid Steve grin. 

“Beautiful people are soft and kind. Not just on the outside, but all of them. That’s you.” His whole expression softened, even more if it was possible. His eyes were a pool of honey and coffee, and they could not stop looking at you, with pure adoration. 

“You’re the one being an idiot now.” 

You giggled as you felt the last sip travel down your throat, you nodded before looking back at him. 

“They’re closing, we should go.” You point out once you see the lights of the bar light up. The universal sign that the night had come to an end. 

-

The ride home was always fun, and worth remembering, every single one. 

This one however, was special. 

Your hand rested on the back of his head, playing with his hair lazily, not really thinking about it. It felt nice, and it was the closest you could be to him. 

That’s what you thought anyway.

What you didn’t expect was Steve deciding to let his hand rest on top of your thigh, not striking it, not squeezing it, it just rested there. His thumb drew a repetitive pattern, a kind of gesture that to you meant I’m here, but to him it screamed I don’t wanna leave.

Once he stopped the car in front of your house, he whipped around to look at you. Once again, he said nothing. He just looked at you. You knew what Robin would say if he saw that, probably something like stop admiring at each other and go to bed, please?. Eddie would probably just laugh and give you a little shove. But right now, the only thing that escaped your lips (that might be trembling because of your nervous heart, or maybe it was because his hand was still in your thigh, and yours was still on the back of his neck) was a soft “Thank you” And he just shook his head, a its nothing gesture. 

Though you weren’t ready for him to get out of his car once you were already on the steps of your house. 

“You okay Steve?” You asked as you saw him approaching. 

He didn’t say anything. 

He just hugged you. 

It had never felt like this. His hands holding you closer than ever, his head resting on the nape of your neck. Of course you returned the feeling, holding him thigh, not wanting to let go. Your head rested on his chest, and you could smell every inch of him. Aftershave, a deep cologne, the beer that you had drank and cigarette smoke. You closed your eyes for a second, trying to memorise how it all felt, how his respiration slowed for that moment, how he took a deep breath before letting you go and how he looked down at you, his honey eyes shining. His cheeks a bit flustered, and you're guessing that yours are too. 

“Yeah. Good night honey.” 

honeyhoneyhoney. 

-

“It would just be a quick drop, you wouldn’t even be five minutes late I swear!” Dustin whined again. He knew he was getting you annoyed, and frustrated, he could tell by the way your eyebrows were scrunched up and your nails were getting buried into your waist, holding tight onto something so you wouldn’t snap at him. 

“It’s not about dropping you off, it’s just…” You always had trouble communicating when you were like this, when your thoughts were going faster than your actions, when you got overwhelmed by things that nobody seemed to get overwhelmed by. “I’m supposed to go to Edds show, and I really don’t want to be late, because if I am, I might not find them and then that would mean I-”

“They’ll wait for you.” He looked down at the floor, his hands had his fingers intertwined, the same anxious tick you had, it looks like he inherited that too. “Please? Will goes back to California in a couple days and we really want to finish his campaign.”

You nodded, you understood the need to see someone, a friend. You know how much Dustin misses Will when he’s not around. He nodded back, and he sat on top of your bed. Happy. Calm, not pushing your buttons anymore. 

“So… Who’s going?” 

“Where?”

“To Eddie’s show.” He gestured with his hands, a weird look in his face that you had no time to get into. 

“Um, Robin and Steve.” You add back, your voice a bit higher in pitch, turning your back so you can look into your closet, hoping to find something that might work. Your indecision -you often think- is the worst thing that happens to you. “Nancy was supposed to come but she said something came up, so…”

“She didn’t tell you?” The tone of his voice made you turn fast to him, a shocked honesty that makes you wonder. 

“Tell me what?”

“Her and Jonathan got back together.” 

“Oh.” oh. “How do you know?” Your ears were ringing, poor Steve you thought. Poor heart-broken Steve, the only thing you ever wanted for him was for him to be happy, it didn’t matter with who, as long as he actually loved the person and was loved in return. 

“Steve told me.” Even if your little brother’s voice was calm, he was still looking at you with that same look. The one he uses when he’s trying to gather information, seeking a reaction, and if you were being honest, he was getting one. 

“Is Steve okay?” You needed to know, because right now it was all you could think about, about the kind boy that deserves to be loved, even if it can’t be by you. 

“You’re kidding? He helped Jonathan get her back!” That confused you even further, why would Steve help him get the girl he’s in love, get together with someone else. You turned back and started grabbing different tops and shirts and laying them above the bed. 

“Why would he do that? Isn’t he like, in love with Nance?” The way he started laughing made your shoulders tense for a second, jumping at such a reaction. “What are you laughing for?”

“He’s not in love with her! Jesus, you can be blind sometimes…” The palm of his face brushes his face as he looks at you, a puzzled look still on yours. 

“I don’t know what you’re on kid, but I need to get ready and have no clue what to actually wear so…” He picked up the white tank top and threw it to you. 

“You’re an idiot sometimes, you know that?” Dustins i’m much clever than you tone came back as he stood up. You rolled your eyes at him and gave him a petty smile. 

“Yeah, I’ve been told.” 

-

As you parked outside where Eddie was playing, a few minutes late, you grew nervous. The parking lot was full of cars, and finding a spot took longer than you anticipated, so by the time you found a spot and got to the entrance, the queue only seemed longer and longer. People standing in a not-so-neat line, chatting amongst themselves, shivering away the coldness of the night. Cigarette smoke and off-key lyrics filled the ambient of the people pulled away. 

You realise at that moment, you didn’t have a ticket. 

Steve and Robin had gotten in with Eddie. 

And you had no idea how to get in, so you took a quick lap to see if you found someone, anyone. 

Thankfully for you, Steve was by the entrance door, chatting away with one of the security guys. Even if Steve was tall, and had a wide back, the man talking to him toward over him, it almost made you giggle, seeing him as someone smaller, when he usually was the one that filled the room, even with just his presence. 

As you walked to him, smoke escaping your lips and a scent of burnt smoke following you, you remembered the conversation you had with Dustin. And still, you didn’t believe him, at least not until you saw the way his demeanor changed when you approached him, and a relieved “Steve” came out of you. 

Steve lost his breath for a moment. 

You looked truly angelic, and you didn’t even need to try. You in that white tank top that made your breasts appear larger, more exposed than they’re usually are, your hair down, letting the left side of your neck free, as the wind blew, and your jeans hugging every curve of your body. It drove him mad. Even worse, he always loved when you wore red lipstick, like tonight. 

Of course he wasn’t in love with anyone but you. 

But you didn’t know. 

The same way he didn’t know just how much it drove you crazy when his shirts hugged his arms like that, his veins more prominent when his arms were crossed on his chest. His hair always seemed to float, like it had a gravity of his own, but that single strand of hair that felt in between his eyes made you focus on him more. His soft honey dark eyes that were only looking at you, half lidded and full of adoration. It drove you crazy.

Of course you weren’t in love with anyone but him. 

But he didn’t know. 

Just like you had thought until a few hours ago that he still loved, or liked Nancy, it wasn’t until he had picked up Robin a few minutes ago that he didn’t find out that what you had with Eddie was purely platonic. Robin had laughed just as much as Dustin did, and called him an idiot all the same. But still, you both thought that your feelings weren’t returned, because that would be too perfect to be real. Impossible, just a dream. 

However, the way your name sounded when Steve said it made you forget about everything else, and just focus on him. 

A quick hug, not like the one he had given you that night he had driven you the night after you’d spent your entire night in a bar. You had come to realise, he became braver once some time had passed, and so did you. 

So you headed inside, where Robin was waiting for the both of you in the bar, a warm welcome and a big cheers with some beers that you grabbed as you moved further into the pit. 

The crowd was electric, everyone cheering for the show to start, eager to sing along with the band. You followed along, screamed when Corroded Coffin finally came on stage, whoo’d Eddie when he asked How are you doing Indianapolis and laughed when he admitted that he missed saying how are you Hawkins. 

Robin cheered the loudest and it made Steve laugh. One of those authentic, closing your eyes and holding your stomach kind of laughs. You thought that it was one of the highlights of the night already. 

But as these things often go, once Eddie’s band was over, and the next one came, the bar got even more crowded, and the lights felt brighter, and everyone seemed to be looking at you, judging or god knows what. Everyone seemed to bump into you, and you had already pulled the glue out of your empty cristal bottle on both sides. Breathing was becoming a hard task, and so did hearing anything that was being said to you. 

“Honey” You heard Steve as soon as you felt his warm hand on your shoulder. You looked up to him, a haze in your eyes.”Are you okay?” He halved screamed into your ear, his breath lingering into your skin. 

You pull him closer for a moment, afraid he might not listen. 

“Too many people.” You’re not sure if he could hear you, or what he could do. You try even harder to relax your breathing, to stop looking around. But it all ends when you feel his fingers intertwined with yours. 

You look up to him, he just nods to Robin who nods back at him, and he starts walking to the back of the pit, the lights seem to not burn anymore, and the people are few and far between. He just stays there, with you for a second before he opens his mouth. Looking at you and the way your eyes are scanning every single person in the room, looking for something that you don’t know what is.

“Honey?” There it is again, the soft worried Steve voice, his attention only on you. 

You look back at him, as you feel his hand grabbing yours thighter. He’s the only thing you’re looking at now. 

“Do you need to get out? Get some air?” He knows you won’t actually answer, but takes the nodding that you do as a clear enough sign. 

The creaking of the door and the friendly doorman brings you back down to earth, and so does the wind hitting your chest. 

“Better?” He asks again, desperate for some sort of confirmation from you. 

“Yeah, I just- Sorry…” You sort of mumble, more to yourself than to him. 

In that moment you realise that your hands are still tangled together, and the blood rushes to your cheeks as soon as you look down at them. They fit together so naturally, you think. Like a missing piece of a puzzle. 

“Don’t apologize. We’ll stay here as long as you need, ‘s fine.” You instinctively bite the inside of your cheek as you nod at him, a soft smile, a thank you of sort appears on your face, as does a grin on his. 

Without letting go of you, he reaches down into his jeans front pocket, and takes out a box of Camel, offering you to take one. Smoking might be bad for your lungs, but it does help with regulating your breathing, and he knew that’s just what you needed, and honestly, you were craving one, so you nodded again, searching for a lighter with the cigarette already in between your lips. Before you even find it, you feel the warmth of fire close to your mouth, and you just inhale the smoke. 

“Thank you…” He shakes his head, as he inches closer to you, the same strand of hair falling between his eyes again. 

“There’s no need for that.” He whispers, his words just as sweet as he is. His free hand pushes your hair behind your ear, and falls slowly to the nape of your neck, letting it rest there for just a second, his thumb stroking the end of your jaw in soft short motions, holding you up so you look at him, your doe eyes looking deep into his, he swears he could melt right here and there. You were driving him crazier everyday with the way you looked at him. 

For a second there, he thinks you might even love him back. 

“I just don’t know why I get like that, when there’s so many… I dunno” you scoff off, as your shoulders shrug ever so slightly, enough for him to catch, enough for your hair to move again and let the smell of your shampoo reach him. “I’m okay, don’t worry.” You say with a smile. 

He looks deep into his eyes, looking for any sign that you might be lying, he doesn’t find any. And he likes to think that you’re better because of him. It's funny how right he is. 

“We can stay here as long as you need.” Steve reasures you once again, getting closer again. Your body and his only a push away from touching. 

“You’re always so sweet to me.” You’re thinking out loud now, you bite your lower lip as soon as you see him mask his blush with a soft chuckle, as his grin deepens, and you stop for a second to look at his pretty pink lips. You even let yourself imagine what it would be like to kiss them. 

Steve debates what to do next. He knows you’re not lying, he knows that you’re being sincere and truthful. He can tell by the way your eyes are half lidded, looking at him like you’re in the safest space possible -even when you’re actually outside downtown Indianapolis- so in the end, he just wraps his arms around you. And he holds you even tighter when he feels you wrapping your arms behind his neck, and the way you stand on your tiptoes so you can hold him closer, your leg between his, his hands playing with the ends of your air. He breathes you in, intoxicating himself with the way you smell. You’re worried he’ll feel just how fast your heart is beating. But you’re too occupied smiling deeply and sincerely. 

He feels safe. 

Yes, there might be some butterflies, but they’re not nervous ones, it’s all just calmness. Love even. 

-

He ends up paying for your drinks, and you spend the night dancing at the back of the pit with Robin and eventually Eddie joins you. You laugh, and dance around, sing the songs off key with Robin making Eddie laugh as he joins you. Admiring the way Steve covers his face embarrassed, that the idiots causing the whole club to cheer you on as you move are indeed his friends. But what makes you have the deepest smile is everytime you catch Steve eyes, thay always seem to be on you. He even dances with you a couple times when Robin or Eddie go away to the bathroom or to grab more drinks. 

You don’t care because he is here and everything feels right. 

But the night was coming to an end, and you still were buzzing with energy. 

Even outside, where the cold wind wrapped around you you were still singing and dancing until Eddie started speaking. 

“Steve, can I take your car?” He asks, and it makes you all turn around and look at him. 

“What for? Where’s your van?” Robin followed, her voice raised a little too loud. 

“I think Gareth might have taken it.” Eddie explains as he points at his van driving away, with Gareth in the driver’s seat. You can’t help but laugh a bit, stopping slowly as you feel Steve laying his arm around your shoulders, you let yourself think of it as an embrace. Or maybe he was just cold. 

“Who’ll drive me home?” He mutters as he searches for the keys in his pocket. 

“I’ll drive you.” You say, looking up at him. Steve’s eyes shine brighter, with that look. A look you have only seen in him once before, long ago. 

“Sure.” He mutters, a grin in his face. “You won’t kill us?” He jokes as he pushes some hair away from your face with the hand that rests right where your neck meets your shoulder.

“I’ll come with you” Robin mumbles as she approaches Eddie, her eyebrows raised. 

Steve knows that if Robin could talk to him now she would plead with him, to actually make a move. He decides that she’s right. 

“Alright, let’s get home.” Eddie winks at you, a look that begs you to be careful. He grabs the keys that Steve throws him, the jingle of them making you realise that this was actually happening. 

You blame it on the alcohol. But you have to admit that holding his waist was something you have wanted to do for so long its feels fucking angelic once your fingers touch his skin, under his shirt, right above the seam of his jeans. 

Steve chews gum when he’s nervous, and the minty flavor, or maybe the amount of beer inside his system makes him say the most stupid thing ever. 

“Do you like gum?” 

“Yeah” 

“You want some?” 

“Sure.” You stop, expecting him to reach down his pocket and grab the small packet. You part your lips open expecting him to do so. Instead, Steve in a bold move opens his mouth and pulls you closer. 

Before you can even process what he’s doing, his thumb reaches your jaw, opening your mouth a bit more for you, and you see the way his tongue places the minty gum on your lips. You had closed your eyes. Thinking he was going to do something else. 

It had made you nervous and weak all the same. You can’t help but think, as you take a few steps, your hand holding even tighter onto him, that was one of the hottest things you had ever seen. 

It got better. 

After a few steps he talked again. His voice sultier, deeper. His eyes somehow were darker, but still looked like they were full of adoration for you. 

“Does that gum still have some taste on it?” 

“Yeah, minty” You manage to say. 

“Can I have some?” 

This time around, it's you who grabs him. And you can feel the way he smiles at that, and the way his fingers hold your face up again to meet him. This time it’s you who gives him the gum back. 

Only, you place it between your lips, and it's his tongue that gets it. 

In that moment you know, you’re fucked. 

And so does he. 

-

“Honey?” He asks as he sees you pulling into his street. 

The whole drive back home had been exactly like the last time. Except this time the way he would caress your leg felt hungry for your touch back, and your fingers would end up intertwined, singing the songs that came into the radio, not really paying attention, all of it focused on the way he was playing with your fingers. 

“Mmmh?” 

“My car keys may have been chained to my house keys.” He admits, embarrassed, as he covers his face. You can’t help but look at him and laugh a bit. 

“S’okay, you can sleepover.” He nods and you change directions. 

And before you know it you’re already parked, and he’s already following you inside. 

That’s when it hits you. 

Steve is in your room. 

Steve is sleeping over in your bed. 

Steve had practically kissed you. 

whatthehellisgoingon

You shake your head, not wanting to read too much into things that haven’t and might never happen. 

“I uh… I’m going to change.” You whisper, a bit of shame could be felt on your words, and Steve just nodded, lost in the sight that was you in your room. “Do you need anything?” 

“No, I… Usually just sleep with my boxers on.” That confession made you blush and bite your lower lip as you nodded. Not really knowing what to do or say. 

So you just turned around, you took off your bra, tossing it on the floor before you took off the white tank you had. You reached for your sleep shirt. An old grey shirt that was way overdue to throw away, but it was long enough and soft enough that you felt it was perfect for sleeping in. So, Steve just enjoyed the show. 

He stayed there, watching the way your body moved. He was the one that had his eyebrows raised, his chest racing and his cheeks flushed. He was lost in you. And you were painfully obvious that he was looking, maybe that’s why you take a bit longer to take off your tank top before putting on the gray shirt. Maybe that's why your heart skips a beat when you hear the sound of his belt hitting the ground at the same time that his jeans did. While you took your own jeans off, he took off his shirt. 

You knew you had to turn around now. 

And as you did you go lost in him. 

Him standing there, in nothing but his black boxers, framing all of him. Him and his chest with some hair, trailing all the way down to his waistband. That was an image you probably would never be able to forget. 

He took the first step. A soft grin appears in his lips once again. As he pushes the same flock of hair behind your ear, you can't help but tilt your head into his touch. He takes another step forwards, and just looks at you, deep into your eyes. You both chuckle, nervously at the situation, and like before, he holds you. Thight. Only this time, you can feel him against your leg. It makes you press your own legs together a bit more. 

Once he lets go, you slide into the bed, and he closes the lights, following you closely. 

“Is it okay if you hug me?” You ask. 

“Mmh.” He’s at a loss for words. 

He cuddles you, feeling you closer than ever before. And one of his hands gets lost into your thigh, right where your waistband meets your skin, tracing it. Softly. It drives you insane. Steve’s breathing into your hair, and you can feel how his breathing is fastening, just as much he can feel yours, by the way your stomach goes up and down. He can’t help himself anymore. He leaves a wet kiss on your neck. 

That’s all it takes. 

You turn around and you know you’re fucked. You can’t hold yourself anymore. You explote. 

You kiss him. 

The way his lips press against yours feels like he really wanted this, maybe even as much as you did. Your body pulls him closer, and his leg finds itself tangled in between yours. He’s lost in you and the way your mouth feels. He bites your lower lip, softly. And as soon as you feel the tug a soft whimper escapes your lips. Steve melts into you even more, his legs putting pressure in that spot between your legs that is already throbbing for him. Your hands find the back of his neck, and become buried into his hair. His soft chestnut hair. His hands begin to train up, inside your shirt. Holding your waist harder than before. Another moan escapes your kiss swollen lips, and he grunts in return. 

He tries to memorise you, and the way you look like now. To him, you’re a goddess fallen from the sky, and he’s the lucky one. 

He climbs above you, tracing kisses down your neck, as his hands travel up, up enough to meet your breast and press down, even carefully he’s strong enough and skilled enough to pinch your nipples, making them hard. And your legs wrap around him, and you can’t quite believe just how big he’s gotten just from kissing you. 

His hands take off your shirt and as soon as he looks at you he’s a goner. 

“Fuck, you’re beautifull honey.” He groans. A deep voice you’ve never heard from him. 

It makes you pull him closer. And he starts to move, his cock and your clit being only separated by the small fabric between you both. 

“Can I-” He cuts you off as he looks up at you, stopping the trail of kisses he wanted to finish on your left breast. 

“You can do anything you want to me honey” 

You can’t help yourself. The wetness patch only growing on your thong. You needed him, but you were so desperate to touch him, to see him. 

You flipped him around, leaving him laid on your mattress, his hands up in shock. He’s surprised by you in the best way possible. 

You were the one kissing him senseless now, as you grind on top of him. HE grew harder and stiffer with every time your clit pressed against him. His hands grabbed your ass in that moment, hard and burying his fingers as deep as he could. You wasted no time kissing every beauty mark that you could see, slowly going down his stomach, his breath shortening, sucking in and groaning your name in the most delicious way you have never heard anyone say it. 

Your hands found the hem of his underwear and pulled it down. He was so big. His pink tip already wet with pre-cum, and it was all because and for you. Your eyes widened with desire, you had to taste him. 

So you did. 

It only took a lick for Steve to shiver, and that made nothing but turn you on even more. His hand had now started to press on your clit through the fabric. It didn’t matter, it felt too good. 

So, as you looked deep into his eyes, you wrapped your lips around him, and you went down. 

Steve had never been more desperate, the eye contact, you and your pretty doe eyes looking at him like he was the only thing in the world. 

His fingers had pushed your thong to your side, and started messing around your entrance, it wasn’t until his waist flinched forward, making you swallow him whole, that he didn’t actually finger you. 

But once he did, he couldn’t stop, and neither could you. 

The way you moaned, with him still inside you, the way your waist moved, letting him get more aces into you, it drove him mad, he needed you, like really needed you. 

“Steve, please” You begged. 

That’s all it took. 

His hands took off your thong and pulled you up, he kissed you deeply, his tongue getting lost with yours. Your soft lips fit perfectly with his, and the wetness of his cock still in them. 

He was above you again. Three fingers in, your legs already up, he had you prepared you enough for him to enter, but anyway, when you felt the way his cock slided into you, your walls tensed up for a second, and you both moaned as soon as you felt each other. 

“God, you feel so nice honey” He whispered into your ear before biting it. 

Your legs wrapped around him, tightly, and your hands were on his back, pushing him deeper. He wanted to go slow, but seeing you so helpless, so needy for him, made him pick up the pace. With every thrust, your eyes rolled deeper into your head, your muscles relaxed, and your feet were pointed. 

The warmth of his skin felt so good against yours you felt as if it would never be enough, even if you wanted to scream his name, you couldn’t. Everyone was sleeping. So you did the only thing you could.

“I’ve wanted you for so long Steve '' You whispered into his ears in between thrusts. You felt how his head hangs lower after that, his back arched so he could reach even lower. And when you thought he was as deep as he could, he placed an arm behind you, reaching that place that even you couldn’t. 

“So have I honey.” He admitted before kissing you, a deep, wet kiss. Followed by many more repressed moans and loud groans. “I’m all yours.” 

“I’m all yours” You repeated. 

He grabbed your leg and pushed it up, he was so deep now you could feel him everywhere. You were lost in him. The way his hair bounced, the way his eyes looked at you, his lips swollen because he couldn’t and wouldn’t stop kissing you. 

He was a goner. And so were you. 

You hadn’t come this hard in so long. 

You melted into eachothers arms. 

You had a silent moment, where it was all soft kisses and caresses. You couldn’t quite believe that that had just happened. 

Or how good it had been. 

“I meant it.” You heard him whisper, his lips pressed against your ear. 

“What?” 

“I’m all yours.” He repeats. Leaving a kiss in your hair. “I’ve always been.”

“I mean it too.” You let him know, your nose brushing his, your fingers tangled with his. “I’ve liked you for so long, my love.” 

He laughs a bit. Maybe it was the confession he had just got out of you, maybe it was because you had just called him my love. 

“God, me too.” He finally admits, a weight being pulled away from his chest. “But I thought you had a thing for Eddie.” 

“And I thought you still loved-” He shuts you up with a kiss. 

“We broke up because I was falling for you.” He finally admits. 

You can’t stop smiling or kissing. 

You don’t think you ever will. 

-

if you enjoyed it please leave a comment or reblog. i promise it makes a huge difference <3

“Hi, I’m sorry to bother you, but I can’t seem to find someone to help and I just wanted to know where can I find watercolor brushes, do you happen to know where they are?” The girl in the pretty dress offered him a sweet smile.

“Oh, it’s okay, you’re not a bother, what kind of watercolor brushes you’re looking for?”

“Oh God, there are types of those?!” she sounded pretty much defeated, letting out a sigh and he couldn’t hold back a chuckle.

“What do you have in mind to paint with those?”

“It’s not even for me! I can’t draw a basic heart shape for dear life, I’m here to buy the supplies for someone, but he forgot to mention the details about it and I don’t know anything about art rather than history and which work I find pretty or not”

“It’s all about practice, honey” the pet name slipped of his tongue before he could hold back but she didn’t seem alarmed or weirded out by it, just blushed a bit harder and shook her head.

“I can guarantee you I’m a lost cause”

“I doubt that, but about the supplies, did he give you a list or something?”

“Oh, yeah!” she replied reaching into the inner pocket of her jacket for a little piece of paper with a delicate handwriting on it “I wrote it down in here”

“I think I might be able to help if you want” Raul offered doing a once over the little list.

“Oh please, this would be perfect”

“Okay, so what did your pick up already?”

“Hm, a few types of paper and some pencils” she gave him her little basket “Here!”

“Oh, okay, so we have to find the brushes and the paint” he said and she nodded, following him around the store like a lost puppy “here are the paints he requested, we just have to find the shades”

And with that they started going through the little numbers on the little containers and talk about random stuff. Raul never had so much fun looking through shades of paint with anyone before. She was just funny and pleasant to talk with, not to mention effortlessly beautiful.

“Now the brushes?”

“Yeah, they’re over here, I’d recommend this ones here for the sort of thing you told he’s trying to do, maybe from this sizes” Raul said picking them up.

“Oh, fine”

“Anything else?”

“I guess this is it! Thank you so much, I’d probably have spent the whole day trying to figure this whole thing out alone”

“It’s my pleasure to help, no need to thank me, next time you know where the stuff are”

“Trust me, there won’t be next time, Nick can come here by himself, if it weren’t for you I’d be screwed”

“Well, at least your boyfriend won’t be needing to come back so soon with everything you’re taking”

“Nick’s not my boyfriend” she said chuckling “he’s just a lazy ass friend and I needed to come here to pick up some stuff for work”

“Oh, sorry, I didn’t mean to make you uncomfortable”

“No, you didn’t do it at all, I’m sorry, I didn’t catch your name”

“Raul”

“Oh, well, thank you, Raul, I’m Y/N”

“It’s a beautiful name” Raul said and she smiled at him, blushing lightly.

“Thank you, I’m sorry for bothering you, do you need any help?”

“It’s okay, and you don’t need to help me, only if you want to”

“I do! What do you need?” she offered as he picked up her basket from the floor and guided her to where he was previously.

“I was looking for a particular shade of blue but I can’t seem to find, and I tried mixing some shades to get to them but I can’t”

“Oh, do you have a picture of it?” she asked looking at the huge wall of oil paint.

He unlocked his phone and offered to her “This one”

“I think I saw it earlier, it caught my eye as soon as I walked in here” she said walking in the opposite direction and crouching down “here”

As Raul got a bit closer he noticed it was the perfect shade and he couldn’t hold back a smile “It’s exactly it! Thank you!”

“You’re welcome” she grabbed her stuff with a smile “it was nice meeting you, Raul”

“It was nice meeting you too, Y/N” he said and she waved at him, turning around to pay for her stuff as he stood there contemplating on asking her out, but before he could think about it better.

“Hey, Raul?” she called from where she stood at the cashier counter and he turned to face her “are you busy right now? There’s a new coffee shop down the block and I was wondering if you’d like to go with me”

Right now it didn’t matter the painting he was eager to go home to finish, all he wanted to do was sit down with her at a table and drink coffee until he couldn’t take it anymore.

So he just smiled at her and said “Sure”

And since then they’ve been inseparable.

So it’s no surprise when called her on a Friday to invite her to come over, they had plans to go out and catch a movie but he was too tired and she was thankful, her day at work was insane and all she needed was to relax a bit. And even though she hadn’t spent the night at his place many times before and she’d probably get all jittery about it, she was too tired to care. So when she arrived with a bottle of whine to the smell of homemade pasta mixed with Raul’s signature cologne, she was almost certain she was in heaven. He told her to just walk in and lock the door behind her, so she did, placing her stuff neatly near the door alongside with his and her boots.

She knew the place well enough to find him in the kitchen, listening to a random song as he hummed along facing the stove where he was preparing something. Staring was bad, but she couldn’t help it when he was looking all soft. It was the first time she’s ever seen him wearing a hoodie and she was so grateful it was starting to get a bit colder, specially during the night, so she would have such a blessed vision. Y/N placed the bottle on the counter, clearing her throat softly to let him know she was already there, which made him look over his shoulder with a soft smile playing on his gorgeous lips.

“Hey, pretty girl” he greeted turning off the stove and turning to face her, opening his arms for her, to which she gladly walked into.

She buried her face on the soft material of his hoodie as she mumbled a soft “hi” in response.

“Tired?” he asked and Y/N just nodded, so he placed a kiss to her hair and hummed “food’s almost ready, want to wait for it on the living room? You can pick the movie” and with that she nodded, reluctantly unwrapping herself from him and basically dragging herself to his fluffy rug.

Raul only chuckled in response.

“There’s a bottle of whine somewhere in the kitchen I just brought” she told him from where she was sitting on the floor by his coffee table.

“Thanks, babe” was his only response as he couldn’t hold back his smile.

Raul could get used to this whole kinda domestic atmosphere. Y/N coming home from work a bit later than him, tired and stressed, so he would cook her dinner and cuddle on his living room while watching a movie and drinking some whine or whatever. And maybe, they could switch places and when he’s feeling a bit overwhelmed and stressed, she could run him a bath and rub his back. But he couldn’t think about it now. It was too soon and he didn’t know if she would want that. This was the first time they would actually spend some time at home together that wasn’t between his  sheets (or hers), and breakfast in the morning. He’s not allowing himself to get all fucked up for someone and having his heart broken, he’s seen this movie before and he didn’t like it.

But all his insecurities died when he found her sitting on the floor by his coffee table, her legs close to her chest and she was staring at the screen, waiting patiently for him to start the movie, knowing he’s seen it a billion times and wouldn’t mind sitting down in the middle of it. He just felt like wrapping her in his arms and tucking her into his chest, but he didn’t, instead he set the plates and glasses down as he plopped down beside her. She then leaned forward and pressed play, and as the screen started to gain some life, she turned to him and pressed and soft kiss at the corner of his mouth.

“Thank you, this is just what I needed”

“Yeah, I needed this too” he said trying to fight his smile.

“Tough day?”

“A bit, but now it’s okay” he said and she just nodded, quickly changing the subject, and he was happy she just got him and that sometimes he didn’t need or want to talk about it, and respected it.

“This is amazing! Is it your mom’s recipe?”

“Nonna’s actually” he replied and she smiled at him.

“Well, it’s fantastic”

And from that, they just fell into easy conversation. They both could feel the stress literally lifting off their bones and melting away in each other’s presence. And it was always like this, simple and easy, they could read each other like a book and always fulfill their needs easily. So when they’re done with dinner, she picked up their stuff, under his protest and took to the kitchen, putting it on his dishwasher, claiming he did all the work cooking it was the least she could do. And when she was back, the sat back down on the floor since they were too comfortable before to move to the couch.

Raul’s always been a fan of cuddling, one of his “biggest” secret. He’d never initiate it, afraid the other person would reject it or him and Y/N never showed any signs she was a cuddle bug either, which is way they never really cuddled. So when she was slowly inching closer to him and leaning on his side, he was surprised, but in a good way. Raul let his arm casually drop on her shoulder and she leaned in further into his chest, until she was basically almost on top of him, with their limbs tangled under the coffee table and he wasn’t upset with it at all. He started drawing little patterns on her back and in return she placed a kiss on his chest, nuzzling her face there a bit.

So when he felt she was falling asleep towards the end of the movie, he decided to coax her to bed, and it wasn’t as easy as he thought. She whined a bit whenever he attempted to move, only calming down when he told her he was taking them to bed so they could lay down together. After that she seemed to be more aware and a bit embarrassed by her previous clingy state, so she just nodded and got up, getting her stuff by the door and following him to his bed. They both followed their nightly routine normally and laid down. He tempted reaching a hand to hold hers, and she turned on her side to face him as he did the same, lacing their pinkies together over the duvet.

“I’m sorry” she whispered, afraid to disturb their peaceful bubble.

“About what?”

“Leaning so much into you, never asked you if you minded, I guess I was just tired and didn’t really think about invading your personal space”

“Hey, hey, hey” he said gently squeezing their laced fingers “I didn’t mind at all, I actually liked it, I like being close, I just thought you didn’t so I never tried it”

“Oh really? I’m sorry, I actually really like cuddling, it’s just I was afraid it would upset you so I never did, it’s just that today you were looking extra soft and cute, I guess my exhausted brain didn’t care and just went for it”

“Well- I’m glad it did” Raul said placing a kiss on the back of her hand and she automatically shuffled closer to him, which made him place a hand on her waist, pulling her a bit closer to him.

“I think it was the hoodie”

“The hoodie did it for you?” Raul asked with a smirk and she giggled, her eyes looking a lot smaller from exhaustion.

“Oh, shut up” she said with a roll of the eyes as she reached to play of the curls at the back of his head, something she found out he liked very much “but yeah, it’s just- you’re always looking like a runaway model or an actor from a movie, so seeing you so cozy and soft just-“

“Did it for you?” he offered with a boyish glint on his honey orbes.

“Yes, Raul, it did it for me” she said holding back a giggle as she rolled her eyes “Happy?”

“Very much” he said rolling over her making her squeal “you’re cute”

“You’re cuter” she said with a lazy grin on her lips and he leaned down to press a soft kiss to it.

“You need to rest” he said after pulling away, but before he could lay back, she wrapped her arms around his neck keeping him in place.

“Can we-?”

“Cuddle?” he finished her sentence and she nodded sheepishly “of course we can, baby”

“Thank you” she mumbled as he laid back and pulled her to his chest.

“No need to thank me, you’re doing me a favor”

“Trust me, I’m not” she said with a yawn.

“Time to go to sleep, Y/N, doctor’s order”

“You’re way too bossy, Doc” she said nuzzling her face on his chest “but I’m to tired to argue back, so goodnight, Raul”

“Goodnight, pretty girl”

                                                    -*-

Since the first time she saw him in a hoodie and actually made her cuddle him for the first time as well, she noticed he were it a lot more often. Sure, it was getting colder, but he wasn’t being discreet about it. And since that day he couldn’t stop himself from picturing Y/N in his hoodie on a lazy Friday night, a face mask, some movie playing on the background as she painted both of their nails. But he just didn’t know how to bring it up and not make a fool of himself. She never made a move about asking to use his clothes or whatever. Sure, she always complimented him on his style and he knew a few particular pieces that got certain reactions from her, but she never told him she’d like to wear them.

So he was having a bit of a dilemma. Should he ask her to use his hoodie or just get over it?

He decided for the later, just pretend he didn’t want to come home to find her laying on his couch drowning on his clothes and blankets. But after a few days he gave up, he had what he thought to be a brilliant idea. Raul was going to put one of his hoodies on her wardrobe without her knowing, and if she found it and decided to wear, it was a sign she would be okay with it, and since she wasn’t going to know he was the one who placed it there, he wouldn’t be feeling like he was being pushy. And that’s what he did.

He went to her house on a Tuesday to watch their show and was discreet enough to just throw it on her top drawer and come back to the living room as if nothing happened while she was cooking them something. And since she didn’t say anything about it or tried to return it he felt a bit better, so that could mean two things -she didn’t find it or she didn’t mind. And they’re both kinda great and he was a bit relieved. That until he was heading home Saturday evening for their lazy night date or whatever Y/N called it. So when his phone rang and her name appeared on the screen he didn’t think much of it.

“Hi, pretty girl, are you there already? I’m sorry if I’m a bit late, there was this kid that really needed help”

“Oh, I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to bother you”

“No, I’m already done, I’m leaving now”

“Oh, okay, I still at home, just got here, I’m picking up some stuff, what do you want me to bring?”

“You don’t need to bring anything, baby, we can order something or I can go grab whatever you want”

“Okay, so I’m just going to pack my stuff and I’ll meet you there, is that alright?”

“That’s perfect” Raul said already smiling like the love sick puppy he’s becoming, climbing on his car.

“Oh, by the way, you’re a sneaky little thing, aren’t you?”

“What do you mean?” he let out a nervous chuckle to mask the high pitched voice he almost let out.

“I’ll talk to you at your place, drive safely, Sherlock, bye now!”

“Wait, Y/N!” he tried but she already hung up and he could literally feel his face burning.

                                                     -*-

Raul’s never felt so nervous about Y/N before. The drive to his place was relatively short and he spent the whole ride chewing on his lower lip, tapping the steering wheel and regretting every life decision he’s ever made. He knew there was no need to feel like this, she clearly wasn’t upset and sounded playful on the phone, but he was really embarrassed. He should have just asked her, he knew she wouldn’t find it weird, but he was too insecure to do so and now he has to deal with this. He got up to his apartment and did his routine to take a quick shower and change into something comfy completely robotically, mind still a hundred miles per second. And when he heard his doorbell he basically ran to the door, tripping at everything on his way there.

He opened the door ready to apologize and completely breathless, but when his eyes met her frame adorned on his hoodie he swear his heart just stopped. She giggled at his reaction and stood on her tippy toes to press a single kiss to his lips. He stepped back to let her in still in shock as she walked into his apartment. He could clearly hear her voice cheerfully telling about something, but he didn’t register a single word, mind still racing but this time he didn’t even know what to say or do. She must have noticed him standing awkwardly beside the still opened door, so she walked back to him and placed a gentle hand on his cheek.

“Are you okay, Raul?” her voice sounder a bit more worried and her brows were turned into a frown “what’s wrong?”

“I’m- I’m sorry” was all he could mumble out and the frown on her face o my deepened.

“About what, baby?”

“The hoodie, I- I shouldn’t have tried to give it to you without asking if you minded, and I’m sorry I suck at communicating, and I-“ he started and he felt the blush raising on his cheeks.

“Hey, stop it” she said letting her stuff fall on the floor trying to cup his cheeks in both of her hands “Baby, stop apologizing, I’m not mad at you at all, I found it really sweet actually”

“You did?”

“Of course, Raul! You told me you were not the best with relationships when we first started dating and Peter told me sometimes you get really insecure and I know what I was getting myself into from the beginning and turned out you’re not bad at it at all!”

“No?”

“No, honey, the fact that you care enough about how I’d feel if you asked me to wear this is the sweetest thing, it means you don’t want to push anything on me and that you care, and that’s great”

“It is?”

“Mhmm” Y/N hummed starting to caress his cheek “just so you know, this feels very comfortable and I wouldn’t mind wearing at all, I actually like it”

“Good to know” he said wrapping his arms around her waist and pulling her closer.

“That is my boy” she said and he laughed, pressing a kiss to her forehead “I’m sorry if I scared you or anything, didn’t mean to frighten you”

“It’s okay, I should’ve known you’d be okay with this”

“Next time just tell me, okay? I don’t bite”

“I can prove the opposite”

“Oh shut up for a sec, will you?” she tried to sound mad, but the smile on her voice told otherwise “but I’m serious when I tell you to just talk to me”

“I know, I’ll try, I guess I’m just scared to lose you or be an idiot”

“You won’t, I really really care about you”

“And I’m in love with you”

“What?!”

“Yeah” he said smiling sheepishly with a blush creeping up his cheeks.

“I kinda am in love with you too” she replied as he pressed their lips together in a gentle kiss.

And with that, he was sure everything fell into place and his heart calmed down a bit. He had his girlfriend on his arms and that was an angel for understanding him like she does. But before he could deepen the kiss she pulled back.

“Okay, now that we’re fine, can you please shut the door? Don’t want your neighbors knowing everything about us just yet” she said giggling and Raul laughed, closing the door with a click, still holding her close like she could just disappear.

“Sorry, thought Mr. Jones had the right to know the ins and outs of our relationship”

“Hmm... maybe other day, we should ask him for dinner first” Y/N said winking at him playfully and leaning down to grab her bad “now, how about we order a pizza and try the new face mask I bought, I could even paint our nails, I’ll let you apply the glittery nail polish on mine if you want”

“Oh, that’d be nice, I-“ he started out completely in shock she knew what he’d like to do.

“Peter told me” she informed him with a sheepish smile and he shook his head with a chuckle.

“I’m so going to murder him, you two have to stop talking about me” Raul didn’t mean it at all, he couldn’t be happier that she got along so well with his family “I don’t want him telling you all my secrets”

“Oh, so I wasn’t supposed to see all your baby pics and first photoshoot as a teen looking all cute with braces? I mean, Peter gave me the album, I thought we could look through it tonight together”

“You have to be kidding me, give me it”

“No! You’re not going to let me see it!”

“Of course! Why would I let you see any of those horrid pictures?!”

“Well” Y/N said holding her bad closer to her chest “you’d have to catch me first” and with that she bolted towards his room as he followed her quickly, only to pick her up and toss her on the bed, climbing on top of her in a matter of seconds, her stuff long forgotten on the floor somewhere in the apartment.

“How old are you? Five?” he chuckled a little out of breath

“You chased after me, you’re not much better, sir”

“I was trying to protect my dignity”

“What dignity?”

“Shut up” he said laughing.

“Make me”

“Don’t tease me”

“I’d never do th-“ she was cut off by his lips meeting hers a bit more urgently than before, their tongues soon meeting, only to caress each other as her hands took purchase of his curls. And Raul’s never been more thankful for sneaking his hoodie in her closet.

                                                     -*-

*Please reblog or like this post if you liked it so I’ll know.

*I’m sorry if there are any spelling mistakes.

*Please do not repost this without giving me the credit, this is a completely original piece and I do not give permission to copy this!

*Hope you guys enjoyed it!

*xoxo

From the corner of his eye, he saw Keith raise a brow from the sofa, humming softly before answering him. "No, i didn't. I don't remember anything like that on our fridge, are you sure you didn't eat it already?" He gasped dramatically, turning around with a hand above his heart, feigning hurt -which wasn't difficult because he was exhausted and now disappointed- as he rose his finger to point at Keith.

"How can you say that!? I would know if i ate something so delicious. I left it on the top right, like, three days ago, i was waiting for a hellish day like today to eat it so i would feel better, and now it's gone." He pouted, crossing his arms as his boyfriend looked at him with an amused expression, which, rude.

"Sorry Lance, but i really don't know what happened to it, maybe we threw it out without noticing? There was a lot of trash and spoiled food that we had to take care of  two days ago, right? Maybe we didn't see it?" It was a possibility. They discovered, as soon as they began living together, that they were horrible at managing their food.

Sometimes they bought too much and it ended up spoiled, or they forgot it was there and didn't eat it, passing the due date and having to ponder if it was still fit for human consumption when they finally found it. (It wasn't.)

Other times, they bought ingredients to make dinner themselves, but would miscalculate the amount, and the veggies and fruit would go bad, leaving a stench that wasn't at all pleasant and a whole lot of mold no one wanted to clean but had to. And then there were the times when they bought too little, and ate so much junk food the leftovers piled inside the fridge and became a mishmash of burger and fries that looked to have gained sentience.

Which was what happened two days ago. So maybe the cake had been caught in the crossfire and ended in the trashcan. The mere thought just made him want to weep.

It had looked so good, with such a shiny glaze, and the sponge cake seemed really fluffy too....Ugh, he cursed his back luck.

"I'm sorry about your cake, Lance. Wanna tell me about your day?" Keith laid down on the couch and opened his arms, and he immediately threw himself at him, knowing his boyfriend wouldn't even flinch, since he was ripped, and also a personal trainer at the local gym.

He took a second to feel Keith's arms around him, the warmth of his body and the smell of his shampoo, the dips and creases of his chest and the toned muscles that cradled him and made him feel safe. " Ugh, it's been the worst. So, i was just going around doing my thing, you know? Putting things on shelves like normal, when this douche of a dude comes out of nowhere and begins harassing me-" He babbled and seethed and didn't stop speaking for a long, long while.

But Keith never interrupted unless it was to ask a question in concern or add his own input about the absolutely annoying and unbelievable people in Lance's line of work.

Retail.

By the time he finished his tale, he was breathing hard, hands clenched on Keith's sweater as he struggled not to cry. He hated his job, and the people there -except Hunk, Hunk was an angel sent by god to keep him sane- but he didn't have a choice until he saved enough money to pay for the damages done to his car in a small accident a few months ago.

And then he still had to pay for his degree after, he owed a lot of money still.

Working in retail was actually just a temporary job, he was waiting to finally work on what he really loved, the career he had worked hard for and studied to get a degree on.

Teaching.

He wanted to teach children, he'd always been good with them, and it had been his dream since he could remember, he'd drained himself dry to achieve that dream, and it was about to become a reality.

He had a place already, a small school managed by Mrs.Allura, who had told him that when Coran -one of the oldest teachers there- retired, Lance would take his place and finally make his title of teacher official. But until then, he had to keep paying bills and repairs and what not, so what had he done? Look for a temporary job to keep them afloat while he got his dream job.

And it was killing him.

Thank god it was only another month.

He didn't think he'd been able to take much more of that.

"You know you could always leave that job, right? I don't mind paying for things until Allura finally employs you, she's a friend- well, more like a sister, really- and we know she won't go back on her word." He knew, of course he knew. Keith's brother, Shiro, and his husband, Adam, were friends with Allura since high school, and that, by default, made Keith her friend, and therefore Lance, too.

But Lance was stubborn and headstrong, and damned prideful while he was at it too. He felt like a leech if he wasn't contributing to keeping their household afloat, it always made him feel guilty and inadequate, like he wasn't enough for Keith, like he deserved better.

"Hey, c'mon now, stop thinking so much. It was only a suggestion, you don't have to do it if you don't want to. I only want you to be happy." Lance only grumbled in response, burrowing his head on the crook of Keith's neck, curling up like a child and not caring at all that he sounded whiny.

"A chocolate cake would've made me happy..." He whispered, and felt Keith sigh as he ran his fingers through his hair, his other hand rubbing circles on his back and making him sleepy.

"I think it's time to go sleep, Lance. You have an early shift tomorrow, don't you?" He groaned and refused to get up, but his boyfriend already knew about his bad habits and picked him up effortlessly, walking to their bed and laying him down softly before dropping a chaste kiss to his lips, then leaving to brush his teeth.

Lance, meanwhile, giggled like a love-struck teenager, rolled around like a burrito, and stopped right at the edge with his arms dangling over the side of the mattress, head tilted to the left as his eyes bore on the trashcan right by Keith's desk.

He focused intently and thought he saw red, and as he narrowed his eyes and squinted, he could read the word ' Olkar-' . He gasped and got up, running to dig into the trashcan, taking out the purple-red envelope that said 'Okarion Patisserie', the exact same one that he'd bought that chocolate cake from.

So Keith had lied to him. He had eaten his cake. Wow, talk about honesty.

He wasn't even mad anymore, just...kind of sad? Disappointed maybe? It wasn't a big deal, not anymore since Keith had soothed his worries and listened to his ranting, which made him feel better. Keith's affectionate touches, comforting words and his silent support always did that to him.

But that had been a really nice cake.

A bit of revenge was in order.

McClain style.

--

The next day, as Keith left for work, Lance -who still had a few hours before he himself had to go- went out to buy some pie, the apple one that he knew his boyfriend liked so much. And just because he was already there, he took some things their fridge was missing, humming a little tune all the way, thinking about how many photos he was gonna snap that same evening.

It was going to be hilarious.

He got home and dumped the things on their respective places, and, because he was so thorough with his pranks, he took the bottle of chilly sauce out of the bag, opened the apple pie, and spilled a few drops on the filling before closing it again, then put the envelope back together like nothing had happened.

And just to be sure it worked, he left a sweet note telling Keith it was for him, even signing it with a kiss and a few hearts.

Feeling lighter and with a smirk blooming on his face, Lance left for work, giddy and eager for his shift to end so he could laugh at Keith, and then berate him for lying and ask for kisses in compensation....

As soon as his lips weren't on fire anymore, of course.

--

Six hours later, and Lance was ready to call it a day. He quickly dressed himself and said good-bye to Hunk -who left with his girlfriend- running towards the bus stop so he was sure he didn't miss it, glancing longingly at the store on the far end of the street, the one that was now closed because of repairs and wouldn't open until a few months down the line.

'Adios, my sweet cake, it's sad that i never got to taste you.' He bemoaned, brushing away an invisible tear just as the bus arrived, going to take him home to where his boyfriend would probably be screaming to the high heavens, his mouth on fire with no way to make it stop, since he couldn't drink milk.

'Just cold water for you, mister liar.' He chuckled to himself, knowing for a fact that Keith could take spicy without trouble, but it would still annoy him to no end, leaving him grumbling and pouting until Lance smoothed out his frown with a few kisses here and there.

Ah, he couldn't wait.

--

As soon as he got home and caught sight of Keith, slumped on the floor cradling his stomach while he groaned, he reassessed his previous thought; he could definitely wait.

He threw his bag unceremoniously to the floor, closing the door with his foot and running towards his boyfriend, cradling his sweaty face in his hands as he worriedly asked him what was wrong.

"I dunno....i think it's- ugh- someting i ate." Lance brushed his bangs away and tried to feel for a fever, but found nothing, and he seemed coherent and alert, just in pain, which was a relief.

"Babe, what did you eat? Did it smell bad? Was it past its due date-?" keith shook his head, pushing his hands harder against his stomach, one of them going to cover his mouth as he coughed a little. Lance was beginning to panic.

"No- just...that apple pie -Lance froze- you bought for me, did you check the label for dairy?" Lance nodded fervently, relieved, he always checked the labels on everything, it was second nature to him now. Keith was lactose intolerant, and it always made him feel like shit when he accidentally ate some, nothing that wouldn't go away the next day but- not pretty, he didn't like it when Keith suffered.

"Yeah, it didn't have any so ..." He held Keith's arms and led him to the couch.

"Ugh, my mouth burns.......i- is that...normal?" Lance stopped short, the gears inside his brain turning as he caught up to one small tiny detail; the chilly sauce. He wanted to laugh to himself, saying it was impossible, that it made no sense a chilly sauce would have lactose or anything but- but he had to check, had to make sure. "Wait here just a sec." He fled through their house and opened the drawer in the kitchen, taking out the bottle and reading the too small letters-

'Allergens notice: Contains milk.' And there it was, Lance's mistake. He was always so careful, so thorough, but he'd been too excited to exact a petty revenge on his boyfriend, and now he felt like shit because of him, with an added burn to boot. He threw the bottle inside the bin, and ran all the way to the lounge, crouching before Keith, ready to fess up.

"I'm sorry- i didn't meant to- i didn't check and- you know i always check-" Keith put a hand on his mouth, effectively shutting him up.

"Slowly, Lance, i can't understand a word you're -ugh- saying." He took a deep breath, gulping down the nausea rising in his throat, looking up into Keith's pained face and tearing up when he noticed just how pale and sick he looked.

"I- i found the wrapping of- of the cake i bought in our room and- and i was so mad because i wanted it so much but- but i was angrier at the fact that you lied to me so- so i...i wanted to get back at you." Keith groaned and doubled over, and Lance nearly fell in his haste to hold him in between his arms, rubbing his back in what he hoped were comforting motions.

"So- so you-what? Gave me milk as- as revenge?" Horrified that Keith would think he would ever do something like that to him on purpose, the tears that had been gathering in the corners of his eyes finally fell, a small steady stream down his cheeks.

"Wh- no! I would never-!" His breath hitched, and he struggled to talk through his hiccups. "I bought t-the pie you love so much a-and put some chilly s-sauce inside as a- a prank." He sniffed, trying to be silent, hoping that Keith would continue looking away. He hated crying, but he hated even more when someone saw him do it, it made him feel...weak.

"I just w-wanted a little p-payback but i f-forgot to check the label o-of the sauce....I-I'm sorry Keith..." His boyfriend finally looked up, his bout of nausea -or maybe cramps- seemingly over. He let out a sigh of relief, but his calm expression faded rapidly as he looked up at Lance, and then his face turned pained, eyes wide and slightly panicked.

"Hey, hey, c'mon  it's fine, don't cry. You know i won't die from this. It'll suck, yeah, but by tomorrow night i will be right as rain." Keith opened his arms in invitation and, although he felt guilty and undeserving of affection right now, his body knew what he wanted before his mind catched up to his thoughts, and he was throwing himself at his boyfriend, curling with him on the couch as he sniffed pathetically.

"I'm so sorry...you know i would never do this to you on purpose....i hate it when you are hurt." He felt the steady rise and fall of the other's chest, the warmth of his arms around his body, holding him tight, their legs curling together as Keith sought closeness, cuddling being something that made him feel better when he was sick.

"I know, i'm sorry too. I didn't mean it, i know you would never do something like that, and i'm...sorry about your cake, too. I was half asleep that day after classes, finished too late and was about to faint with both hunger and exhaustion. I just...opened the fridge and ate the first thing i got my hands on...i didn't even notice it was your cake until i had already finished." Lance shook his head, muttering that he didn't care about that as much as the fact that he'd lied to him about it, and, even then, he wasn't that mad about it.

He loved Keith, he wasn't about to have a fight for something as silly as food, it just so happened that that day had been a very bad one for him, and his only solace had been that small piece of heaven he had stored for emergencies.

"S'okay, was silly anyways, i was just really ticked off that day, it wasn't your fault. We share everything, i've eaten things that were yours too, sometimes, and you've never berated me for it." Keith hummed in acknowledgment, the vibrations calming his nerves and making him relax bit by bit until he was sure he was going to fall asleep right then and there.

He always said that the most comfortable place in the whole world was between Keith's arms.

He still stood by that.

"Yeah, well, i'm working on what i like, and i don't get stressed as much as you do. I know how bad your job can get, and how you're doing your best until Allura hires you officially, so i don't mind indulging you sometimes, as long as you don't make a habit out of it." He chuckled, rubbing his forehead against Keith's chest, inhaling the scent of his soap and feeling the beating of his heart, like a lullaby soothing him to sleep.

"I don't know what i did to deserve you." He said, cuddling closer against Keith.

"You were pretty persistent, that's what." He pretended to be offended, then sighed in content when Keith nuzzled against the crook of his neck, his breath ghosting over his ear and sending a shiver down his spine. "Lance..." The whisper of his name made warmth travel down the length of his body, and a shaky suspire left him before he could help it, his hands running over the expanse of Keith's back as the other leaned closer and then-

"You're going to want to move, i have to go to the bathroom like- now." Lance somersaulted over the side of the couch, watching with grief as Keith ran towards the bathroom, where he would most likely spend the rest of the night. He crawled over to the door with a pillow and a blanket, and curled into a ball as he waited for his boyfriend to come out, even if he had to wait till morning with him.

This had been his fault, after all, so he would take care of him and make sure Keith had all he needed and was as comfortable as possible until he felt better.

It was the least he could do.

--

By the time Keith stopped feeling indisposed, the sun had begun to rise, and Lance had stayed awake every minute, giving him water and medicine and supplements, blankets and soft touches and whatever he needed so he would get better.

It had been a long night, but the one who'd most suffered had been Keith, so he had no right to complain. He just carried his tired boyfriend to their bed, tucked him in like a blanket burrito, and gave him cuddles till he fell asleep, smiling softly when the crease of his brow finally disappeared and his expression smoothed out into a calm, relaxed one.

Soft breaths left Keith's lips, and, thinking he was knocked out, Lance began talking to himself, something that always helped him calm down. "I'm really sorry about this...i'm such an idiot, i shouldn't have gotten so worked up over a stupid cake or hidden it like a child...i should have just told you.." At his side, Keith turned around and nuzzled his face on Lance's chest, discarding the blankets in favour of curling against him, legs intertwined, his dark hair tickling his chin and neck.

He felt like crying again.

"I'm so stupid, you always share everything with me, i shouldn't have gotten so upset. Ugh, i feel like the worst boyfriend ever..." A faint chuckle made him freeze, and his chest shook from Keith's small laughs, his arms tightening their grip just as he leaned away, looking into his purple eyes, sleepy and half-lidded but still awake.

"Stop beating yourself over it, Lance, it was just a joke. You know i like your jokes, one of the main reasons i began dating you was because they always blew up in your face or came back to bite you in the ass, it was funny." He pretended to be outraged, his hands pushing Keith away without any real force behind the motions.

"How dare you? I thought you dated me because of my extremely good looks and astounding intelligence?" Keith raised a brow, and looked him up and down without any kind of shame whatsoever.

"Well, you definitely have the looks... -Lance lit up- ...of an idiot." He gasped, screeching like a madman.

"Okay, first of all, rude. And second of all-" His tirade was stopped by warm lips being pressed to his, and he couldn't help but melt against Keith as he hugged him close and kissed him sweetly, fiercely and full of fire like he always did. They broke away after a while, and Lance could feel his face burning, noticing that his boyfriend's cheeks were tinted a soft red that probably rivaled his, both of them breathing hard.

"Well...that's one way of shutting me up. If you wanted to kiss me so much, you only had to ask, babe." He tried to smirk, but it probably came all soft and sappy and love-sick like, an expression he had no idea how it looked like, but that Pidge -Keith's partner at the gym- always said he made when he looked at his boyfriend.

Keith smiled, dimples on the corners of his lips. "And there's the Lance i know. Stop thinking so much about it, i'm not mad, and i know you didn't do it with malice, it was just a joke gone wrong. Forget about it, and go look in the fridge, okay?" Confused, but not willing to contradict his tired boyfriend, Lance got up and walked to their fridge, opening the door and coming face to face with-

A cake.

And not just any cake, but the exact same one he'd bought.

"Keith- what-?" He left the kitchen and ran towards their bedroom, watching Keith's features soften as he crushed the pillow between his arms.

" I felt really bad about eating your cake, you know? I asked Shiro if i could get out of work a bit early, and ran to the store to buy you another. I knew the place was always packed, and that i probably wouldn't be able to get any but- they were closing that day, and i really wanted to replace the one i ate." Lance sat on the edge of the bed, running his fingers through Keith's hair, listening to him sigh and snuggle, comfortable.

"So i waited in line for two hours to buy it." Lance stopped all movement, ready for the earth to open up and swallow him whole. God, he just wasn't a bad boyfriend, he had ascended to the worst boyfriend ever, he had no redemption now. "I just...wanted to see you smile, and if a cake was what you needed to feel happy, then i didn't mind. I hate it when you're stressed." Aaand Lance was gone, dead, deceased, he didn't deserve that cake, didn't deserve to even look at it, he was trash, the worst of the worst- what did he even do-

"I still don't know what i did to deserve you." Keith hummed and looked at him, opening his arms with what he now knew -after so much time together- was an invitation to cuddle and kiss and hug, share caresses with one another until they succumbed to asleep.

"Don't be silly, you're you, and that's more than enough for me." Lance slowly crawled on the bed and wiggled around until he was between Keith's arms, enjoying the way he held him, tight without being suffocating, tender but firm.

"You're too good to me." He whispered.

"Just the right amount." Keith answered, cradling Lance closer and humming a song under his breath, a long forgotten lullaby that his mother used to sing for him. Between that and the sound of his heartbeat, Lance was out within seconds, feeling his stress and guilt ebb away, being replaced by joy and delight instead.

The next morning, when they both woke, he ate the small cake that Keith had bought, all the while with his boyfriend smiling tenderly at him from the counter.

It tasted sweet.

But Keith was sweeter.

“I haven’t told him that you came back home.” Your little brother blurted out, with a grin on his face, letting you know he is really glad that you’re actually back, his way of telling you he’d missed you. “He’s doing good. He’s working, and he went back to studying… He’s happy.” He smiled back at you, seeing how your face was no longer expressing grief or melancholy, but a pleasant smile. 

You were unsure of a lot of things, but one thing that you were certain of, he deserves all of the happiness in the world. 

“That’s nice to know.” Your attention went back to the sweater. The coldness of the night he left it to you seemed to reach your fingertips, and the warmth of the memory reached your gut, butterflies that you thought dead flew for a second. “You should give it back to him.” You added, lifting your head up to look at him. 

“You sure?” Even if he was the youngest, he always treated you in such a delicate manner, it made you softer, you had missed him. 

“Yeah, it’s been long enough.” You chuckled as you said it, and he nodded along. You hadn’t been home in years, hadn’t seen him in two of those. 

“I’m meeting him in a bit, I can give it to him then.” You nod, and he mouths a soft okey before leaving the room. 

You had a moment, for the first time since you had arrived back home, where you were alone. No music, no noise, no one else with you. 

You left so you could go to college, that was your excuse. Then he broke up with you, the distance only exposed other problems, in both of you. When you did break up, he told you that he still loved you, but it wasn’t enough. 

The echo of his words still with you, it isn’t enough, am i not enough? 

The sweetness of his voice shocked with his broken tone, tears fell from his eyes when he said goodbye. That was the last weekend you came down, and you had been avoiding coming back ever since. 

The walls of your room were empty, the new coat of paint now dry, half full boxes of clothes and shoes and memorabilia were scattered around the floor, the bed half done, the cover still having to be put. It seemed like a new beginning, a new chance for yourself. 

Not a lot of people knew you were back. Dustin knew, of course. It had been funny seeing him finally drive, his hands still a bit insecure behind the wheel, but he looked so happy being able to pick his sister from the airport, it had made you beam with happiness when you saw him.

And you had called Eddie as soon as you woke up today. He was ecstatic, begging you to come to a party tonight, telling you that he’d come pick you up as soon as his shift at the garage was done. You knew he’d missed you, even if he’d come often to the city, and vent over everything he had going on. Avoiding to bring him up, even if you did. 

So you laid down on your floor, staring at the same ceiling you did as you grew up in that same house. 

Before you were aware of what you were doing, or why, a pen rested on your hand, scribbling down on a piece of paper. 

Hey, I’m sorry it took this long to give it back, guess I wasn’t ready to let you go. Maybe I’ll never be. I hope you’re happy, and that you have everything you deserve. I’m also sorry if it stinks of me, it has been with me for a while now. Bye. 

PS. Don’t be a stranger. I’m here if you need me. 

You signed it, and folded it one too many times before dropping it inside the little bag that had his sweater in it, the green clashing with the yellow fabric. 

Dustin grabbed it before he left, you smiled when you heard that his car sounded the same. 

-

Loud music, sweaty people and colorful lights. 

Your drink was empty, it had been for a while.

Eddie smiled while he danced and took a sip of his drink, happy that you’re finally back, his head swinging back and forth. His attention was split, between you and an unknown blonde girl that was on the bar. You smiled when you caught her staring. 

“You’ve got a fan Edds.” You chuckled as you teased him. Raising your voice so he could hear you. 

“Who?” 

“The blonde”

“I don’t think that’ll work.” He laughed, his shyness coming in as it always did when the attention was on him. 

“I think it will if you actually go talk to her… buy her a drink?” You shake your head in her direction, he knows you’re actually telling him it’s okay, you can go, i’m okay. 

“Sure?” 

“Yeah, I’ll go to the other bar and get a drink, wait for you there.” He nodded, and you smiled as you saw him blush. 

He looked back at her, he rubbed his chin in a nervous manner, before actually walking over to her. You laughed at him, smiling deeply seeing your friend acting the same he always had. 

As you shook your head to yourself, stifling another laugh you left him on his own, Eddie flirted better when you weren’t around anyway. You started walking to the other bar area, the only problem, you had to find your way through the dance floor before you could reach it. You looked at the people there, all of them dancing mindlessly, some couples that had been formed, kissing or dancing together -it always made you smile, seeing people loving each other, publicly, without fear- and some doing what you were doing, looking around while downing their drink. 

You were halfway through, when you saw him. 

Everything else became fuzzy, the only clear image in your vision was him, wearing the yellow sweater. 

Steve saw you too. 

And time seemed to stop for a moment, and before it started again, there was a few seconds of slow motion. His hair flicking to the beat of the music, as his lips curved upwards at the sight of you, his eyes softening. He’d missed seeing you. He looks the same he did. You thought, though taller, broader, happier. 

Before you knew it, you were face to face. 

You didn’t say anything. You just looked at each other. Years of not seeing him, of avoiding him, it all didn’t matter now. His smile had the same effect on you as it always had, melting you on the spot. He broke the distance, and his arms wrapped around your waist, pulling you in close for a hug, your arms laying behind his neck, your fingers stroking his hair. 

I miss you. 

“Hi.” Steve whispered into your ear. An excited but yet calm tone could be heard in his tone. 

“Hi.” You whispered back, holding on to him for a second longer before pulling back. 

“Dustin told me you came back.” He raised his voice now that your head was no longer close to him. “I didn’t think I’d see you today.”

“I can tell.” You joked, as you grabbed his sweater, and you saw him chuckle in response. 

“D’you wanna go out? And talk?” He pointed at where the exit was. Of course you wanted to, you almost felt like you needed to. Hear his voice for once, not just remember it. 

As soon as you nodded, he started to head out, grabbing your hand as he passed in front of you. The same tingling feeling comes back to you, as if it was the first time you went on a date with him. The excited nervousness, the hopefulness, the wishing. 

Cold air hitted your chest, even if it was an unseasonably warm night, you blamed the alcohol because anything else would be too confusing, and you were really trying to not get too much into your head. Not now, when he was standing against the wall and his pretty brown eyes were fixed deep into yours. 

“So, how have you been?” He broke the silence, and the moment of admiration between the both of you. 

“Good.” You smile shyly to yourself. “I’ve been good.” 

“How did the big city treat you?” 

“Chicago is… Interesting.” You chuckled, as you scratched your forehead. He knew that was your anxious tick, the way you had when you had too many thoughts swimming around inside your mind. “Uh… You’d hate deep dish pizza.” 

He laughed, and the little butterfly hidden in your stomach came alive again. Warmness and goosebumps on your skin. 

“I did hate it.” He recalls, looking up for a moment, the street lights shining on him. He looks like a statue, you thought, unaware of how pretty he is.

“When did you try it?” 

“I was waiting for one of your classes to end, got hungry and saw a little place that was selling them, disgusting.” He shook his head in a funny manner, it made you giggle, so he did it again, wanting to hear you again. 

“I ended up liking it, y’know.” 

“Of course you did.” He teased, a finger poking your cheek, your face leaning into his touch. 

“You get used to it.” You shrugged, your hand reaching for your purse, searching for the pack of Marlboros you knew you had. 

“You’re good at that.” He grinned as his eyes became softer, he couldn’t stop looking you up and down. “You’re good at everything.”

“‘M not.” You laughed as you took a cigarette out, placing it between your lips. “I still can’t cook as good as you can.” 

“You miss my cooking?” He raised his eyebrows as he asked, a cheeky grin on his lips. 

“I dream about those meatballs you made.” You confessed, trying to hide your truthfulness with a giggle, that he saw through. His head tilted back for a moment, as his Adam's apple moved as he sifted a laugh. 

“D’you remember when I tried to teach you how to make Napolitanian pizza from scratch?” You started to laugh at the memory, failing to light your cigarette, hiding your face on the palm of your hand. 

His heart started to beat again, louder, stronger, faster. If you weren’t too busy trying to quiet yours down, you’d hear it.  

“God… I ended up covered in flour.” 

“Your hair was all white.” His tone softented, as did his eyes. His body seemed to be closer to yours, itching for contact. “I missed that laugh.” He finally confessed, even if the thought had been on his mind since he first heard it that night. 

“You did?” 

“Yeah, I missed you too.” 

It happened then. The wave of nervousness, relieved in an instance. 

He missed me. Hemissed me. Hemissedme. 

The excitement that came with it, the realisation that what you felt in some way was reciprocated. And that the complicated feelings were felt by the both of you. 

“Really?” Your voice was full of hope, your eyes shining bright at him. 

“Yeah.” He was blushing now, as he smiled. A wide upside down grin that made your stomach flutter. “Did you?”

“Of course I did.” 

How could you not? He has been the best person that has ever stood by you. Even if things had ended, you could only remember the good times, the fun times, the soft ones. How loved he made you feel every single day. How wanted. How cared for. 

“When we broke things off…” You started to rumble, as smoke escaped through your lips, finally having ignited the cig. “It wasn’t because I didn’t love you anymore.” 

“I know.” He muttered, his tone letting it known that he had a knot in his throat. “I still loved you.” 

“Yeah.” You looked up at him, your hand reaching for his, a needed familiar contact came back. “I needed to be okay.”

“Are you?” You knew he was worried about your answer, in a weird way, Steve never had stopped caring about you. And neither had you. 

“I am.” You nodded, the curve your lips made made him know that you couldn’t be lying. “I don’t have panic attacks every night, I’m fine being on my own. Honestly.” 

“I believe you.” His hand squeezed yours, the soft touch telling you he trusted you, implicitly. You felt yourself falling back into him. “And I’m proud of you, really.” 

“I’m proud of you too.” You finally took a step closer to him, your legs touching and a love sick grin on both of your faces. “Dustin told me you’re studying.” 

“Yeah well… I finally decided, I guess…” 

Even if your attention was on nothing else but him, when the doors opened and people started to come back to the street, smelling of alcohol, smoke and sweat. A chattering invaded the quiet street, and your focus changed. 

“Shit.” Your eyes were scanning the multitude, trying to find Eddie, or the blonde girl, or any of her friends. 

“What?” Steve’s eyebrow furrowed again, not really knowing why the swarm of people had made your demeanor change. Your hand letting his go, your body taking a step back. 

“I came with Edds… Do you see him?” 

“Oh, you’re with him?” You scoffed at the question, rolling your eyes lightheartedly, as you shook your head no. Steve nodded as the smallest grin appeared. A relief appeared in his face, and you chuckled at his question and reaction. 

“He’s a friend.” You still were trying to find him, people kept passing you by, taller, shorter and drunker. “D’you see him?” 

“No.” 

Steve left his hand on your shoulder, asking for your attention, knowing that you were getting into your head, and you were worrying too much too soon. And he also knew that once you felt his touch, your shoulders would relax and drop. Your mind stopped spinning. 

“D’you remember where he parked?” As soon as he speaks you feel grounded. You nodded, and he replicated the movement. “We’ll wait for him there then, come on.” 

You started walking, comfortable silence was one of your favourite things. Just knowing that he was there made you feel better, glancing at him from time to time, catching him staring at you everytime you did so. Making your lips curve everytime you catch him. 

The van wasn’t there. 

“Fuck.” 

“He left?” His tone was a bit agressive now, not at you, if anything he just was protective, so in consequence he seemed pissed that he had left you stranded. Alone. 

“I’m guessing he got lucky with the blonde.” You chuckled out of nervousness. Your hand playing with your hair, placing a strand of it behind your ear, trying to look everywhere but him. “S’fine, I’ll just call a taxi and wake Dustin up.”

“Shut up.” He scoffed, his arms crossing in front of his chest, looking down at you, a look of decision in his eyes. There was no way you were going home alone. “I’ll drive you, c’mon.” 

“I don’t have my keys.” You mumbled. “Dustin has mine. I was supposed to sleep over.”

“Then you’ll sleep over. Let’s go.” His hand reached out, an invitation you weren’t sure you should take, but do anyway. 

-

The car ride had been filled by music, and soft touches. Loving stares, and nervous chuckles. 

It really did feel like old times. 

It didn’t help that his house smelled the same, and time seemed to not move in the Harrington household. 

The only difference was the most noticeable of them all. All of the family pictures had been put down. 

“You changed it up.” You whispered as soon as you walked in, seeing the bare walls, were paint was darker where frames used to be. 

“They don’t live here anymore. So…” You knew he wanted to tell you about it, just as much as you knew he didn’t want to talk about it now, so you just nodded, and he understood what you knew. Words weren’t even necessary. 

“Who does?” You changed the topic, slightly, once you saw a jacket that wasn’t his hanged on the wall. 

“Robin.” He smiled, his face relaxing and becoming brighter. “Her parents didn’t really get the whole… uh… liking girls things.”

“Right, how is she?” You had wanted to reach out to her, but you weren’t sure if she’d wanted to hear from you, you worried, and Steve’s voice echoed in your head you worry too much.

“She missed you.” He confessed with a smile, starting to climb up the stairs, finding his way to his bedroom, you followed him closely. “We all did, I guess.” 

His head hung low for a second, remorse in his voice. Looking back at you for a moment before he turned on his bedroom light, his skin glistened under the moonlight that sneaked through his window. You smiled, seeing him in this light again, with the same background that you had becomed so familiar with once before. 

His walls where still the same colour, and bedsheets were still stripped. It smelled and felt the same as it had always done, and for a moment -however brief- you were back in time. 

You were eighteen again, and you were sneaking into his room for the first time again. 

The orangy bedside table filled the room again, and Steve had his boyish grin that had made you fall in love with him all those years ago. He looked at you, fondly, lovingly, melancholically, as you looked around, noticing the new photos on the wall. 

“Most of them are from Jonathan, some of them are your brother’s” You chuckled as you carefully looked at all of them, seeing what he had been up to. 

Him working at Family Video with Robin, him with his hands on his hips, apron on and full of flour with a rag over his left shoulder. Him asleep on the back of Eddie’s van. 

And your favourite one, Steve laing on your bed, looking straight through the camera, a smile that he was hiding behind his arm still evident by the way his face looks, barely woken up. You took that one, when he came to visit you, before you ended things. 

“You looked really beautiful.” You whisper, a tone of sadness could be noted on your voice. But your body relaxed when you felt him stepping closer to yours. 

“I don’t anymore?” He halved joked, the same lovesick look all over his face, his hair falling messily now that he had took his sweatshirt, hanging it back to you. A gesture that said you’re always cold before sleeping, you can wear it.

“Thanks.” You mutter before taking it, your body feeling his warmth through that piece of clothing. “You do. You always are.” 

He stood there for a second, and you could tell he wanted to say something he didn’t quite have the courage to do so. 

“What?” 

“Nothing.” He answered, his eyebrows furrowed and his lips pressed. You scoffed as you shook your head. He knew that you were saying don’t lie, i know you better than anyone. “Think I’m still drunk.” 

“Maybe.” You admit with a half laugh, as you feel the weight of the alcohol that you did drink, and how it had swapped for tiredness not that the clock was closer to four. “You still have something in your mind.” 

“Yeah.” He stepped closer to you. His voice was softer, quieter, sweeter. And his eyes couldn’t stop looking at yours. Well, that might have been a lie, he did look at your lips once or twice. His hand reached for yours, nervous that you might pull away. But you never did. You never could. “I’m sorry.” 

“What for?” You squeezed his hand tighter, wanting that gesture to make his frown disappear, but you only see his anxiousness shine for a second. 

“I don’t know. Nothing? Everything?” 

“You’re not making that much sense, Stevie.” It had slipped out, the old nickname. You felt a bit embarrassed until you saw him smile. A true deep fond smile. 

“I know, honey.” His didn’t, he chose to say it. The dopiest grin that made your heart skip a beat came back, while his fingers played with yours. You could feel the warmness of your cheeks staying there. “I just… I meant everything I said, when we were together.” 

“What-?” 

He interrupted you, too iger to let you know what he had been thinking since he saw you through the club lights and the sea of drunk people. 

“I told you, you were the one I love. It hasn’t changed. I’ve tried, believe me. I tried to stop loving you, and move on, and be with someone else, anyone, but they never came close to you. Nobody knows me like you do, nobody can read me like you do, and I don’t think I can love anyone else like I have loved you.” 

With every word, with every breath your body came closer to his, excitement and electricity growing with every word that reached your ears, you couldn’t really believe that it was really happening. 

And you weren’t conscious about what you were doing before you did. You just knew that your right hand was tangled with his, and that your left one was cupping his cheek, looking fondly at his eyes before closing the distance between your lips. 

They were as soft as you remembered. And he still tastes the same as he did. 

You enjoyed it, for as long as you could, your heart beating as one, as your breathing synchronized, and his neediness became yours. Your kiss, this gesture, was enough, more than words could even say. 

“I haven’t stopped.” Your voice comes out lower, softer, quieter than you intended to. Your forehead pressed to his. Your eyes still closed, enjoying the way your breathing was mixing with his. 

“Thank god.” He giggled as he pulled you close once again. 

The second kiss was longer than the first one, but it still made your heart flutter, and your skin warming up in familiar desire. His free hand found his way to your waist, holding you closely, afraid that if he opens his eyes you might disappear. 

“We can talk about us, tomorrow.” 

“Yeah.” 

You buried his head on his chest, as he pushed you closer to him. A warm hug that you didn’t want to see the end of, a closeness that you’d missed, and that you hoped you didn’t have to miss again. 

The promise that tomorrow you’d wake up next to him again, and his warmth wrapping you up under the sheets let you actually rest for once.

-

if you enjoyed it please leave a comment or reblog. i promise it makes a huge difference <3

Guilt consumed you. 

It was worse, you had to lie to Wayne, you had to lie to the only person that knew him as much as you did, that cared for him as much as you did. 

You buried an empty coffin a couple of weeks ago. 

And all you had was an old shirt of his, and his guitar pick necklace you had once gifted him. 

Your hands closed around it, one last tear falling down as you did so. I miss you, i’m sorry were the only thoughts running through your mind. 

After a long time of just thinking, your eyes vacant and your thoughts going a bit too fast. As soon as Robin came to check on you once again, she knew where you were headed off to. 

The mix he had made you was still in your car, playing his music as if he was next to you. If you concentrated enough, you could still hear him sing them, in his usual chaotic goofy voice and tone he always used to get you to laugh, though if he was being sirius or was in his own little world he actually had a beautiful voice, an angelical one if you were the one listening. 

A weird combination of crying and laughter was now consuming you, as you finally parked your car in the same spot you had for the last few weeks. 

It was a weird feeling, you became more yourself the closer you walked to his grave, the closer you came to seeing his name carved in stone, the fuller you felt, as if he was walking beside you. 

The wind rustled in the leaves, as birds stopped singing, the sun still shining, your skin soaking it in, your puffy eyes squinting harder because of it. 

It was a very scenic moment, you thought as you sat down in front of the carved stone. 

“Hey Moon.” You whispered with a heavy heart. The stinging coming back to the back of your head as you looked at the faded graffiti you had cleaned yesterday. “I brought you a bit of music, I thought you might like it.” You fumbled through your bag, trying to find the little portable cassette player you had saved up for, that he had drawn in the back of with one of his markers. EM was here could still be seen in a faint white ink. “I finally got you the Metallica cassette you wanted.” You half smiled, trying not to break down again. 

The first guitar notes from the song battery filled the air, you let your body hit the ground right as the bass started, your feet stomping at the melody. 

“You’d love to play the guitar solo of this one.” You teased him, mumbling to the sky, your eyes closed, your body relaxing a bit more. 

The little portable player was starting to make that funny noise it had been making for the last couple of days, that dirty interference that made you angry every time, interrupting your time, it only infuriated you more now that you were here, trying to be close to him once more. Your arm reached to it, your eyes yet unopened, spanking it a bit, hopeful that it would go away. 

It didn’t. 

It started going in and out of focus, as if something was tampering with it, or water had crawled in, making the switch to the next song sound as if it was coming from deep underwater, as if a wave had just engulfed the speaker. 

“Fuck’s sake.” You complained through gritted teeth, grabbing it and holding it up, wiggling it a bit. As you did, the muffled sound went away, and the thing that should not be started playing. 

You lowered the volume, and let the speaker sit next to your ear, letting it sing only for you. 

It didn’t give you any trouble for a while, until it started acting up again. This time, the volume went up and down. At first you thought it was random, until you started paying attention. It seemed like a message, and grief invaded you enough to make you believe impossible things. 

Your shaking hands grabbed it, pulling it a top of your lap, looking back at where his name was carved before whispering “Don’t fuck with me” as you played the backwards button. Letting the song start from the beginning once again. “I swear to god Eddie if you’re fucking with me I’ll kill you again.” You spat as you mumbled angrily at the air, hoping to be right. 

To your astonished surprise, it seemed to work. 

The volume went up, as if it was a code, as if he was screaming. If you were honest, you could feel him screaming and yelling the lyrics in that chaotic voice you learned to love and miss. 

The very first word of the song spiked up messenger, it felt obvious enough, though it could just be a dumb coincidence. lurking beneath the sea made the volume go up, lowering immediately after it. You kept listening, writing it on the sketch pad you always carried in your bag. 

Once the song ended, the previous blank paper had sparesed lyrics over it. 

It read a confusing mess that you had to bring to Dustin as soon as possible. You recited it over and over again while you were speeding on the car. 

The motor of your car was louder with every gear shift you made, the little orange arrow in your speedometer kept rising, but you payed it no mind. In a similar manner, you didn’t care if your car skidded anytime you made a left turn, the only thing in your mind where the little words you had heard louder than the others. 

You didn’t care if your car blocked his driveway, or if the keys were still in the ignition. The bag on your left shoulder felt havier now that it was guarding the little instrument that felt magic. You hands where still shaking and you could stop fidgeting with his necklace, moving it one swipe left and two right as you made your way to Dustin’s front door, not sure what to say, not sure what to do. You were now anxiously looking down at your feet, and the way they moved through the cobblestone, the bumps that they left on your feet. 

You gathered enough courage to bang on his door. 

But he was taking a bit too long. 

Bang

He still hadn’t come down stairs. 

Bang Bang Bang Bang

“Jesus what?” He finally opened the door, the usual annoyed look on his face disappearing once he the way your lips were pressed together. 

“Upstairs, now. Code red.”

-

“Can you read it again?” Dustin asked, a pen in his own hand. 

“Messenger. Lurking beneath the sea. Forbidden site. Shadows. Underground. Fallen city, living death.” You looked at him, sharing a deep breath. “Then it repeats, Lurking beneath the sea, and ends with not dead”

Dustin stood up, pacing around his room while his hands fidgeted with the pen he had. 

“And you’re sure it worked normally before you arrived at the grave?” He inquired, his words pausing between them as he usually did when he was trying to figure out something. 

“Look I know it sounds stupid, but… I… It can’t be a coincidence.” He acknowledged just how hopeful and defeated you were, and he gifted you a smile. 

“I wanna believe it too, I just, can I hear it now?” You nodded, while you took the little player out of the bag and played the song again. It sounded crystal clear, no interference, no change in volume. “And it changed volume once you were…” 

“Yeah, I told you.” 

“We should go there, I’ll ask the others to join us there.” He grabbed the talkie while he handed you the phone, letting you call into family video, the number already dialed up. 

“Family Video this is Steve how may I help you today?” He sounded as bored as he always was, you could tell he was playing with the telephone chord. 

“Steve, can you take your break now?” Your voice was quieter than usual, and that pulled him in, you heard how his elbows hit the table, and the receiver was caught between his cheek and his shoulder. 

“Hey honey, everything okay?” His tone was sharper now, you felt the way he was measuring his words, he had become rather used to spreading kindness and handling you with care ever since you had come back, you had no time for that kind of nonsense right now. 

“Yeah, that’s why I’m asking you to skip work in the middle of the day.” Your words were coming out sharper and colder than you intended for them to. Irony stinging like a dagger. 

“A simple no would also work, y’know.” He answered, a bit hurt, but mostly worried. He knew the number was coming from Dustin’s house, and the only reason you had to go over his house was for one he didn’t dare to think about. 

Mostly because the last time you had barged in with Dustin into Family Video he ended diving into cold water, and with a few scars to remember those days by. 

“Can you take your break or not? We kinnda need both of you.” You were impatient now, you were speaking faster, snappier, quicker. 

“What the hell is going on?” You could physically see him holding the bridge of his nose, his eyes closed while he loudly breathed out into the receiver. 

“Steve! Please?” You were begging now, the frustration of wanting to let him know everything all at once, while trying to be careful to not say too much, the fear that someone might listen to you, the impotence of not being able to do enough, it was all enough to create tears that wouldn’t fall. 

“Breathe out.” He reminded you. He didn’t know what was going on, or why you seemed to be so aggravated, but he could tell that it was important enough, a sense of urgency clear in your voice. He took a second, looking at Robin while his eyebrows raised she called the ‘the decision look’ and she knew better than to oppose it. “Is this a code red?” He finally asked, wanting and needing you to say no, his head falling deeper once he heard your muffled yes. “Where are we meeting?” 

“Graveyard.” You answer quickly, the iron taste in the inside of your mouth becomes more prominent now that you are speaking again. “Pick Nance up.” You told him before hanging up. 

You gave a quick glance over your shoulder to check on Dustin. His words were fast paced, he started the second one while the first was still finishing in his mouth, he had no time to lose, which in a weird way, was reassuring for you. Someone cared as deeply as you did, it made you feel not that alone, seen in a way. 

You found your way downstairs, your feet feeling heavier and your chest tightening, a fast thought entered your mind, as it grew bigger so did the worry that accompanied it. What do we do if he is alive?

If Eddie really is alive, and he has been there, all by himself for the last weeks he must be pissed off. Not only that, as far as you remembered he was incredibly injured, so he could be right at death's door, a slip away from being actually gone. And if that was really the case, and he was bloodied, starving and a whisper away from death, you’d never forgive yourself if you didn’t at least just try, you had to try. 

But then again, that panic was shared. 

Dustin did not talk while you drove. He didn’t complain while you smoked one of his cigarettes that he had left on your glove compartment, he limited himself to stay still, biting his thumb as a response to the nervousness that was now deep inside his body. 

You parked where you had a mere hour ago, and the birds sang until you found your way next to his gravestone. You looked at Dustin, needing reassurance, he just nodded. Weirdly enough, you were both in a lost for words. 

You sat in silence, looking at his name with clear sandness in both of your faces, you hid a whimper, culpability making its way into your body. 

“I feel insane.” You confessed as you buried your face into the palm of your hands. Needing just a second to process it all. 

“You’re not the only one.” Dustin added, looking back as soon as he heard a familiar car pull into the secluded place you both were, he gave you a soft pad on your shoulder, his head nodding to it so you’d look. 

Steve emerged from the burgundy car, closely followed by Robin, Nancy and Jonathan.

Robin’s eyebrows were raised in concern as she ran to where you were, she wasn’t a fiscal touch person, but lately she had been giving you hugs every chance she had, and this time it was no different. It felt familiar, a sense of reassurance you desperately needed. 

“What’s going on?” She whispered into your ear, pulling away slowly, looking deep into your eyes. You waited for the other three to make their way up hill, Nancy’s knuckles were white with how much strength she was holding Jonathan’s hand. 

“He’s alive.” Is all you could bring yourself to say, before breaking down. 

You weren’t even sure why you were crying this time, maybe it just felt good to say it outloud, maybe it was just too much to manage, or maybe you just needed to relise your bottled up emotions. It didn’t matter. 

Nancy’s eyes widened, as Jonathan looked at her, not really understanding why you’d say that. Meanwhile, Steve’s arms crossed in front of his chest, he was having a hard time following you. 

“What are you talking about?” Steve’s voice was not only lower, his tone had never been as serious, not a trace or irony or sarcasm in them. 

“Dustin?” You plead for help, you didn’t think you could manage to explain it all again. Your hands were busy fidgeting with the cassette player, tracing over the speaker, wishing that it would happen again. 

“She uh… Well…” Dustin was having a hard time, the possibility that you might be right was a bit overpowering for him. 

“I came over, and played him the new record.” You gestured to the empty cassette case with the white crosses on it, Robin picked it up and looked at it closely, smiling in that that’s sweet way that she does when she finds something charming. “And uh…” 

“She says that the cassette player started going wild, the volume going up and down by itself, interference, water sound in it. But we played it again at my house and it sounds perfectly clear. And well… The words that were actually louder were like a call for help and if we look at this logically-” Steve cut the explanation that Dustin had started, a crease in the middle of his forehead. 

“That’s insane. You’re seeing things where there are none.” He exclaimed, gesturing wildly with his hands. 

“Steve…” Robin pleaded calmly, her eyes asking for him to consider the situation. 

“It’s not!” You screamed. You needed them to understand, weirder things had happened to all of you in the last couple of years, this was nothing new. “Will was able to communicate with you!” You looked at Jonathan now, trying to make him understand, trying to win him to your side of the argument. 

“Yeah but… He actually… It was his voice.” Jonathan mumbled, trying really hard to believe what you were saying, trying to see your side of the story, but the look of desperation on your face was too close to Joyce’s, and that gave him a bad feeling in his stomach. 

“He’s alive.” You repeated, looking back at the way his name was carved into the gray stone, how long it took you to be able to accept it, and how it hopefully would be destroyed, as if it never had happened. “And he’s down there, alone, injured and with no strength, do you really think he’s going to start chatting?” With every word you said your tone became higher and higher. 

“Look, there is no way he’s alive…” Steve’s voice sounded defeated as he crouched down, closer to your eye level as you were still sitting down at the floor. “We all saw him down there, bloodied and… I get that you want him back, but you shouldn’t make it our problem.” his cheeks were red, as the vein in his left temple became bigger with every breath he took. 

“Your problem?” That made you lose it, it was one thing to not believe you, it was an entirely different thing to call you crazy and accuse you of being delusional. “You were the last one out, if he is alive, it’s your fault.” It had been like poison, hearing you say such things. You knew far too well that you were hurting him, his lips were pressed against each other, his left hand holding on thigh to his arm. 

“Guys…” Robin tried to calm you both down, exchanging looks between the both of you, knowing full well this could blow everything up. Knowing that pain can be spread around faster than any disease. 

But before she could say anything else, her ears perked up, as she heard the way the wind was rustling through the trees, she was a bit too sensitive to these kinds of things, over vigilant after everything she had seen. 

“That’s way out of line…” Steve whispered, with clear guilt creeping in through his voice. “You know that if I could trade it… You know I don’t…” He was truly at a loss for words, not being sure what he could say, an extremely defeated expression rested on his face, his eyes avoiding eye contact with yours, looking at the ground, and the way the grass moved thanks to the wind. 

“Guys!” Robin screamed at all of you now, as she picked out a rusting coming deep and low from the little player you were still holding. 

Silence broke through all of you, as you looked down and started hearing the beginning of a song you hadn’t hit play for, the red light that usually shined bright when it was on was absent from it. 

“Did you–?” Dustin started to ask, you shook your head, as a hopeful smile invaded your lips. 

You went quiet, looking down at it, a guitar solo started, before you heard the tape playing backwards until the last phrase of the song was found, volume creeping louder and louder reaching out again could be heard from it, you let out a chuckle, a nervous giggle that went around the group as everyone had now experienced what had happened to you. 

“What song is that?” Nancy asked directly at you, her face still in clear shock, mouthing the first words since she got here. 

“Welcome home” You mutter, with glee in your eyes. “He is here.” You tell her, knowing that she fully believes you, by the way fear was creeping into her body. 

“That could just be a coincidence…” Steve was still cautious, not wanting to fully give in. If he did, that meant that you were right, and that he left him for dead, and he couldn’t handle the guilt that came with it. 

“Eddie!” Dustin started screaming, directly into the little player that you would not let go of, repeating his name with urgency. “Buddy, are you really there?” 

“It’s changing again.” Robin pointed out, as her fingers traced a pattern on your leg, reassuring you that this was actually happening. 

It was exactly as it had happened a few moments ago, when you were by yourself, as if water had creeped inside, mumbled and far away it sounded as the song changed to another one, before becoming crystal clear to your ears. The heavy thumping of the guitars starting again, quieting down before abruptly going up once the lyrics Twenty-one, only son, but he served us well could be heard. 

You were tearing up now, and you weren’t even capable of hiding it any longer. 

But panic came quick once you heard the next highlighted set of words. 

Finished here, greeting death, he’s yours to take away

“What’s this one called?” Jonathan asked this time, his head whipping fastly from Nancy to you. 

“Disposable Heroes.” 

-

You wasted no time. 

Dustin held on tight to his car seat every time your foot pressed the accelerator, everytime you swerved the car you could feel him holding his breath just for him to release it in a nervous manner. 

They were all gathered around Steve's kitchen table, arguing over themselves. 

You weren’t all there, the only thing going over your head was him, and the promise of actually being able to hear his voice once again. 

Your foot kept on tapping the ground, a repetitive pattern that you weren’t able to stop, your hand still playing with his necklace. The chatter of them talking was overwhelming you, they were wasting time and that was infuriating. They were arguing, and you were frozen in the spot. They kept talking and you remained quiet. 

Nancy sat down next to you, she still hadn’t said anything either. 

Her hand traveled to yours, a top of your thigh. She squeezes your hand, you knew it was her way of telling you i’m here, i’m sorry. 

“They’re wasting time.” You finally whispered, your voice hoarse, a trace of sadness in it. 

“I don’t think I can go back.” She said at the same time, a trace of guilt in hers. 

“You shouldn’t.” You reassured her, not only with your calm voice, but with the same squeeze she gave to your hand, now on her’s. You didn’t have to tell her that you planned on going alone, she had already noticed. 

“You can’t.” She finally looked at you, deep into your eyes. You noticed the way her eye twitched before shaking his head. “We barely made it out of there, there’s no way you’ll make it by yourself, and having to carry Eddie or…” 

“His body?” She snorted a laugh, trying hard not to giggle, thought the nervous laughter got you too. “This has to be one of the most insane days…” She nodded while you both laughed, catching your breath before she talked. 

“I’m watching over you, I’ll stand at the gate. That I can do.” she stood there for a second longer, her lips pursed in that shy smile she usually gave people, the ones she actually cares about. 

“Thanks Nance…” You let go of her hand, to give her a playful bump on her shoulder. She nodded as she saw you finally stand up. 

Robin looked at you with curious eyes, as she saw you finally leaving the couch. She watched in a quiet manner as she saw you grab the car keys and put them in your pocket, and how you looked around as you put your hair up in a messy ponytail, bumps caused by shaky fingers. She only put her hand around Steve’s arm, her eyes still trained on you, once she saw you pocketing the vodka bottle and the old rag to light it up. 

Steve looked at Robin first, following her eyesight until she saw you, trying to not look suspicious as the rag poked out of the pocket of your brown leather jacket. 

You knew you were being caught as soon as you heard the sudden silence. 

“Woah, woah, hey…Where do you think you’re going?” Steve pointed out, one hand on his waist as the other one gesticulated widely. Confusion and worry evident in the way he spoke, his voice coming up and down like a rollercoaster. 

“What do you think?” The frustration was clear in the way you not only looked back at him, but in the way your words sting. “You’re wasting time…” You were now defeated, your hands now buried deep into your jacket pockets, fingers playing around with what you had in them, a way of distracting yourself. 

“We’re not.” Dustin tried to make a point, though his furrowed brows read as sadness. “We need a plan, so we’re just trying to come up with one…”

“What plan? We go in, Nancy guards the door, we get him, we come back.” Your shoulders scrunch up as you simplified it all, their eyes switched from you to Nancy, who was still sat down at the sofa, a bit tenser than when you were beside her. 

“Nance, you’re not coming?” Steve inquired, his whole body turning to face her from a distance. 

“I… I can’t…” Her eyes crystalised as shock emanated from her body. 

“She doesn’t have to, I’ll be with her, we’ll keep watch. Right?” Jonathan jumped in, reassuring Nancy, as Steve took a step back. “You’re not leaving my sight.” He whispered in her ear once he got by her side, their foreheads touching. 

You smiled to yourself, a sweet moment between them. The world stopped for them, you could tell, and that’s exactly what you were craving right now, and worrying you might never get back. 

“Fine, but we still don’t know how to get in.” Steve added, his arms flexing in front of his chest as he shook his head in defeat. 

“Watergate.” You mutter. 

“You’re insane.” Robin snapped as soon as she heard you, pausing in between words. “Even if we did manage to get down there and it was still open, how do you plan on coming back with him? What if there’s more rabies infected bats around? What if you get stuck there this time? We need to find another gate!” She was now talking in full speed, cascading words as her thoughts entered her mind. 

“So we go to the woods!” You whine, frustration and impatience invade you once more. 

“The woods?” Steve asked. 

“She’s right.” Dustin added, his eyes finally leaving the ground shining as they did so. “Vecna killed Patrick and that created Watergate, so maybe there’s a gate near Fred’s death, like the one in the trailer…”

“What?” You questioned him as you saw him losing the train of thought. “We go to the woods and we get in and out, what’s wrong?” 

“We killed Vecna, so the upside down should be collapsing since he isn’t alive and isn’t there to power it so…” He continued as he thought out loud. 

“So what?” Steve asked as his voice went higher in tone. 

“So it’s crumbling down.” Dustin pointed out as if it was overly obvious. 

“So we have to go, now.” You said at the same time, heading to the door, no time to waste. 

You heard their footsteps following you as you found your way to your car, you were finally getting somewhere.

-

You thought you would feel relieved once you saw you were right, what you weren’t expecting was your jaw to clench at the sight of the hidden gate. 

It wasn’t big, it was small and weak. 

The same thing that happened back in the graveyard started again. The wind picked up, hollowing through the trees replacing the chirping of the birds. 

“Take care.” Nancy said with a trembling voice, while her hand was holding tightly with Jonathan’s. 

Steve’s grip on his bat changed, firm and steady now, before twisting it a bit, readjusting it so he’d be more comfortable. Dustin’s hands fidgeted with the end of his jacket, patting his pockets checking once again that he wasn’t missing anything. 

“If we’re not here in an hour, check in with El, she’s with the others guarding Max, but she should be able to…” Dustin recalled for the hundredth time, going over the plan he had been yelling about in the car drive over here. 

“Yeah, one hour. Got it.” Jonathan nodded as he spoke, waving bye as you stepped in. 

You just pressed your lips as you heard him. 

If you only had an hour, you had to make it count. And it had to start now. 

You had never just walked into the upside down. You had always fallen into it, so you didn’t have time to actually feel the veil breaking as your skin found its way in, the viscosity of the red hue, and the dryness that could be felt immediately after that. Your eyes slowly adjusted to the lack of colour and light, as you became hypervigilant, looking up at the sky before the others found their way. 

Nothing. 

There was absolutely nothing there. 

A cloudless sunless grey sky welcomed you, with no thunder or lightning. 

If anything, that nothingness was just more unnerving. 

Every step they made echoed through, and made you look around, hoping to find something that would make you keep your hopes up. 

You agreed on walking to the graveyard, if there was nothing there, you’d find your way to the trailer park and go back. 

“Something’s weird.” Steve pointed out, as he looked around. 

“Not weird, decaying.” You added, nodding to a grey crumbled up vine. The hole in it seemed to get deeper and bigger by the second. 

“Quiet.” Robin said, as she looked up. “There’s no bats, no thunder either.” 

“You can still trip though.” You told her as you held her from stepping into a fallen tree branch. 

You walked, you weren’t really sure for how long, yet she was right, it was oddly beautiful now. A stuck in time version of Hawkins where nothing seemed to change, where everything looked as if it was straight out of an antique photograph you had found hidden in a cupboard. 

You could see the iron gate from the cemetery, the bars on it starting to fold down, as if they were wilting flowers of an old bouquet. You felt as you collectively held in your breath. 

It wasn’t long after that that you started hearing someone yelling unintelligible things. 

While you were slowly making your way in, Eddie lied there. 

He was right where you thought he’d be -unaware that you were near him- an empty space between gravestones, his body falling into the floor, exhausted from getting there, starving and malnourished. He had been talking nonsense for a while, he started whispering it into the heavens, until now, his voice was loud, and even if he didn’t intend to, panic found its way in it. 

“Just one more song? Please? I need to know you’re there. I’ll sing along again if you want!” He had been looking at the void in the sky for a long time, he wasn’t sure if it had been an hour or two, to be honest, it felt like he had been there for days. “C’mon baby, please? Just a bit more, a guitar solo, or just… your voice would be nice…” He started begging now, pleading with some force he didn’t quite believe in for something that would indicate you’re there, near. “For fuck sake! I know I’ll die here, at least you could play some music while I do so!” Themix of desperation and tiredness was now getting into him, he looked at his hands and realised how his rings looked bigger, then now danced and moved with more ease. “Or just… Maybe if you light one up?” 

At the same time, you started hearing his screams, and you started picking up the pace, running through the maze of granite carved stones, with different names and dates. 

Dustin was the first to start screaming his name, while you just focused on running near where the voice came from. 

You’d know it was him even if you hadn’t heard him in thirty years. 

Adrenaline came over your body, so you rushed until your legs stopped, all of a sudden once you saw him. 

He was there, his hand on his stomach, where blackened stains in his shirt layed wrinkled. 

He was there, his hair laid perfectly still in a careful knotted mess. 

He was there, his chest raised up and down as he breathed. 

He was there, and he was alive. 

“Moon…?” The nickname you had for him fell from your lips, your tone shaking as you still couldn’t believe it. 

He slowly stood up, a grin of discomfort from pain evident in his face. He looked at you, his eyes barely opening up. He was still sitting on the ground, you felt your lips curving upwards as relief invaded you, seeing him smiling at you in recognition. 

“Eddie?!” Dustin screamed as he ran up to him, falling to his knees as he hugged him, his head hitting his chest, Eddie’s arms slowly wrapped around his body. “I thought I… We lost you…”  His voice was muffled, still you could tell he had started crying. 

“I thought I lost you too.” Eddie’s voice trembled as he looked directly at you. His eyes crystalised once he saw the first tear jump from your eyes. 

You felt Robin’s hand on your shoulder, a thigh squeeze letting you know it was real. He was okay, and you were getting him back. 

She nodded, letting you know it was okay if you wanted to interrupt.

You walked slowly to him, the back of your hand wiping away your tears. You let your body hit the floor, you couldn’t keep your eyes off of him. 

“Hi” You whispered as soon as you were a breath away from him. 

“Hi” He gleamed back as soon as he got you close. 

“You’re okay?” You asked, as your voice quivered, desperate to hear him again, talking directly to you. 

“Yeah, I’m okay.” He nodded as a trembling hand found the back of your neck. 

Dustin smiled before stepping back, leaving you both alone for a moment, a much needed moment. 

You gave in, melting into his arms. You were both crying quietly now, his hands stroking your hair politely, afraid that you were nothing but a mirage, while yours held on thigh to him, scared that you would cause him pain from needing that close. 

“You scared me to death.” You half joked as you chuckled through the crying. 

“I’m the one dying.” He added on to the joke, his lips finally kissing your temple, drinking your perfume in as he did so. 

“Shut it.” You shake your head as you slowly pull back, your hand now cupping his cheek, as your thumb slowly graces the high points of his cheekbone. “I’m getting you home.” 

You thought about kissing him, your lips touching his, melting completely under his touch. But once he leaned in to do so you saw how blood stained his shirt again, your eyes darted from his as you looked down, the red growing wider by the second. 

Fear invaded your body again, a sense of urgency creeping over both of you. 

“Yeah, we should really go” He grunted through gritted teeth. 

-

It had been a blur. 

Nancy grabbed your car keys from your hand, as you helped Eddie inside the car, sitting on the back with him. Cradling him as you talked to him, trying to keep him calm even if you were panicking deep inside. 

Steve arrived at his house before you, opening the door wide open, Robin helping you bring Eddie in. 

They were downstairs now, phoning Hopper, and El and finally Wayne. 

Steve’s bedroom guest had a big window where sun creeped in, a soft breeze helping him cool off as cold sweat dripped from his forehead. You helped him lay on the soft mattress sitting next to him carefully. 

You had enough supplies hidden under the bed, you knew you could stitch him up enough so he would stop hurting, you had enough experience patching people up. 

“Can you take your shirt off?” You asked him with a slight raise of your eyebrows. 

“You already want me naked?” He joked. He tended to do that when he got nervous. You tilted your head as you bent over so you could take the little box full of supplies out of underneath the bed. He chuckled once he saw the box in your hands. He started trying to take his jacket off, with a grunt in his face he shook his head. “I might need help.” He admitted, a grunt on the back of his throat. 

“Thought so.” You muttered under your breath. 

You scootched over to him, your trembling hands becoming steadier as they found the neck of his jacket, pulling it down slowly. At first, Eddie moved, tried to help. Once he felt your hands against his arms however, he stood still, his eyes not letting go of you, and the way your hands moved with such carefulness and tenderness. 

The tips of your fingers were now in between his skin and his shirt, soaked in dirt and blood. 

You looked at him before pulling it up, he nodded, his eyelids halved opened, a cautious smile in his lips. He sucked to his teeth as his skin separated from the stiff cloth, your fingers brushed his abdomen with care, avoiding to trace his skin as soon as you saw the grin of discomfort he had on his lips. His arms ached once they were up in the air, the shirt falling off of them slowly. 

“It looks worse than I thought.” Eddie grunted as he finally looked down. You guided his torso against the cushions that were prepped up, his hand lingered to your arms, the tip of his fingers burrowing into your skin. 

“I’ll clean it up, I’m sure it’s not that bad.” You tried to play it off, a kind smile curved your lips upwards, a little gesture he imitated. 

“You must really like me” He started in a soft whisper. “You keep lying trying to make it all better.” 

You laughed it off, a short chuckle coming out of him. You started soaking the cotton swab with alcohol, the odor of it filling the small gap between the both of you. 

“You know I do.” He smiled in a soft manner, his teeth showing as he tilted his head. “Ready?” 

“Yeah.” 

You smiled kindly before starting to clean his wounds. They were as if someone ripped and crumpled a paper sheet. They weren’t deep, just repetitive bite and claw marks over the same spot. The big one was on his lower abdomen, another one near his collarbone, a gash on his neck. His arms were full of scratches and deep cuts you had to keep clean. 

He didn’t complain. He just let you do whatever you thought you had to, deep down he knew that if he let you take care of him, you’d feel better. And if he was being honest with himself, he enjoyed you dotting and caring for him, you knew it was because he won’t trust anyone else but you. 

“You know you could just wait for Hopper to come right? He’ll probably make me go to a hospital or something.” He whispered in an attempt to get you to look back at him, his eyes not leaving yours. 

“I know, I just…” 

“I’m okay.” He started, reassuring you, trying to get you to stop overcleaning the same spot on his chest. “Hey.” You kept overdoing it, a blank look on your face. “Darling, please…” He begged now, the way his lips said the nickname snapping you out of it. 

“I thought you were dead.” You crumbled down, nervous tears threatening to jump out, your lips quivering as you started to talk. “I thought you were gone, Moon…” 

“I’m not.” He reached out, his hand finally holding yours. “You really think it’s going to be that easy? You’re not getting rid of me.” 

“I buried you… Well there was nothing in there but… I just.”

“I know, I heard you and Wayne talking.” He confessed, his eyes changing, now they were full of melancholy, and a hint of guilt. “I’m sorry by the way…” 

“What the fuck are you on?” The words fell right out of your lips, tilting your head as your tone went higher. 

“I just… I heard you crying. Begging and all that. I’m sorry I almost died and I’m sorry I didn’t tell you everything I wanted to, I’m sorry I didn’t tell you I loved you before, I’m sorry I left I-” You interrupted him, as soon as you heard the big word. Your hand tightening around his. 

“You do?” 

“I do what?” He tried to brush it off, the confession had fallen out of his mouth without him thinking too much about it. 

“Love me?” You were embarrassed by how hopeful you sound. His free hand travelled to your cheek, slowly stroking it as he looked deeply into your eyes, falling deeply into them. 

You gave in, your head now resting in the palm of his hand, he slowly pulled you closer to him. Finally closing the distance between the both of you, slowly, then all at once. His lips met yours, a smile appearing on both of them. It was a careful kiss, a needy and soft kiss. It said more things than you both could ever tell eachother. His lips begged for yours to never leave him again, to let him stay by your side. Yours were yelling for him to be patient, and let you love him in a quiet and slow manner. 

You pulled away slowly, your forehead touching his. 

You both knew each other understood. Still, he whispered low enough for you to barely hear him, right before you were interrupted by the door opening. “Of course I do.” 

“Happy you’re back kid.” Hopper’s voice interrupted the both of you, moving your heads so you could look at him. “I’m sorry but you’ll have to answer a couple of questions, then go to the hospital”

“Stay?” Eddie asked, a promise in his voice. 

“Yes. For as long as you let me.” 

He kissed the tip of your nose, before talking again. 

“Oh, yeah…” You were a bit embarrassed, thought it always seemed to happen when you had fantasized about him the night before. 

Something was different, but you weren’t sure what had happened. 

“Do you got any lessons today?” He asked, taking a step closer to you, your eyes not leaving his. Even if the temptation of not only looking but thristlin all over his body was a breath away.

“M’yeah.” Your words were still sticking together, still not awake, not even sure if this was all a weird dream. “Need to wake up first.” You added as you took another sip of the warm drink he had made for you. 

“You’re really pretty in the morning, honey.” honey. that was new. 

You weren’t sure if it was the fact that he had called you pretty, or honey, but you were turnin redded by the second. But if you were honest, it was the way his thumb had caressed your cheek and your lip briefly. Maybe it was the small moment his eyes had left your so they could look at your lips. 

He left, back to his room. 

You stood there for a minute longer after your cup was empty. 

-

You left three knocks on his door, grabbing your towel tightly. 

“Yeah?!” His voice had a tone of urgency in it, a quickness you weren’t used to. 

“Um, I’m heading to the shower now, if you need the bathroom, go.” You talked to the wooden door, a bit closer than it was probably necessary, but before you could turn your back, it opened, a messy haired Steve appearing inches away from you, his eyes seemed softer lately, especially when they looked at you. 

“I was thinking of taking one.” He gave you an upside down smile, and a weird look that you didn’t understand. His eyes looked darker, no longer like honey, but more like caramel. 

“Oh.” You sounded surprised, and if your voice wasn’t enough, your widened eyes that had been left open gave you away. It was working, Steve thought. 

“What?” His cheery tone made your eyebrows unforrow for a moment, as his arms crossed in front of his chest, his forearm gracing your skin for a brief second. 

“Nothing, just… You never take night showers.” He chuckles as he hears you say it, nodding along to your words. 

“We could share.” He adds, in a successful attempt to make you blush. Your skin filling up with goosebumps as those words reach your ears. 

“Funny.” Your voice comes out drier that you intended it to, turning away from him, embarrassment already present on your body. 

He noticed it immediately. The way you had clenched your jaw, the vein of your neck briefly appearing, your lips pursed together before you nodded. He felt guilty, he had been too cocky when all he was is a big idiot for you. 

His hand grabbed yours as you were turning away, not too far away from him yet, turning your body so you’d face him, and he let his fingers linger on your wrist, a sorry look on his eyes. 

“What?” He whispered, the softness of his voice washing the childish tantrum out of you. 

“Nothing.” You whispered back, but the way his head hangs low, falling to his left side as he gave you that i don’t buy it look, made you realise with no words needed that he required a deeper explanation. “Just, why would you say something like that?” 

Steve isn’t sure what he could do now, or what he should do. 

He could tell you the plain truth, he heard you last night and he wants to be the reason why you scream in such a beautiful way. 

He could stay quiet, and just say that he was kidding and that he’s sorry. 

Or he could just kiss you. 

That last thought invades his mind, how would you feel? How would your lips feel against his? Would you kiss him back? 

Maybe that’s why, in that daze that we has in, your eyes looking up at him, with the smallest begging and the way your lips were parted, that the hand that wasn’t on your wrist finds its way to the back of your neck, and he takes a step closer. 

You can’t quite believe it’s happening, not really. 

Time seems to slow down. The way his head moves closer to you, your heart beating faster as you see him move, his muscles flexing as he does so, your skin getting warmer as your breathing becomes faster, your heartbeat louder. He stops for a second, his nose touching yours, as you enjoy the warmth that his breath leaves on your lips, the way it mixes with yours. Before you could even beg him to, he kisses you. 

As soon as his lips grace yours and you enjoy the softness of them, the hand that was holding your wrist finds its way to the small of your back, burying its fingers there. Soft touches combined with the desperate need you both seemed to share. 

Your hand moved to his jaw in a delicate way, too scared that if you moved too fast this might disappear, that it might not be real anymore. 

You started to play with his hair, as he left deeper, needier kisses on your lips A moan escaping his, the way he sounded and most of all, you being the reason for it, it made your whole skin flourish, the electricity growing stronger each second. 

He lets go of your wrist, both hands now hugging your waist, pulling you closely until your hips meet, his touch becoming a desperate one. Walking slowly back into his room, where the soft study light and the air filled with his smell only made your skin now with goosebumps, every inch were his hands touched your skin now in fire.

The heels of your feet touched the end of his bed, the coldness and the noise it made separating your lips from his. The deepest cheesiest smile on both of your faces, your foreheads still together. 

Before you muttered a word, his fingers slipped between your skin and the sides of your thong, teasing you with the way he pulled on it. In a similar way, in your dazed state you started to play with the neck of his shirt. Your nose touching his, still not sure if this was real.

“That's why” Steve sighted with unfinished pleasure, his voice barely above a whisper. 

“I really like you, Steve.” You breathed out, a confession you weren’t conscious you were making. 

“I know.” He answered, finally making eye contact with you, your eyes shining brighter as his were full of desire. “I kinnda heard you, in the shower.” He added suggestively, teasing you as he giggled. 

Your face became various tones of pink, as embarrassment found its way to you. You tried burying your head behind your hands, but he was quicker, instead he pushed his chest so your head would hit it, wrapping his arms around you. 

“Oh no.” You chuckled as you couldn’t believe it.  

“I’ve liked you since before that though.” He whispered into your ear, kissing your temple before he continued talking. “I just wanted to be the one touching you.” His breath brushing your ear, he smelt of the candles you had picked when you first moved in, vanilla and cinnamon. “Especially if you're screaming my name.” 

“Do you still..?” He laughed, an angelic sound pressed to your ear. 

He started to plant kisses along your jawline in response. A desperate whimper escaped your lips as soon as you felt his, needing more of him. All of him. 

Your hands started to mess with his hair, pulling him in deeper, the kisses he left wetter, with a few bites that made you smile with pleasure when you felt them. 

You grabbed the back of his neck, guiding him back to your lips, wanting to feel him again, needing to taste him once more. Before you were aware of it, your hands were messing with his shorts wristband, asking for permission that you already had. You smiled in between kisses when you felt his skin immediately, no underwear on. 

You didn’t need to see him to know he was big, bigger than you expected. You felt a smirk on his lips as he pulled away for a second. 

“That feels…” He was out of breath, his words knotted on his throat, coming out as broken sobs, wanting more. 

“Good?” You ask, as your hand slips back in, wrapping on his cock, his nails digging on your skin. 

“Yes.” He moaned as his head flew back, your lips starting a trail of kisses that began on the back of his ear and finished on his stomach. He shuddered with each one, and seeing you on your knees just made him moan louder. “Fuck me” 

“I’m trying.” You answered, a stupid laugh shared between the both of you, that stopped abruptly as soon as you started kissing him through the thin fabric. 

His hands buried in your hair, caressing you as he guided you, begging you with his touch, a silent way of saying please eat me. 

So you did, you pulled the shorts down, and started licking his tip, licking your lips seeing him from that point of view. Steve, with a crossed look on his eyes, already gone, already imagining how you’ll feel. 

You opened your mouth wide, starting to fill your mouth with him, feeling him twitch as you did so. He needed you more and more as each time his cock entered and exited your mouth made you hungrier for him. 

“Shit, honey.” He mumbled out, as he had trouble staying on his knees, the view that he had a perfect one. “You’re really fuckin good at that.” 

His praise made the exact effect you knew it would have. Made you swallow him whole, feeling his tip on the back of his throat, as his grip became tighter around your hair. 

He used it to pull you up, kissing you while he tasted a bit of him on your lips. With one swift movement your shirt ended on the floor, with another one, your thong joined it. He grabbed you by the waist, pulling you in a tight hug, as he sat you down carefully on the verge of his bed. He started kissing all of your body. He stopped once he arrived on your boobs, licking and nibbling at your nipples, leaving small love bites under one of them, as you exhaled in short breath in response. A soft moaning provocated by him kissing down your stomach. The coldness of his breath shocked you as he came close to your cunt, the wetness of it becoming cold when his breath reached it, before starting to kiss right above it, around it. 

“Steve.” You whimpered, looking down at him, biting your lips as he looked up at you, a smile dedicated to you. 

“You look so angelic.” He answered. “I wonder if you’ll sound it too.” He teased, right before his lips started to eat you out. 

A sharp moan escaped your lips, as the warmth of his mouth invaded you, he knew exactly how to move your tongue, your hips already moving as he fucked you with his tongue. Your mouth was becoming dry, your lips parted as you couldn’t stop moaning, begging, or simply just whimpering with no sound. Your whole body felt on fire, starting with the way Steve made you feel, reaching to your lips where you wanted to be touched. 

“Love…” You managed to whisper, smiling when you saw the way he did once he heard you. “I need you.” You cried out, happily when you saw him climb on top of you, kissing you senseless as you could taste your sweetness on his lips. 

“Where?” He groaned out, as his hand caressed your whole body, too busy kissing every inch of your skin he could. 

“Everywhere.” 

He took that as an invitation, you felt the way one of his fingers opened you up, slowly. You did the same with him. Your hand wrapped around his cock once again, you were going at the same pace, if he fingered you harder, or faster, you did the same. 

Until you couldn’t take it anymore. You really needed him. 

“I really need you, Stevie.” He nodded, and left one more kiss on your lips. 

He grabbed you by the waist, pulling your body in the middle of the bed. He took his cock, his fingers brushing yours, as he searched for your wet entrance. The first thrust was always the best one. 

His body relaxed instantly, and so did yours. You melted into one, a release was made, he was inside, and once he looked you in the eyes, a is this okay? that you answered with a sincere smile and a nod. 

He went in again. And again. And again. Your legs parting with every movement, wrapping around his waist, his body sinking deeper into yours. 

“You feel… fuck.” He wasn’t able to finish his sentence. Your waist pulling up with his latest thrust, he could tell his dick was exactly in the right place, your walls closing down on him.

Light touches traveled down his back, as your fingers searched where to grab him, needing him deeper, wanting him more than you ever had. 

He understood. 

He grabbed your leg, pulling it up so it would rest on his shoulder. A cocky smile escaped his lips as he saw you groan with pleasure when he hit deeper, and harder. 

He didn’t stop, the noise his body left when it hit you was engraving itself on your brain. It wasn’t the only thing. 

From now on, when you close your eyes you can see Steve like that, enamored by you, his eyes only shining for you, his pretty girl. 

“Keep making that sound, please.” He begged, once he started to hear the way you were running out of breath, trying to say his name. 

“Steve, Steve I’m…” 

“I know, honey, me too.” He whimpered, as he continued. 

You wanted him to finish inside. 

So your legs wrapped tightly around him, your nails burying deep in his skin, begging for him to stay doing the exact same thing. He kissed you again, and again. His wet kisses on your skin only made you even more overstimulated. 

“Honey I’m-” You shut him up with a kiss, your right hand pulling his hair closer to you. 

“Come, inside. Please.” It was the begging that did it for him. 

Or maybe it was seeing you, your skin fleshed in pretty tones of pink, hair messed up by him, begging for him, needing him that made him a goner. He pressed tightly his body against yours, and came, as you had been doing for a while now. 

His weight over your becoming a warm blanket. You stayed like that for a second, him still inside of you, as you cuddled on top of his sheets. 

And the same question on both of your heads.